I walked a long, treacherous, .7 miles back to the RV park. It might not be long, but I haven't worked out in awhile. Something I probably should do considering when I come back I can't be in bad shape.
Once the door was opened loud roars of screams and laughter emitted in the air. It was like being hit in the face with a brick.
I made my way in the RV to see no one. They must be in the back media room.
"I'm back!" I yelled.
They couldn't hear me so I just walked towards the music but went no further, rather I just went to the bunks and laid down.
I brought the pillows over my head and was about to fall asleep to the silence I created. That was until someone started tickling my exposed stomach.
"Stop!" I whined.
"No get up." I heard that voice that I've been missing for weeks now.
"BRENT!" I squealed throwing the pillow from my face away from me, hitting Brenton in the process.
"Woah. Okay I know that you hate me but did you really have to hit my face with a pillow?" He asked throwing the pillow back at my face.
I gently put it to the side and got down from the bunk.
I smiled widely looking up at him before hugging him tightly. Him embracing me just as tightly.
"I missed you so much." I breathed, exhaling my breath and inhaling his cologne.
"Eh, I guess I missed you too." He shrugged while still hugging me.
"Whatever." I laughed pulling away to look at him again.
"How's my little sister." Him emphatic the word sister made me feel happy.
I've never had an older brother and I always thought it would be cool. Some to have jokes with, like more grown up jokes unlike the "knock knock." "Who's there" "cheese" like I have Matthew who just finds them so hilarious. Or someone I can cry to on a sad day. Or talk about life with. Share memories too, even though we couldn't go too far back we still have had some great times.
"Pretty good, pretty good. A little stressed but other than that I'm good... good." The awkwardness in my tone was quite evident considering I didn't now how to respond. It was only awkward because I was trying to sum up the good and bad, the chaotic and calm, so in best terminology I could think of I was 'good'.
Not great, but not bad, so good.
"Living the rock stars dream I would think you would have had more of a reaction." He laughed.
"Well more like a roadies dream kinda thing. I'm not the one on stage." I mumbled lightly.
"Yeah but your practically famous." He more so suggested in a questioning tone.
"Famous as "5SOS's BAE's not as Fio." My mumbles a bit louder this time.
"Cheer up sport, stop feeling so cruddy. I'm here, and I'm not 5SOS's BAE. How do you think I feel." He pouted.
"You're right, you're right. You're now 5SOS's BAE's friend." I laughed.
This whole not being my own person had kinda always bothered me, but I can't just tell Luke. I can only tell him I don't want help, but I can just say "I don't like that your fame takes away from my life as a human being".
Brenton just laughed and pulled me out of the bunk room to the kitchen where there was a card with a balloon attached to it on the table.
He handed me the card and balloon and told me to open it.
Inside was a white thin paper saying round trip to my hometown.
I was happy, but confused. I guess my face showed it because Brenton replied with "I all want you to come home for a week. We all do." He said coming up to me and looking at the ticket too. A big smile grew as he looked between the ticket and me.
"I would love to." My goofy grin showing through, wrapping my arms around him.
"Thank you, Brent." I breathed. I was happy to have a break.
"Good, cause we leave in two days."
"Brent! It takes that long to pack." I shrieked.
"You have all of us to help."
"The boys and girls already know?" I questioned.
"The girls do, the guys don't."
Out of all the things that I could have encountered today, I just don't want to tell my boyfriend that I'm going to leave. He might take it as its his fault, with all that's happened lately. But I would never, I just want to go home an get in shape with my boys. Even if I have to leave my boy.
"I'll tell them later, but I want to spend as much time with all of them as I can." I said, more so trying to convince myself rather than just saying a statement.
"You should probably spend as much time with them as you can, you'll be gone for a whole week!" He said, a bit of sarcasm coming through.
"I love them, okay!" I shot back, my voice a bit weary at the word love. Even if those words have left my mouth before, and even though I wasn't directly talking about Luke my body still cringed.
"I'll pack your stuff, you just go and have fun."
==========two days later========
"I'm ready to be home." I cried. A lot has happened these two days and honestly all I want is to go home. For I don't know how long.