Flash diary comp: a year in the making

Apart of the competition for the year long diary. I am a normal teenager with a life different from all the others, read what it's all about.

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16. May 26, 2015 10:45pm

Today was kind of good. George kind of toyed with me in a flirty kind of way. He like twisted my body around and pretended it wasn't him even though he was the only one there. I really just want to walk up to him at times and just tell him everything I feel about him. I just want to grab him at the waist and hug him so tight like my favorite teddy bears. I want to grab his face on each side and smash my lips against his and kiss him so passionately. I sound absolutely nuts but this boy had me falling for him harder than I thought ever possible. He has this sort of power over me and he doesn't even know it. If he said to jump I wold ask how high and that's not good. I am losing control of myself and giving it to him. He doesn't even know he has this control over me so I just drift after him waiting for him to do something of ask me to do something. It's extremely pathetic but it's come to this, I don't know what's left of me anymore. I had orchestra rehearsal for my recital on Thursday and he was there before me practicing with the choir. I was walking behind his seat to sit and watch the choir and he looked up and said hey so I ruffled his hair lightly. I don't know if that was a smart move or not but I thought it was cute. Can't he just ask me out? Or kiss me and walk away? I just want to know how he feels about me and I will simply forget about it all if he doesn't feel the same way.

-N

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