We Broke Heaven

Survival isn't an option, it's a necessarily. Forget that and you die.
Everything I was every taught as a child until now. My sweet lullaby. But who will sing it to me.

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1. Demon Day

~The demon

Today is restless with fretting bodies. Nobody smiles. Nobody laughs. Their faces as dead as they knew they were soon to become. I pace through another mouldering shopping centre filled with a ridiculous quantity of people, the only one heading in the opposite direction to this heard. A heard that’s migrating, longing  to find a better place we all know will never exist, only ever in the comfort of our dreams. I pictured this shopping centre full of entertainment and the joy of spending money you earned on things you adored. No weeds through the cracks of the floor, every window a shattered mosaic, or the raided rooms that lost the privilege to be called once a shop. I struggled hard not to look at any of the faces around me, afraid that I would see them again in a way that would squeeze the sanity I had left in my tender heart, poured into a glass and drank by the devil himself. I’m jerked off my daze by a barged from a small boy, and just as majority of the kids utterly filthy and his wellbeing completely neglected. His eyes were soiled with tears and his face flushed in apprehension, too young to accept the loss of his family, too young to witness the wrath and terror of the clamorous monsters. Before I give him another pitiful glance he vanishes into the scornful swarm of people as the ringing of his screams drifts away, forgotten. I sneer at the merciless people around me and their lack of compassion. My life is come to a point where crying is now just a song in the background to me, a broken loop, a song that can give soulful emotion without the need of lyrics. The number one hit from miles around.

People migrate to be as far away as possible to be free from the demons grasps. Because today was the day another was released, today consequently many will fall. To take the chain off another odious piece of destruction. Our ancestors captured these beasts for our benefit, all their efforts shunned. Why the chains couldn’t be molten into their soul, left to burn in eternity so we could have the slightest light of happiness; I struggle to understand the logic in this scheme. The leaders believe freeing them will stop this pandemonium. Yet I continue to see more tears upon the sombre children, than I have had the water to bathe. We cannot share a world with demons, nor seek peace with them. But although we burn in the beds of our homes we still have the audacity to free the unforgiven.

I walk back towards the family I had left, knowing every step I take I will never step again. I sink into the sole of my shoe, the cold august air burned against my face matching how numb I was inside. To free a demon one must open his chamber. That one person will stand before an unyielding monster prepared to devour every mortal held responsible for his sanction. My family was given the key. My brother had stolen a tin of peaches kept at a military base; the only people I have left are all being penalized together for his ‘crime’. I laugh in disgust in an awkward loud voice disturbing the whispers of dismal beings. I kick an empty coke can to the bottom step of an escalator whispering under my breath ‘God save our queen’ I let the irony sieve through my lungs realising my pitiful anger wasn’t going to change a thing. My thoughts diverted, imagining the refreshing flavour of coke. A beverage I had never had before. Up the escalators onto the second floor was completely barren. Only the leftovers of the people who took refuge here remained. I studied this uninhabited area although it is irrelevant to me. Just to keep my mind occupied and to fill in the empty time I had left to waste. Rays of light beamed through the glass ceiling, I lifted my fingers allowing the light to dance in-between absorbing the little warmth it gave off. I stood taking in the sunshine that still came out to play. My heart sank at my brief concept of playing. Although I decided not to dwell on that. I continued to look up at the twinkling sunlight.

“It’s a bit late to catch a tan” a voice behind me echoed through the hall. It startled the last peace I had left; the birds flew away. I opened my eyes to see my brother standing before me. I sighed heavily, holding back my tears. His annoying smile and cocky haircut soothed me in a way. I was always jealous of his hazel eyes and how fit he was even though I did as much as he ever did, and I still could never compare. But for once in my life I liked the way he towered over me.

“Piss off” I attempted to smile, but my frown was too heavy.

He walked towards me and wrapped his arms around me, my head rested on his broad chest. His presence made me reflect on memories we spent surviving together, now that are only to disappear forever; like nothing. My brother hugged me often; he hugged me at all the times my moody teen age flushes made me detest human interaction. Right now all I needed was to be shown love. To loosen the knot that tugged against my neck.

Silence settled like snow. Stinging coldness, but warm satisfaction.

“You know you get that one tough kid that falls over but never cries?”

I look up at him confused hoping it wasn’t another joke of all the times. Not now.

“You’re exactly like that, but throughout your entire life. The way life relentlessly pushes you down, all the constant pain and suffering. But you act as if it didn’t scrape you, even though it’s already killed you twice inside. I guess it’s how we’ve all lasted this long, because we depend on your strength and how you just keep on going even if there’s no reward at the end of each battle. From such a little girl … my little sister…” He paused. I hated him so much, doesn’t he understand I didn’t want to feel anymore. Every word pierces me. The years I spent building my walls. In this single moment it’s all crashing down and my emotions are running through like hell fire.

“…But for the few moments we have left. It’s okay to let it go, scream at the world …it’s okay to cry” Like a lullaby to my ears, he whispered softly and the hurricanes unleashed.

My body took control and I couldn’t stop the tears from flooding my face. It hurt crying so hard into his chest, all that had been sealed inside was now free. I hated the world and what it’s put us through. I hated not being able to apologise for stealing someone’s food. I hated not crying when someone died before my eyes. I hated everything. His arms around me tightened for a few seconds but loosened; too quickly. He wiped the tears smudging the dirt around my face. The world had decided that this moment had to be torn. And the worse thing was,   I’m used it.

He looked into my eyes sternly but softly. I knew what his expression meant and I nodded hesitantly. He grabbed my hand and he led me away.

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