Now not long ago right after I joined the Army I met a woman. A woman I wasn't particularly intimidated by which was rare. I found her super fucking sexy but didn't sweat or stutter around her like I did around 100% of the women I've been interested in my life. She was Lisa's little sister. She was a little bit of a nerd from what I could tell and she was interested in a guy who used to be linked up to our crew till we had toss his bitch ass down some steps for trying make a move on Lisa. Just kidding eventually he just left because of the tension.
Her name was Anna. Now Anna whom I dubbed 'Midget' because I thought of her more as a sister and because she was interested in the douche bag we wanted to throw down several flights of metro stairs. She was graduating from high school and considering the military so Lisa asked me to talk to her. I pretty much tried to talk her into joining the Army but from the title of this chapter you already know who she picked.
Anyway after these fiascos with all these women, Kate and Brie I needed an outlet. Someone that wasn't hard to talk to but a woman and would understand so I asked the Midget Marine out on a date when she made her way back to my area. We had been talking a little bit on and off before and half way through my deployment. Mainly about military stuff. I even sent her mail while she was in Bootcamp address from Bootydaddy just so her Drill Instructors would give her shit for it! I think this had to be the only time I pursued anybody without fear. Not because I knew she would say yeah but even if she said no we would still be hommies. Plus Lisa kept hinting saying Anna hard a crush on me.
Now for picture wise she’s is a short little thing, she’s beautiful like her sister but looks a lil more innocent. She looked a little rough but a good rough not like a female UFC fighter but like Lisa 'Left Eye' Lopez rough. Long curly black hair, buttercream skin, toned body and her eyes could tell you a lie and you would still think they were honest. I know that sound weird it’s just that I could never read her what so ever.
Anyway, I drove out to West Bubbafuck to pick her up from her mother's place. She hopped in the car with her Steeler's Gear on. Now I am a Raiders fan so you know the beef started immediately.
"Booooooo, Bum ass Steelers!"
"Boo your Raiders. Who has the better record Jet?"
She had me this time. We've been going through a very rough patch these last 10 years. We spent the next ten minutes snapping on each others football teams laughing it up.
"Anyway How is it in Marine land?"
"It's alright. How is it in Army land?
"I hate it, I hate my unit, I hate my leaders, can't wait till my contract is up!"
"Why not just transfer?
"Too many cliques. Too many people got screwed over in Afghanistan by the 'Authority', their like the Damn NWO in my Battalion and a transfer wouldn’t do me justice because I’m still in school."
"That sucks. What happened in Afghanistan?"
"Asses were handing out Article 15’s for not wearing our soft caps in a no cap zone type shit!"
"We have Officers like that too. Tried to get me for being late to formation on a snow day. Wasn't even my fault! Then ya boys pulled me over for going 2 miles of the Limit." She mocked the fact I am a Military Police Officer.
This Military mumbo jumbo all the way until we got to the Cheese Cake Factory. We spoke about our military careers some more and our shitty relationships. Then some douchebag behind our table proposed to his Girlfriend and began tonging each other’s tonsils. I mocked sticking my tongues out Frenching the air like the scene from the exorcist making Anna laugh.
"Kind of cheesy! At a cheesecake factory. Really!"
"That just made me sick, and he's all hairy look at his neck!"
We both began laughing because the guys neck did look like he had Chewbacca in his blood.
"Yeah, I wonder when Mark and my sister will do that."
"Yea, I spoke to Mark and he told me she don't believe in marriage."
"Yeah, Ya mom taught yall not to believe in it for some God awful reason.
"That’s bull. She didn’t say that."
We then got on the subject of Mark and Lisa's three years relationship. I know you're probably like what does any of this have to do with anything. I thought this book was "The Chronicles of Jet" not the “Well it does and it doesn't. Point of the matter is this happens to be the most fluid date I’ve had to this date. Consistent conversation, Not as awkward or feeling like a third wheel. No bad signs at all. Just Normal. I've never had this. Not once.
After dinner we ran across the street and bought tickets to see "Tom Cruise by Tom Cruise starring Tom Cruise written by Tom Cruise”. We sat down and began speaking on more military stuff. She then informed me she would be trying to go overseas for something called MSG. Her heart was set on this and mine was set on her. If she goes to another country that’s a done deal if the relationship get any were. I'll lose my chances with her. Crap why'd she have to pick the Marines!
We then entered the theatre. Now I've been on movie dates before where my date sat away from me and even in a different row. So I approached this cautiously and awkwardly but good thing she sat next to me. I checked the arms, just in case make-a-move moment. They don't adjust. That made it even more awkward because they were the wooden desk kind of seat. A cock block if you will. No cuddling or Arm around the shoulder. No human to human contact! No nothing! Didn't stop me from trying though.
So midway through the movie I noticed she leaned more into my direction placing her feet onto the chair claiming she was cold. If the arm rest weren't fucking cutting boards she would be touching me making my moves on her so much easier. So I stretch up in cliché fashion and placed my arm around her shoulder. This would be great if the fucking arm rest wasn't hard as hell poking into my ribs. I tried to wrap my arm whole around her but the armrest was too wide and only gave me enough room to her cup shoulder. Eventually she leaned in more giving me some more arm length. I wrapped my arm around her frame wait for a few. I couldn't believe this was happening. I wanted to take this further so I started reaching for her hand which was placed on her thigh and somehow my hand slipped and ended up on her toned firm ass. All I could only picture her in her Marine Cams pulling a Bowie knife from her boot and slitting my throat or putting me in arm bar and making me tap but none of this happened. The Marine allowed it. Still wasn't a base hit but it was something. So I eventually began caressing her thigh to her butt cheek with my fingers. Trying to get a reaction of some sort. I looked at her and she seemed more into the movie than me, then BAM.
The movie ended. You could imagine my frustrations but it was ok. I might get a good night kiss or a second date. Whelp that didn't happen but something did. More talking and joking around which I enjoyed. Basically talking about how action movies suck now that were both trained killers. I dropped her at her home and that was the date. I would say it was a win more than anything. I could have walked her to the door and tried kissed her. But I couldn’t stop being a chicken and made the first move but even with how non-nervous she made me that thought made me nervous. Yet, I still chalk this date up as a win.
I went home and for the next 24 hours I couldn't stop thinking about her and how normal the date was. How there wasn't much awkwardness. It couldn’t of been because I've known her for so long but I've known Tory for damn near 10 years at that moment and going to the movies with her or hanging at her house was always awkward even when we used to chill out often. This got me thinking of every date I've ever had and questioning my judgment. Not that I hadn't done that before but I scrutinized it like it wasn't even my business condemning everything I've ever done. My eyes were opening.
Two days later she called me and asked if I was beat for another date. Now it was on! She was leaving the day after and the last person she chooses to hang out with is my nerdy ass. I was stoked. This has to be my first back to back date. So we decided to go to the Gun Range seeing she never fired a pistol and she was going to need to learn how if she was going to do MSG. The date went even smoother then before. Even go to "show" her how to hold to hold and fire the pistol while positioning myself behind her in a spooning fashion. Do you know how hard it was no to get an erection standing behind her. By the way for her to be a Marine she was horrid when it came to shooting that pistol. She hit the hostage right in the forehead but before we left I helped her get a decent shot.
We left and went to go eat at some special burger place. We began talking more and more about her and MSG. I began to get super depressed. I didn’t want her to go. I was worried about her meeting some suave Italian dude and sweeping her off her feet. I felt if I let her go that'll be the end of my chances.
"You know we are gonna miss you if you go overseas." I said we but what I really meant was I because I missed her during her boot camp and my deployment just not in this current sense.
"I know. You know what Jet after I get some time off there I could fly you out to visit me."
Hearing this I did a back flip-kip-up- James brown- jump-into-a-spit... In my mind. I was so happy I couldn’t help grinning because she said it like she meant it.
"Definitely! Fly you out and we could go exploring and stuff together."
Now I was really happy but that only lasted but so long. She got sick and needed to go home because she was getting the bubble guts. Fuck there goes my chances to kiss her. Last thing I needed to do was try to kiss her and shit vomits on me or shits herself yeah that would make for a nice memory. I have the worst luck it seems.
Later found out she had allergy to the oil they cook the burgers in. So she left back to her home station and I back to my mom’s house at the time. I was super excited but scared at the same time. I knew the price of me not pulling a move on her. That letting her go and without "claiming" her wouldn't guarantee me those trips. Damn me for being so afraid of women.
Looking at the bright side I was happy that our second date went normal too aside from the sickness and almost vomiting, this date drove the nail home for me. I had been putting up with so much shit because of my self-esteem issues thus allowing these crazy, unbalanced, unstable women pull me in control and manipulate me. Just so I could get some boob cuddles in the process, never again. The manipulating that is. Booby cuddles is forever. If I learned anything from my dates with Anna is that settling for shit when I can have gold is bad and whatever I choose to put up with is all my fault. Never again! NEVER AGAIN!
As for Anna turns out she's not really the text a dude back type or an internet skype type so keeping up with her was harder than I expected. Plus her schedule was hectic. I tried all the way up into Valentine ’s Day even sent her something suggested by Lisa but never heard back from her at all. That made me sad but long as she was happy I didn’t care about my feelings. Much.