MY FIRST LOVE

This is a story about I first time falling in love with a girl, and what I did and didn't do with her.

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1. MY FIRST LOVE

Made from June 8 2015 - June 13 2015

 

    (June 8 2015) This is a story about a boy’s first experience falling in love with a girl, but he told her that he like her before got to know that close.

 

    Hallo, my name is H, I’m grade 9 and this is my experience falling in love with a girl name N she is grade 7. I first meet her at my swimming course, I wasn’t new. I went there for around 4 years, and N just started to go there. When she first came to my swimming course, my mind start telling me to get to know the girl. But guts to do that so, I let it be for around 1 and a half month later. One kid named Bryan came, he was around 6 years old. He was so cute and so funny, I started to talking to Bryan. I made a lot of jokes, some people who were there start to laugh to. And N start to laugh all so, at that moment my heart was stolen by her. When I saw her laugh and smiles, it was the best day of my life I never felt anything like this. It’s I would do anything and I mean anything, just to see her smile. It’s was that important for me, just to see that and felt the happiness around me. I was enjoying every moment and every second, when the next week she didn’t came to the swimming course again.

 

    Then I started to ask my tutor about her, and my tutor said that she chance schedule. I got a break down, and I started to feel sad and don’t know what to do anymore. Then when I finished my course I started to fine her Instagram, but the worst part is I don’t know what grade she was. But luckily I have a friend from grade 7 and 8, I know that she is younger than me so I don’t search from my friends. I spend about 2-3 hours just to find her Instagram account, but I finally did it. From that day I started to post me playing Guitar, because that was the thing I am good at. I also watch her when she starts to open her Instagram, when I found the time I post my video a couples hours before the time. Post it a few times, but she haven’t like any of it. When I got the time perfectly, I saw the notification that shows me that she like my video. I has so happy, after that moment I want to finally get to know her a bit closer. I ask to one of my elementary teacher (AKA MK), he tough N when she was 5 grade and MK also has her contact. So this was my chance to get her contact, I ask MK to ask N to give permission for me to add her as contact. Because I can be sure that she will add me as her contact. So I did got her contact and she added me as friend.

 

    (June 9 2015) I has very nervous when I she accepted me as friend, I don’t know what to talk about or how to talk any more. I was that nervous to talk to her, and because of the motivation of my teacher. I did it, but at the next day because it was to tale to chat to her. I started to say “hai” and she reply and we star to chat together it was great, also she ask me my line and she was the one who added me. I was so happy, we start to talk on line. When a few hours later, after she added me at line she ask “who is your crush?”. I don’t know what to do or say, I can’t lie to her but I also can’t tell her that. So I tried to chance the topic, it works but then she ask me again about my crush again. I try to don’t reply but I can’t do that exceptionally to her, so at the afternoon I got a crazy Idea that made me regret till now. I said “let’s tell 1 characteristic of your crushes, take turn you go first”. Then she told one, then I told her one about her. We are doing this will I am talking to my tutor at my swimming court and my teacher, because I don’t know what to do. I made a bad dissection, then after around my fifth turn I look at what she said and it’s not me she was talking about. It was another boy, I knew him but I’m not really that closed with him. But the game still continue, she start to call names that I don’t even know the girls that she call. Then when I was at the end of my line, I talk to my 2 teacher that I will tell her the truth. So I did, I told her that “It is you and sorry if I shock you” something like that, I don’t really want to remember that part. Then she didn’t believe me at first, but I told her “it is the truth”. Then I ask about her crush I said “is it G”, then she said yes. But she also said before that she was told that he like someone else, but she doesn’t really know if it’s true.

 

    After she know that I like her, something unexpected happened. She invited me to take a selfie together, I was so shock and so confuse with my feeling. I’m not happy or sad, just confuse. Then I said ok, she reply and said “on tuesday?” and I said ok and she ask where and we where talking where we are going to meet. I don’t want to talk to much about this, because she forgot. I don’t know why or how can she forgot something like this, it was her exam days. But still, how can she forgot something like that. I waited for her at the place we talk about, and she did’t came. She finish her exam at around 12, I start waiting for her from 11:55 until 12:20. I know because I was looking at the time, I was watch everyone leave there classroom. I was happy at first, but not after 12:20 and that I started to think it was to good to be true. (note: Grade 7, 8, 10, and 11 is doing there exam, Grade 9 and 12 finish earlier and started holiday earlier to that’s why I can wait for her, and also on that day I did have go to school because I had to practice for my class performance it was great). So then I walk to my class to practice the performance, I was late because I wasted my time waiting. When I walk to class, I saw her eating with her friends at the Cafe (yes, my school has a cafe). I sit down at a distance, with my physics teacher. I also told him I like her, and told him what happened today and what I did. The my teacher told me that the exam has hard, maybe she forgot. But I think again, if she did forgot so she is not really interested in me. Because how can you forget something like that, I waited for a long time. Then I watch her leave after she finish eating, I said good bye to my teacher and follow her from a distance and watching her leave. It was the hardest thing I could do, because I know that i can call her but I didn’t. Then I walk to the classroom to practice my class performance, I was really late. Some of my friend did ask why I was late, but I try to chance the topic because I don’t want them to feel sad for me.

 

    (13 June 2015) When I got home, I though she will remember our meet up and says sorry. Well I was wrong, I was the one who remained her. I still can’t believe that she can forget something like that, then I ask her how about tomorrow. She said that she want to go to the doctor, then I ask “why?” she didn’t told me. After that day, we never did the selfie until now it just didn’t happened. From that day my interest with her went down, from 100% to 60%. Some of my friend and teacher still support me to chase her, so I give another opportunity but, I think is’t not really going to work. A few weeks past and I stared to giving up on her, even though they told me to fight for her. But I don’t know the reasons to fight for anymore, she didn’t even give me a chance to get to know her. Maybe I’m a little to rush on her, but how can I not. I really want to know the answer, from day 1 I meet her.

 

    After the selfie was canceled, she reply my chat like she is to lazy to type. She not just “Y” “LOL” no, longer but not as long as I aspect it to be. But she still reply my question, but never ask me back about me. She don’t want to know who am I, I’am just really confuse why is she doing this. But the thing that keeps me going is that, she called me “cute” that’s why started to chase her. I though she like me, maybe she did but not any more. Maybe it’s because what I said to her, maybe she is interest with someone else. I don’t know, but the only thing that I know is that she isn’t interest in me anymore. So I’am trying to move on, june 10-12 I was busy and also trying to move on. But every time I saw a pretty girl, I always remind me of N. I just stop thinking how or why, I still have this feeling. I just want to move on, because every time I think about her my heart hurt. And I don’t want to feel this way, it hurt so much.

 

    Now, I just remind this word me every time I think about N.

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“BETTER TO BE THE RIGHT PERSON THAN TO FIND THE RIGHT PERSON”

 

Sorry I can’t tell you my full name and the girl’s name to. And I’m sorry if I have a miss spelling and a confusing sentences, I’m not really good at english but I tried my best and hurt my emotion in.

Sorry if the story is a little short, and I skip a few weeks. Because at the few weeks, I don’t often talk to her. And I actually start to like her since March till June, and sorry again if I confuse you and I hope you can fix my words hehehehe….. and thx for reading my story.

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