Complications

"What's wrong? What's happening?"
"Just some complications."
-
Beth and Harry? Great match. But things are complicated. And how are you supposed to fight complications when they have been part of your relationship from the start?

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[ Beth's P.O.V. ]

One week. That was all we had until we had to say goodbye again. Of course I was looking forward to seeing Harry perform again, but seeing him onstage wasn't the same as seeing him in person. So I wasn't too thrilled at the prospect of watching him leave me. And I could see that he wasn't either. It was silent in the train compartment we were sitting in. Alone. I shifted slightly, getting more comfortable on his side. He tightened the hold he had on me, his arm slung around my shoulders. I could feel his hand shaking and wondered if he could possibly be feeling worse than I was. 

"Do you- do you trust me?" he suddenly asked, a slight quaver in his voice. I didn't answer right away, thinking hard. Did I trust him after what he had done to me? After the incident with Fiona?

"I-" 

I paused, thinking it through again. I had half  a mind to say that I didn't know, but I felt that wouldn't be true. I had seen how sorry Harry was and I'd believed that he hadn't meant to hurt me. And that he wouldn't ever want to do so either. I trusted him. Maybe it was stupid, but I trusted him.

"Yes," I finally answered softly. I turned my head to look up at him and I could see a frown line forming between his eyes. 

"Why though?" he mumbled, looking mortified. His forehead was wrinkled up and he was stroking my hand absentmindedly. I sighed and turned properly.

"Because I know you're a genuine person. And a person like you wouldn't hurt me. You're a good person and you've made a mistake, but that's okay. Mistakes are the things that make us better because we learn from them," I explained, giving him a small smile. He nodded slowly, staring out the window at the dull, rainy landscape flashing by. 

"I trust you won't do the same again, now cuddle me," I added jokingly, earning a chuckle as he pulled me closer. He rested his head on top of mine, his arms strong around me. 

"I'm going to miss you," he then murmured, swallowing loudly. I stayed quiet for a moment, realising that we said goodbye too often for my taste.

"I'm going to miss you too," I then replied quietly, trying to memorise all the little details of his hug. The way his arms pressed against my back, the beat of his heart against his chest, his fingers tracing irregular but steady patterns across my jacket. I closed my eyes, seeing if I could etch all those things into my mind permanently. For when he was gone. 

I was startled by the sudden announcement made over the intercom. Harry had immediately tensed up and his fingers had frozen. I slowly broke free from his embrace and looked out the window. The airport was looming ahead, looking more like a prison than ever. 

"We have to get ready to get off the train," I decided, giving him a quick peck on the lips. He stood up wordlessly and reached to haul his suitcase out of the overhead locker, standing it on the floor. I grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the compartment, towards the corridor. We then joined the throng of people scrambling towards the exit. Harry's hand was shaking again and I wondered why he was so nervous and scared. 

The lady speaking on the intercom repeated her announcement as everyone grouped by the doors. Harry tightened his hold on my hand, a worried look on his face. I gave his arm a small pat, deciding to forget my own apprehension so I could stay strong for the both of us. I took a moment, steeling myself as the train station belonging to the airport came ever closer. Harry was completely still beside me, his eyes fixed on our destination ahead. 

In no time at all, the train was slowing down, brakes squealing like a girl at a concert or like the haunting sound of death. It depended what mood you were in. Harry stayed motionless, not showing any sign of preparation like the other people around us did. He could have been a statue. 

Finally, the train stopped and the doors swung open, the crowd of people rushing out at once. I tried moving with the herd, but something stopped me. Harry's hand. It was holding me back. He still hadn't moved. I looked back at him urgently, trying to decipher the look on his face.

"Harry, come on, we have to get off," I told him softly, pulling at him lightly. He shook his head and my heart sank. 

"Come on," I tried again, gesturing towards the miraculously still open doors. He shook his head.

"Why not?" I asked, giving him a worried frown. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, as if he was trying to find the proper words to speak his mind.

"No, please don't make me," he then whispered, his voice so quiet, I could hardly hear him over the bustle outside the train. He took a step backwards, pressing his back against the closest surface as he stared out through the doors.

"Come on Harry, what's wrong?" I attempted again, worry lacing my words. But I felt slightly impatient. I didn't really feel like being stuck on the train. The idea intimidated me a bit. 

"What's wrong?" I repeated, stroking his hand slowly. He shook his head again, but spoke again.

"Please don't make me leave you?" he then whimpered, nibbling on his lower lip nervously.

"Why, what's the matter?" I questioned, feeling properly concerned. I'd never seen him like that. It was a bit disconcerting, but I had to stay strong.

"Just don't leave me, don't let me leave you," he said quickly, panic seeping into his sentence. I bit my lip, wondering what would be the best thing to do. I sighed inwardly when I came to the conclusion that we just had to stick to the plan.

"I feel the same, don't worry. But we have to get off now, otherwise you'll miss your flight," I insisted, giving his hand a little pull again. Harry started shaking his head again.

"Harry," I said weakly, my arm going limp. 

"I- I won't get off the train," he countered, sounding resolute while he looked just as scared as before. I could feel my eyebrows contract as I took him in sadly. 

"Harry. Please? You'll get into trouble," I said quietly for the last time. His shoulders slumped and whatever confidence he had had dissipated. 

"Okay," he then mumbled in a defeated voice. I gently pulled him out through the doors, that to my surprise were still open. We stepped out onto the platform, businessmen rushing past us from all sounds. I felt momentarily disorientated, but then kept walking towards the terminal Harry would be leaving from. I nearly stopped in my tracks. Leaving. He'd actually be leaving me again. But I put the thought out of my mind, setting my jaw and continuing. I looked back every now and then, catching sight of Harry, who looked rather lost as he followed me, dragging his suitcase along beside him. I felt my heart tear to pieces every time I glanced at his no less than petrified expression. I sighed and kept at it, the terminal already looming above us. I wanted to reach the safety of indoors as quickly as possible, although Harry didn't seem to notice the rain slowly soaking us. I made a mental note to run as fast as I could on my way back home. I hadn't brought an umbrella.

Dodging a taxi, I dragged Harry into the large building, sighing in relief as the warmer air hit us. We walked towards an open space in the busy airport, shivering slightly because of the sudden temperature difference, although it was only slightly chilly outside. When we had finally found somewhere we didn't get constantly jostled by latecomers, I turned to Harry and gave him a sad smile. I felt the hopelessness threaten to drown me again as I looked at him, his suitcase next to him, a constant reminder of the fact that he was really about to leave me once again. Harry looked towards the floor, exhaling loudly. Then he looked up again, looking how I felt.

"I guess this is it?" he said in a low, weak voice. I nodded, moving towards him so I could wrap my arms around his waist. He immediately hugged me back, pulling me towards him. I let myself fully enjoy the feel of his arms around me, then answered him.

"I guess so," I whispered against his shoulder, feeling him nod as he swallowed loudly. He was trying to calm himself down.

"This happens too often," he stated hoarsely resting his chin on my shoulder. I sighed, knowing that I also thought that was true.

"I can't argue with that," I replied, falling silent afterwards. 

We stood there, holding each other in silence for what could have been seconds, minutes or hours. Every moment I spent with him seemed timeless. I could go too quickly at first, but then the next second, I'd be enjoying how the memories I shared with him took their time to unfold. It was confusing. I decided not to dwell on that thought, trying to enjoy his presence for what would be the last time in a while. I could tell he was doing the same, by the way he was taking deep breaths, burying his face in my shoulder and never decreasing the strength with which he held me. 

That was when the intercom decided to interrupt us. 

"Passengers of flight A341 to Seattle are kindly requested to make their way towards the gate."

The cool feminine voice sounded a little fuzzy, but we could hear her clearly nonetheless. Flight A34. To Seattle. That was his flight. And he was already cutting it fine. I pulled away from his embrace immediately, my eyebrows raised. 

"Harry, that's your flight. You're late, you need to get going now!" I fretted, feeling stressed. What if he missed it? He would be in all sorts of trouble. 

Harry took me into his arms again wordlessly. I could see the worry wrinkle that had appeared between his eyes. I sighed, not fighting against his hold on me. After all, I could understand exactly how he felt. 

The announcement over the intercom was repeated and I felt his arms tighten around me. It was like we were in the train again. He was frozen. His  muscles were painfully tense and as I looked  up at him, I saw the look of wild panic in his eyes. Feeling saddened, I put a hand on his cheek, forcing him to meet my gaze. As he held my stare, I realised he wasn't breathing normally. 

"Hey, hey, hey. Harry. Are you okay?" I asked, my worry for him evident. He shook his head, looking jittery as he tried to hug me properly again. But I withstood it, realising that there was no way to sugarcoat it.

"Harry, you can't avoid this," I whispered, my heart literally breaking. I wondered if I'd been secretly hoping we could both avoid this. Of course, to no avail. Harry's mindless murmuring brought me back to reality. 

"Yes- yes, I can," he rambled, licking his lips anxiously. I shook my head and watched him slowly give in to fear and hopelessness. He ducked his head, giving up.

"I can't- I can't do it again. I can't be alone again. I can't leave you. I can't do that to myself."

I realised my mouth was hanging slightly open. Quickly, I closed it and waited for him to say more. He ran a hand through his hair in a distressed fashion.

"I sound so selfish," he mumbled ashamedly. I shook my head quickly, leaning in to shut him up with a kiss. He didn't need to put any thoughts like that one into his head. 

I knew I had surprised him, but he kissed me back. I didn't care who saw us. It was just him and I in that moment, another one of our moments that lasted an infinity, but still, seconds. That was, until I pulled away.

"You're not selfish, you're human," I told him seriously. He laughed nervously.

"Am I supposed to be human, though?" he then muttered bitterly. 

"You are only human, you can't be any more or less than human, okay?" I stated. I wanted to get the message through to him. Finally, he nodded, looking less insecure of himself. 

"But I'm really sorry, you're still required to catch your flight and arrive in Seattle on time," I reminded him, caressing his cheek softly. He bit his lip regretfully, but nodded. 

"I'm proud of you," I smiled, pecking him on the lips. He avoided my eyes.

"But I can't do it alone. I know I can't. It's all too much now," he whispered, his gaze on the floor again. I thought for a second, resting my chin on his chest. Then I got an idea. However spontaneous it was, it was an idea. So I voiced the unexpected.

"What if I came with you?"

Harry met my eyes again.

 

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Aaaaaaand I'm back! Sorry, I've been gone for aaaaaages, but I've had really, really bad writer's block. It's been a nightmare. I think I'll be able to update this story a few times this week and next week, so I hope you don't mind that. Which reminds me - THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 11.1K READS! Seriously, I don't deserve that much, but thanks anyway x

Feel free to comment and favourite and stuff like that, all the love :)

Laura

P.S. I'm really sorry though, this chapter seems like a filler, in fact they all seem like fillers. I hope you guys actually like this story, I'm not a big fan of it haha.

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