So when you have today - Justin hills/Kellin Quinn

Kellin had always told me that when I had today, I should say all that I had to say. And now when I have the two guys I've fallen hopelessly in love with I don't know what to say anymore.


21. So sick of playing I don't want this anymore - Chapter 21

Justin's POV

After the concert Kellin ran off to look for Rose and I was greeted with a pair of lips on mine. Not the ones I wanted though. Amanda was all over me but all I could think about was Rose.

Later on while me, Gabe, Jesse, Amanda and Jack were sitting on our bus, Kellin walks on and you could clearly see he was crying.

"Kellin, man. What's the matter?" Jesse and.

"Rose left." He tells us.

"What do you mean she left?" I ask.

He glares at me and hands is each a note with our name on it. I automatically identify Rose's hand writing.

I open the folded piece of paper laying in my hands and take a deep breath.

Dear Justin,

So hi. I'm writing this because I wanted to tell you that I'm still in love with you. You're perfect and so is everything about you. Your smile, your laugh, just everything. I couldn't have asked for anyone better. I was, and still am hopelessly in love with you. But with everything that's happened I can tell you obviously don't feel the same. You've moved on and I'm gonna be honest here, you destroyed me. You were the only thing keeping me sane, but you don't care anymore.

I beg that you never forget what we had. Never forget about us, because that would be the death of me. Memories are the only thing that's keeping me holding on and I don't ever want to let go.

I was just messing everything up by staying on tour and bothering you all. So I'm not lying when I tell you that you were my world, I would've and probably still will do anything for you. I basically just wanted to apologize. Apologize for not doing this in person but I didn't want anyone to stop me from leaving. I also wanted to apologize for not being good enough for you. I hope whatever happens with you guys, you're happy and I'm sorry for messing everything up.

I love you Justin, forever and always


You could see tear stains on the paper but I'm not sure who's they were, mine or Rose's. I was crying so hard. Probably at the fact that Rose thought this was her fault. She thought she wasn't good enough. She thought I was over her, and the funniest part, she thought I was happy without her. She said she still loved me, and honestly, I still loved her more than anything. But now she's gone and were on tour for another 3 months and I'll never get to show her how much I love her.

Rose is my everything and I need to figure out a way to prove it.

Kellin's POV

I walked to my bunk and laid down, thinking about everything. I held my note from Rose close to my chest and a few years time down my cheeks. I held the letter up and read it over again for about the fifth time.


Wow. That's all I really need to say. You've been here through it all. And really, I can't thank you enough. In the end, you're my best friend and I'm glad I could call you that. It's an honor.

You're so fucking perfect and you'll always be my number one. I know this sounds so childish but after spending so much time with you I've just realized how much you mean to me. I also know that these are just empty words but they mean everything. Like you always say, this could mean everything or nothing at all, and I hope this means something to you.

Kellin Quinn Bostwick, I'm in love with you. It's terrible I know. But I love you and everything there is. I know after everything that happened love seems like a foreign feeling but I swear, you're special.

So I hate that I'm doing this over letter instead of in person, but I'm going to have to say goodbye. I really need to get off this tour, and just be by myself for a while. Who knows what'll come out of it.

I love you Kellin, and I hope to see you after tour. Don't you ever forget about me.

Keep your hopes up high and your head down low. I love you.


My heart shatters at the thought she thinks I could ever forget about her.

I love you too, Alexandria Jaiden Rose.

Rose's POV

I was woken up by a hand on my shoulder. It was the teenage girl beside me telling me we were about to land. Over the 6 hour flight, me and the girl beside me had made a friendship.

"So were are you staying?" I ask her and she shrugs.

"I have enough money to get a hotel room for a few days." Juliet says and I shake my head.

"Come stay with me. I live alone and wouldn't mind some company." I tell her.

She widens her eyes. "I couldn't possibly-"

"You're staying, that's final." I tell her softly and smile.

"Wow, I never thought I'd be staying with my idol." She says and I laugh.

You see, Juliet has ran away from her house and decided to run to San Diego for some reason. Her parents were extremely judgmental. They didn't accept the music she played and listened to, her style or sexuality. And that was not one bit okay. She told me that she was a lesbian and she thought I'd judge her. That made me laugh, but also ofended me a bit. She got sick of always being judged, bought a plane ticket and here we are.

The plane lands and we gather our shit, walking off the plane. "So, just let me text Tay and tell her I made it okay." I tell her and she nods.

"Thank you so much Rose." She says.

"Its really no problem." I tell her, turning my phone on.

I groan and see so many missed texts and calls I dismiss them and text Tay and Kells, telling them I was home. We hailed a taxi and drove back to my house. We got there and I helped her with all her stuff. My house was fairly large, 4 bedroom, 3 bathrooms, I had a game room, movie room, a pool, a bar type thing, a music room and a gym.

"Make yourself at home, anything you wanna do, feel free. This is your house now. Oh, there probably isn't much food here so we'll need to go out and get some tomorrow." I tell her and she nods.

"This really means everything to me." She tells me and I smile.

"I'm just glad I could help."

Me and Juliet had a little girls night. We did each others hair and makeup, nails and we danced around and sung to whatever CDs I had. Its been forever since I've done something like this, and it really got my mind off things.

I think this is a start to a great friendship.

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