I need your love

Luke was her world. What will she do when it crumbles around her?


12. Addicted

Chrissy's POV

Ever since the park, Calum always tops around and finds a way to make me forget about Luke. There was something about him. He drove me crazy. I couldn't help smiling every time he texted me. Seeing the stars in his eyes made me melt. I think about him holding me all the time. Hell, I think about the way he looks at me and how he flashes those little smiles. He just gave me this feeling. Almost like I was falling for him. I needed his love. I liked him. Honestly, I think I love him.

I started seeing the group more often because I knew Calum would be there. When I walked in to the room, sat down at the table or even knocked on the door Calum would smile. Apparently Ashton filled the whole group in on what happened. Michael told the group what he saw us doing. Ashley was the first I told about my huge crush. She slept over that night. After I told her she squealed into a pillow and regained her complexion.

A few weeks after Ashton's party, Calum, the group and I were all at the beach. Michael and Ashley left. Leaving Ashton, Hanna, Calum and I. I had just come out of the water and sat in the sand next to Hanna. Of course Ashley made buy this fringed bikini. Hanna and I stood up when somebody picked me up by my waist. I screamed because I was actually having fun. I was set down on my feet. I turned to find Calum laughing. Ashton and Hanna were in the water and were also laughing. I will admit I was too laughing but not as much as everyone else. I playfully punched Calum's arm and he pretended like it hurt. He gave me the biggest puppy dog eyes ever. I grabbed his wrist and pulled him closer.

"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!" Hanna shrieked. We didn't even do anything! I turned around and Calum flashed me a smile. My heart beat grew faster as I smiled back. He spun me around by my hand a few times. Once he stopped he still had his hand in mine.

"Chrissy has anyone ever told you that you are the most beautiful girl in the universe." I couldn't believe Calum just said that. I blushed a little.

"So" He said still holding my hand as we walked towards the water, " Do you want to like ditch this, go back to the park......alone?" He kind of blushed.

"Yeah, get your shirt. I'll grab my phone and dress." I said. Hanna seemed pretty surprised that we were leaving but, Ashton obviously didn't care.

Calum and I walked to the park. We climbed to the flat roof of the parks platform cover. This was the highest spot at the park. Calum weaved his hand into mine. After a while Hanna called me. She wanted me at Ashton's alone immediately. She sounded pretty pissed. It was understandable because Calum and ditched beach afternoon for 3 hours.  Calum and stood up and jumped off the roof onto the play sets platform. I turned to leave when Calum grabbed my wrist. He pulled me into his arms. We stared into each others eyes. Calum smiled and kissed me. I felt a more than a spark. He pulled away and whispered in my ear, "You can be with me."

He held my hand the whole time we walked to Ashton's house. I came inside and Calum walked to Michael's. I was smiling. My heart racing. Hanna gave me a stern look and asked, "What the hell Chrissy......Oh my god what did you do?"

Aston came into the living room and sat on the couch. Hanna and I sat down as well. Ashton mimicked the way Hanna sat and twirled his hair like she did. I giggled a little. Ashton looked at me and jumped up, "Chrissy I figured it out!" He did a little victory dance.

"Ash, you tell me right now or so help me, I will make it so you will assume the fetal position!" Hanna said as Ash and I danced.

"CALUM ASKED HER OUT!" he screamed back like a girl.

I nodded.

Hanna's POV

"He did what?" I asked. Chrissy and Ashton were screaming and jumping like girls in the middle of the room. Ashton could tell I wasn't happy so he picked me up bridal style and spun me. We all sat down right as Chrissy got a phone call. She went out front and I saw Calum. I stood up and as I did Ashton held me by the waist. I pulled my way to the door and by the time I got there Calum and Chrissy were holding hands and walking down the street.

______Skip 3 Months_______

Calum's POV

Chrissy and I have been dating for exactly 3 Months, 2 Weeks, 6 Days. I was star struck. Chrissy had moved into my Town house. Chrissy hadn't seen Luke since that night but, the rest of us had. Luke didn't know that Chrissy and I have been dating. Last I saw Luke the doctors said he hadn't really eaten much in a few months. They also said that he doesn't sleep much, he doesn't leave his room where he sat in a corner and talked to himself, nor does he ever talk to anyone. I felt really bad, I mean my best friend was crazy because he caused his girlfriend to commit suicide. Thank God Ashton and Hanna found her.  Apparently the doctors thought he'd benefit from seeing the reason. The doctor called me and asked if Chrissy would go down to see him. Chrissy agreed reluctantly. We drove to the hospital where Luke was. When the doctor saw Chrissy he escorted her into Luke's room. I watched from the window.

Chrissy's POV

I walked into Luke's room where I found him in the corner. He never looked up. I slid my back down the wall and sat next to him. We sat in silence until he finally made eye contact with me and said, "I miss you."

My heart stopped. I looked at him and said, "Well stop. I'm finally happy."

He turned his head away from me. I stood up to leave when he said, "Who are you with?"

I decided to sit back down. I replied, "Calum."

"Oh, well then I'm sure you know about his past." Luke turned his head and stared at me. Just then Calum knocked on the window. He obviously could hear our conversation. He motioned me to leave the room, I didn't.

"What past?" I asked.

"You know." He said.

"No Luke, I don't."

"Oh well ask him."  Just then Luke stood up and opened the door. I rose and walked out. Luke shut the door behind me and the sat back down in the corner. I watched him for a minute. Luke pulled a big white piece of paper off the wall. The paper covered the whole wall. Underneath it was hundreds upon hundreds of groups of 5 tally marks on the wall. Luke lifted the small desk and pulled out a black sharpie and drew another tally mark. I added up the groups and found there were 2,595 tallies on this wall.


The next day Calum left and I decided to go see Luke again. When I got to the hospital, I once again was escorted Luke's room. The doctor said that I could look around while Luke was being tested for his mental state. I sat on the neatly made bed. The room was totally white. A small piece of white paper was poking out from under his pillow. I pulled it out and found Luke's handwriting and a few water droplet stains. I hesitantly opened the sloppily folded price of paper.

Every time I think of her

I make a tic on the wall

For only my eyes

For no one else's at all

The face of an angel who is burned in my mind

She won't be erased thought out time

Only one who is truly broken

Will never be fixed

I heard a door knob jiggle. I didn't care. Luke came into the room obviously angry. He never made eye contact with me. He sat down in the corner. His eyes were bloodshot and they had wet rings under them. He had been crying. His face was red. I watched him. Luke punched the wall making a few holes. He threw his head back in anger. The wholes in the wall caused the paper to peel. Luke stood up and ripped the paper off the wall completely. He rested his head on the wall and started to bite down on his bottom lip. He drove is teeth into his lip. Blood started to trickle down his chin. Luke dabbed his finger in the blood and drew two more tallies on the wall. He wiped the blood off of his face. Still resting his forehead on the marked wall, a few tears fell from his eyes. He slid down the wall and folded his legs to his chest. He leaned onto the wall and cried . I sat next to him. I rested my head on his shoulder. He sat up and wiped the tears from his face. My head was still resting on his shoulder. A piece of me still loved Luke.

"Did you ask him?" He asked.

"He wouldn't tell me what his so called past was."

"Do you want to know?"

I laced me fingers into Luke's hand. He held me like old times.

"Calum's past, well when we were in London for those 9 months, we went to a huge party. This girl, I think her name was Emma, approached Calum. The were both wasted. I had to stay sober because I had to drive back to the house. Anyways, Emma and Calum went into this back room, I followed. This room was full of like 30 people. In the center of this big circle was a pile of random pills. Emma said that everyone was taking 4 pills at a time and shooting them back with shots of vodka. Calum played along and he must have taken 20 or so pills, this Emma chick ate the pills like they were candy. Everyone was tripping and I sat back and watched. So Emma, Calum and like 10 others went out the back door. I went with Calum knowing that he is a party animal. Turns out there is this bridge with a raging river below. Calum said he wanted to jump in and Emma agreed. They both stood on the edge of this bridge. Calum, he pushed Emma. The rapids ended up taking her under.  We found her 6 miles up steam, she was pale and covered in maggot. Her eyes were open and they had on color. She was dead and Calum pushed her. A few days after Calum came of the high, he had realized what he did. He told us that nobody would remember him and that none of us should talk about that night. A few days before we came back to Australia he said, Dead Girls Can't Speak."

Once Luke finished I felt my eyes fill with tears. I cried into his shoulder. Luke wrapped his arms around me and rested his head on mine. I felt safe. Luke told me everything would be okay. I looked up at him and he smiled a little. I wiped to tears from my eyes and smiled too. He leaned down and kissed me. I felt like I was home again. He pulled back and looked at me.

I looked at the wall and back at him. Luke looked up and looked at me. "The wall is ab-"

I cut him off, "Me, each time you think of me you mark the wall. I know." There was lump in my throat.

"I want to get out of here, I want to be able to see you because I-"

"I love you too Luke." I said while my eyes started to water.

We sat in the corner all snuggled up to each other. It was around 5:30 pm. I had been with Luke since 8:45am. I still loved him but, Calum, I still loved him.





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