I Am Lavern

--Winner of the Dear Diary Competition-- Prepare for rants, opinions, my life, and the general ramblings of an 8th grader (update: 9th grader) who lives in the smack dab middle of South Carolina.


2. 08/03/2015

11:30 AM

As many of you know, I am a very ranty person, if such an adjective exists. I have ranted and vented to and about so many people and things,  but the one thing that never ceases to get to me is how much teenager's opinions are discounted. There are so many stereotypes that say we, kids ages 11-19, are too naïve to understand how the real world works. Our angry outbursts are just caused because we are a moody and hormonal child.

I can't tell you how many times someone has told me or implied that I am just a kid who doesn't understand how the adult world works even though I have lived in it all of my life. How many of you have been told you do something because you are a teen? Yup, I see a majority of hands raised. No one wants to take me seriously, and it annoys me. 

If I talk about this for much longer, I will probably get super upset, type some long thing I will regret, and bore you, so I won't continue. 

In 8th grade at my school, I have to do an 8th grade speech. I have a few ideas on what mine is going to be about. Here is what I am thinking: I want to do my speech about boxes. It sounds weird, but here me out. I would relate it to labels and how we are all stuffed into these boxes, but that runs into some problems because I can't say the big labels like gay, anorexic, etc. because I am in a private middle school.

That is another point! Why can't I talk about those things at school? Since when did labels become bad words we should shield children from?

Back to the speech. So, yeah, I want to do it about boxes or nerds (specifically nerdfighteria). I want to inspire these people, but I have to figure out how to get them to listen. I have sat through some bad speeches over the last three years, and I know what clicks. I think this is a way that I can affect these people. I don't want them to remember my name, I want them to remember what I said.

I also kind of feel like talking about my Movellas life. I just finished When War Approaches. It is kind of sad that it is over even though it has a happy ending. I am going to do some hardcore editing until the 12th to get it ready for the competition. I am also almost done with The Blackmail Project - it only has three more chapters left, but I am also about to start my newest movella - What to Live For, but I haven't quite finished planning out the plot yet.

I am starting to yet kind of hungry, so I will talk more later in the day. Time to go pester my parents for some food.

Wish me luck,


11:53 AM

I have returned after only a few momments. My mom is going to take me somewhere after Kelly and Michael is over. We'll see how that goes because I am currently wearing a fleece sweater, short shorts, and Easter socks. I'm normal - promise.

I kind of feel like writing a speech right now. It just kind of fills me with energy, so here is goes. I am going to talk about... Forgiveness. Let's see how it goes:


We all know the feeling that you get after you do something that can't be forgiven. When you hurt someone beyond repair. Scars on the outside will fade, but cuts into your soul never heal. Sorry means that you won't do it again, but sometimes, even after someone says this, you still can't forgive them, and even if you do, you won't forget it. Trust is a touchable resource that can't be given back once it is taken.

So, how do you get forgiveness? The simple answer is that you don't. There is no one thing you can say that is going to make that person forgive you. You have to show them. Show them that you are sorry, truly sorry, and that it affecting your happiness. You can also show them that you have changed.

There are two kind of people: people who believe in second chances and those who don't. You have to know when you can't push any further, and sometimes, like all movies say, sorry isn't enough.


I am seriously unsure if that is uplifting or saddening. I don't know were I was going with that. When I type stuff like that, it brings back all the memories about that topic, and in this case, it brought back memories of betrayal - both from myself and from others. Darn, now I am kind of sad.

Let's talk about happy stuff! My cat meowed for 30 minutes straight this morning. I mean, he breathed, but her was determined to get down the hallway. I started meowing back at him. All of this was happening around 8 in the morning, and my dad gave me the strangest look when he woke up.

Now, I am actually going to eat lunch.



4:45 PM

Before I talk about what I want to talk/rant about, I guess I shall tell you what I have been doing for the past four or so hours. I went to eat a sub at a local place with my mom, got a pedicure, and went the grocery store. Goodness, that doesn't sounds like four hours worth of stuff.

Oh and sorry for any typos - I am using my dad's work computer, and I'm not really used to it. The following rant was inspired by Sam HB's rant:

There are several holidays around the world that annoy me, but I want to talk about Gay Pride Day (or week in some places) and Women's day. I understand that these are celebrating equality and all that jazz, but it seems like everyone who isn't gay and who isn't a woman is saying: "You're different, so let's have a day to celebrate that and pretend like you aren't second class citizens!" Instead of marching around wearing rainbows, let's actually do something about the injustice! Sure some great projects have been started, and I support those, but it just feels like the whole world is rubbing in the fact that women and gays don't have the same rights. Yes, I am pretty sure a boss can still legally fire someone for homosexual activities in the US, and a woman's dollar is worth around 20% less compared to the man's. We need to spend more money on projects and things and less money on parades. I know some people are going to disagree with me on this but that is my opinion.

Now, like when I did that weird speech on forgiveness, I feel like I should talk about a lighter topic. I think I have one even though it isn't all that light:

As some of you know, I went to a summer camp for 3 weeks in North Carolina in June, but now I have aged out of that session. The only one I can do now is 5 weeks - a little more than all of July. It is a huge decision! If I don't do it, I will be put on the bottom of the waiting list, but if I do, I will be spending most of my summer at camp. There are so many pros and cons. I think I am going to do it, but I will write in here when I make the official decision.

I guess I am going to listen to some music, make some covers, finish planning for What to Live For, and maybe start on the first chapter. If I think of anything else to say, I will post another subentry before I go to bed.




8:51 PM

I am currently in bed on my IPad, so I am sure you will see the creativeness of autocorrect. 

Anyway, I love music. I love playing it, listening to it, and singing it. I can play 3 instruments: piano (5 years), trumpet (4 years), and guitar (a few months). I love to sing, and I am told I am pretty good at it. Currently my range is about 3D to 5C ( about 2 octaves), but I am working on it every day, mostly in the shower XD.

So, I am telling you all this because I got some new sheet music! I can now play Stay With Me and Say Something on the piano, and I am working on All of Me.

That is pretty much all I wanted to tell you, so goodnight!


Join MovellasFind out what all the buzz is about. Join now to start sharing your creativity and passion
Loading ...