Chic Happens

This is my online diary. Decided to move from an inner monologue to the internet, at the suggestion of a diary competition. I'll update whenever I can, although I can't promise that anything interesting will have happened. Wish me luck.

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7. 9th June 2015

Funfact: there are more germs on a keyboard than on a toilet seat.

Funfact: if you 'double dip' then you are increasing the amount of bacteria in the dip by at least five times.

 

On Saturday, I went to the burial of my Granddad. He died about two months ago, and was created a couple weeks after. But last week, we received the ashes, and my cousins buried him underneath a Christmas tree in their front garden. The tree is supposed to symbolise that Granddad spent the last few Christmases with them, especially when he was getting ill. I found it a little odd that they put it in the front garden, but I didn't mind. I didn't say a thing about it.

Everyone else did, though.

Today, I also got my laptop back, fixed. Which is nice. What isn't nice is that I found out today that the guy I like - and a guy I've known and been close with for three years now - isn't actually particularly popular in my friendship group. It came out today that they didn't really like him at all. Sure, Josh said he was alright - but after actually asking everyone for their thoughts, the general consensus was that he was a obnoxious jerk.

It was strange to hear. It really was. It felt a little odd because I talk about him a lot - I guess infatuation does that to a person - and they've never told me not to. So I asked the others how they felt, and it turned out that while they thought he was fine, he didn't make a great impression on them.

Of course, I then ran through every scenario I could in my head, trying to figure out what he'd done. But I can't think of many. Other than, on Thursdays when we used to be at Youth Club, I would hang out all night with him and not the others. (Which begs the question, is this my fault?)

I don't know how to feel.

A lot of me still likes him, and their thoughts on him really wouldn't change my feelings, or if I would ever want to date him (a lot of this is because he doesn't want to date me, so we're speaking in hypotheticals) but I do wonder what would happen if we did. Maybe I just shouldn't consider it.

In some other universe I am. In some parallel universe, we're together and it's okay because all my friends will like him in that one. There's a parallel universe for every eventuality, and in one of them, I know that every is okay between me and him. Sadly, it just isn't this one.

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