Try Fitting in My Glass Slipper

This is the diary of a crazy Drama Geek who swears her group of friends should have their own reality TV show called "Well... That was a bad idea."


1. Shoes can change your life

My favorite princess growing up was Cinderella. The thought of a girl that no one took a second glance at falling in love with a prince enticed me- just like it does to almost any other four year old girl.

I had this dream the one day I would wake up and an invitation to a ball would be on my doorstep. Everyday I would wait for the mailman to bring me that letter, and everyday I received nothing. That was when I simply decided that shoes were my only option, because obviously my looks weren't cutting it. I mean, everyone ten year old girl knew that a good pair of shoes could change your life. You see, I had this idea that if I just left shoes laying around, then surely my prince would find it and return it to me. When that didn't work, I would wear a new shoe everyday and try to figure out which shoes I was wearing on my best days in hopes to find my one lucky shoe: my glass slipper. Approximately one hundred and four shoes later, (six years in human time) I have still not found my Prince Charming.

I have, however, found a normal guy who works at my local grocery store. He is far from a rich prince, but he sure is good at (fake) sword fighting.

Okay, let me explain.

After church every Sunday I bring this girl, whom I have been friends with since birth, over to my house. One Sunday my mom urgently needs to go to the grocery store, so we bring her with us. She and I wait at the deli to get a pound of ham while my mom continues to shop. So, there we are, waiting in front of an array of meats until someone comes to help us. After a few minutes of waiting, we get bored and want something to do. Nearby there are green wires used to tie up the bags you put the produce in, so we both grab one and begin to sword fight with them in the middle of the isle. And by sword fight, I mean full on sound effects of swords clashing and everything.

After a few more minutes of getting WAY too into sword fighting, a loud cough interrupts us. We both jump at the sudden noise and jerk our heads towards the sound. Standing right there behind the deli counter is the epitome of perfection. Okay, maybe I over exaggerated with that perfection thing a bit. He actually isn't that attractive, his teeth are pretty crooked, and he was wearing a hair net, but it was the way he was looking at me that really hooked me. He wasn't disgusted and weirded out by my previous actions. In fact, when I turned around, completely embarrassed about the aforementioned happenings, he looked fully entertained. He had on his face the biggest smile anyone had ever given me and for a moment neither of us said anything- I just looked at him horrified, while he smiled back at me.

"I'm sorry." I said, struggling for words, "How long have you been there?"

He laughed a bit, "I started walking up when you guys started."


"Hey, don't worry about it. We're all mad here."

My brain at this point: Wait. Did he just quote Alice in Wonderland?

"Get it," he continued, "from Alice in Wonderland?"

My brain: Any employee could've walked up to help me right now while I'm embarrassingly sword fighting, but, of course, it had to be a cute guy who quotes Alice in Wonderland. This is just great. (Note the sarcasm)

"So, what kind of meat do you want?"

"Umm..." I replied, lost for words. Luckily, my friend, Bella, covered for me and tells him that we want ham.

It was right then, as he was grabbing my ham, that he looked up at me with a lip bite. Yes, I'm serious, a lip bite! Bella swears that he didn't bite his lip, but, trust me, he did!

"Well, there you go." He said after weighing my ham and zipping the bag he put it in. "I hope you have a nice day."

"You, too."

I grabbed the bag from his hands and ran as fast as I could back to my mother, and that was the day I met my Peasant Charming.

I came back to the grocery store exactly a week later, and there he was behind the deli counter- hair net and all. We had just recently ran out of ham and needed some more, which was used as a great excuse to give me the courage to go up there. We both hadn't exchanged any words besides the telling of what meat I wanted. I was sure he didn't remember me, so of course I didn't say anything.

After weighing my ham he looks up at me and squints his eyes. "This is going to be really awkward if you're not who I think you are, but, by any chance, do you like sword fighting?"

My brain: Oh my gosh! He remember me! Go me! Go me! Go me!

My facial expression: Horror.

"Yeah, that's me." I say after a super long awkward pause.

"Okay, cool. I'm Carlos, by the way." He points to his name tag clipped to his collar.

"I'm Jayne." I point to my collar.

"What are you pointing at?"

"Oh, this is where my name tag would be if I had one. You know, because you have a name tag, but I don't. It's just a-" I pause, realizing how stupid I sound. "It's a just a joke."

"Oh," he nods. "Well, I'm sure it was hilarious."

"Yeah, it was."

He laughs.

My brain: Seriously? Now you think I'm funny? Okay.

"Here you go."

I take my ham and leave without looking back.

Weeks pass and visits to the grocery store increase as I become more comfortable around him, and he around me. We usually would just have small conversations as he gives me my ham, until he gets promoted to cashier which gives us longer conversations. Up until the day that I go in with my mom for a long grocery trip. When I walk in the door, I immediately get disappointed that his register is empty- meaning that he's not working.

Much to my surprise, in the middle of shopping, I feel a tap on my shoulder. When I turn around, Carlos is throwing me a green wire bag tie and yelling: "On guard!"

"What are you doing?" I laughed.

"I'm sword fighting you, of course."

"Well, I must warn you that I am very skilled."

"Prove it." He wiggled his bag tie between his fingers, when with one small hit I knocked it out of his hand.

"Did I prove it, yet?"

"That's not fair. You practice."

"Actually, I distract my opponents with my good looks." I joked.

"That makes so much sense. I mean, that's obviously what you just did to me."

My brain: what.

"That's not fair. Next time you must wear a paper bag over you head."

My brain: what.

"Well, I better be going back to work. Im shelving things today."

"Fun." I said unenthusiastically.

"I know, right?" He laughed and leaves.

By the time I get into line there are three checkout lanes opened with at least five carts in each. Out of nowhere, I feel a hand on the back of my elbow and I instantly know who it is. The touch is followed by a whisper in my ear: "I'll take you on register three."

Have sexier words ever been spoken? I think not.

"Nothing like special service, huh?" Carlos said to my mom as she began to unload our items onto the conveyor belt.

"Thanks for letting us out of that long line." I said to him.

"Of course. Anything for my VIP costumer."

And that's how I got to here: crushing on the guy from the grocery store. Desperately hoping this peasant might just find my glass slipper.

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