I knock on Jace's door; I can hear music blasting through. It's eight o'clock; Wendy, the other instructor, sent me to tell him to turn it down. Wendy's thirty something; she's here to make sure Jace can control the other seven students (including me), along with Chloe, a twenty something woman, who doesn't say much. I don't really like Wendy; she's too strict and bossy ...
I knock again; Jace doesn't answer. I give up and push open the door.
"Jace! Come on, Wendy wants the music off - Jack?" My heart stops; Jack freezes where he is on the bed. He sits up and swears.
"What the - Fuck! What did you do with Jace?" He's on his feet in seconds, tugging me into the room. I swear and pull away from him quickly. Even if we said we were girlfriend and boyfriend, there's no way I'm going to be all hugs and kisses when I find him in my instructor's room ...
He shuts the door and hits the music off. He tries to reach out for me, but I back up further. Jack ... is ... here ... Oh shit.
"Maia - Please! Just hear me out, ok?" I shake my head and try to run to the door but he gets there before me. His eyes beg for me to listen; I stumble away from him.
"Where's Jace?" I demand. He scowls.
"Shh! They'll hear you!" He looks around desperately and then at his music. He plays it again but turns it down slightly so it just about covers up our talking. "Come 'ere." He beckons me to go near him; I swear and give him an evil glare. He stops taking steps towards me, and starts to beg. "Please! You've got to understand that Wendy and Chloe can't find out! They'll tell Mason and he'll fire me! ... Don't tell the the other students either please!"
"Jack? What's going on? How'd you get here?" He winces and tries to step closer. I grab Jace's deodorant from the cabinet beside me, and hold it up in warning. He flinches and steps away.
"Ok, you can't tell anybody but - I - ... Maia ... Please - ... Please, can I hold you as I talk?" I hesitate, before stepping forwards, clutching onto the deodorant just in case. He wraps me into his arms; I burrow my head into his neck. "I - I'm Jace ..." What?
I try to pull away, but he holds me tight, wrestling me into another hug. "I didn't mean for you to be my student I just - I just thought it'd be another 'Maia' girl and - well, I've been working at the place ever since I was fifteen and when I was fifteen, I was embarrassed to be known as the boy who snowboards as a hobby, so I made up a name and a fake person to be and I - Please don't hate me. I like you Maia, I really do, and I don't want this little thing to tear us apart ..." My heart stops beating for a second; I stop fighting him. The words sink in.
Jace is Jack.
Jack is Jace.
They're the same person ...
"You can't be!" I wiggle free and he lets me go. "Jace looks completely different to you -" He takes my hand and pulls me to the bathroom. I follow, curiously. I watch as he pulls out contact lenses that have different colours. I realise his hair has been dyed a dirty blonde like Jace's, not his normal dark brown scruffy mess. There's even foundation to make his skin look pinker than normal ...
I swear fluently.
"So when I asked for Jace's number and Jace gave me his number the next day ..."
"It was me." He mumbles quietly.
"And when you took me snowboarding and mentioned that Jace wouldn't mind ..."
"All the snowboarding lessons?"
"And the - the -"
"It's all me. I'm sorry ..." My legs go weak and jelly like; I slump against wall. Jack/Jace steps forwards worriedly and holds a hand out. "Maia? You don't hate me do you?" I dampen my lips.
My brother is Jace. I love my brother yet I've been flirting with Jace. He's been here all this time ... Oh my god ...
"Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I whimper. He pulls me into his chest; I lean against him heavily.
"I - I was ... I - I just couldn't bring myself to it ... I knew you'd get mad with me ..." He holds me tight as there's suddenly someone knocking on the door.
"Jace! Turn your music off! Didn't Maia tell you? Everyone's trying to sleep!" Jack/Jace winces and looks down at me.
"Stay with me tonight?" He whispers. I should refuse, but my numb body is too exhausted and confused to walk back to my room without the roommates wanting to know what's going on, so I just dip my head in agreement. He smiles and runs a hand through my hair. It's quiet as I try to gather my thoughts.
"Jace! Don't make me come in there!" Jack swears and pulls away. He pulls me into the bedroom and hits off the music.
"Night Wendy!" He snaps. Wendy sighs but disappears. Jack turns and his face softens. He pulls me towards the bed; my heart flips even in it's states. He lays down, and I lay down beside him. He smiles and gently brushes my hair out of my face. His lips are centimeters away from mine; he doesn't look proud with my silence. "You hate me, don't you?" His breath is warm on my face; my dream pops into my head. The sudden urge to kiss him, although the lie I just discovered still hurts, takes over me. I know it's stupid when I move my head forwards and kiss his lips. He stiffens, shocked, before smirking and relaxing into me. His arms slide around and pull me into his chest. I break the kiss almost instantly and cuddle into his chest. He doesn't mind and holds me close. Somehow, I fall asleep.
The rest of the week wasn't as awkward as I expected. We acted like normal Jace and Maia in the daytime, snowboarding and racing the others, but at night, I was with Jack. My Jack. The one I can sit and watch disney movies with; the one who likes to cuddle as we clutch hot chocolate; the one that is mine. He was two separate people; I love both sides of him. I'm struggling to see how he can lead this double life when I can hardly live one normal life ...
The girls in my room seem weirdly jealous of me when I disappear at seven to go and cuddle with Jack. They see me disappearing into Jace's room; they threaten to tell Chloe or Wendy if I don't share him in the day (childish, I know right), and when I told Jack, he laughed and kissed me until I gave up warning him about his job being taken away.
We're now at home; eating dinner. We got back under an hour ago; I've never been sadder to leave a holiday like Snowboarding before. Mum demanded to hear every little detail about the trip and I told her everything (apart from Jack and Jace). The table doesn't go quiet once; excited chatter fills the house. Jack sits my right; his hand brushes against mine, not quite trusting himself to take it with Mum and Stan in the room. I don't mind though and continue to eat.
After dinner, I manage to escape back to my room. I quickly get changed into my night clothes and duck into the toilet to do my teeth. As I try to creep back, arms wrap around me and pull me into their room. I know who it is without having to look at them.
I grin as he pulls me into his arms and kicks the door shut.
"Oh wow." I tease. "Shutting the door as well? How lucky do you think you're gonna be?" He laughs and leans his forehead against mine. His lips fall to mine; he draws closer.
"Hopefully, very lucky." I grin as he leans forwards and presses his mouth to mine. His lips are soft and careful at first; his arms slide around my waist and pulls me into him. I wrap my arms around his neck, knowing how dangerous this is. If Stan or Mum happens to walk in while we're kissing, we're both screwed ...
Neither one of us pulls back; he tries to grow closer but we both stumble. The wall presses against my back suddenly; he whimpers and leans into me. His hands start to grab at my waist, pulling me closer. They run up and down my back; his lips lean against mine passionately. I slide my hands into his hair and gently tug at it. He grunts and I whimper a little. His hands start to duck a little lower; my breath hitches in my throat as his hands slide over my thighs and then my bum. I groan as he squeezes; his hands gently start to rub at my thighs.
His lips are fast and desperate against my own; they're suddenly sliding to my neck and he begins to kiss around until he finds my sweet spot. I whimper against him. My legs turn to jelly; my head spins with lust.
"Jack ..." I mumble. He grunts and his lips graze my neck. I struggle to keep myself up with my jelly legs and cling tighter onto him, using the wall and his lips to keep me upright. "Jack .."
"Maia ..." He whimpers back. "Stay with me tonight ..."
"I can't ..." He stops rubbing against my thighs and kissing my neck; he pulls me in for a hug.
He hugs me. Hugs me. I don't hesitate. I wrap my arms around him and hold him tighter as moves his lips to my shoulder. He begins to kiss at my top.
"Jack ... Stay with me ..." I plead. He hesitates and then nods his head.
"Stan starts work at ten and Lauren starts work at eight. We need to be gone by then ..." He whispers. I nod.
"We will." He promises. I hesitate and then nod. I glance over my shoulder and at his door. He follows my gaze, aware of the footsteps outside. Mum ...
"Maia?" She yells. "Come on! Get into bed!" I look back at Jack and try to plead him with my eyes not to leave me. He takes my face and kisses my lips gently. I melt into them. "MAIA!" He draws away and gently pushes me towards the door.
"I'll join you in a minute ..." He whispers. I nod and slip out of the room. Luckily, mum's glaring into my room so I manage to duck down the stairs and then re-enact myself coming up them.
"Ok, ok." I moan, rubbing my eyes. "I'm coming." Mum pivots with speed, and gives me a surprised look. Her expression changes into a little sigh as she gives me a quick kiss on the forehead.
"Night Maia." She says, disappearing into her room. I watch her go, and glance over at Jack's door, before sliding into my room.
Half way through the night he joins me, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me closer. I snuggle closer and we fall asleep together.