I dont care

''Luke.. M-my brother.'' I stuttered as the blonde boys hands traveled down my waist. ''I don't care about your brother...'' His words rolled of his tongue sending shivers down my spine. I couldn't bare it any longer.. Our lips brushed against each others before he was ripped off me, stood there was non other than my furious brother his self..


39. 40

Jenna's POV

''YOU WHAT!?'' She screeched jumping up off the cough and I flinched at her reaction.

''I-i broke up wi-''

''I know what you said! J-just! Oh my god! Jenna he's about to go on stage and he's breaking! Right, come on.'' She started dragging me downstairs to the arena across the street. ''Claire! Claire n-no!'' I stuttered trying to avoid people staring at me because I was crying. Why did I fucking dump him I'm such an idiot.

''Jenna, you need to watch. Look.'' Nobody bothered stopping us since they already knew who we were, the boys were already on stage talking while Luke just stood facing down not doing much but occasionally scanning the arena with his glossy eyes. Oh my god what have I done. ''And now we're going to sing The Only Reason!'' Michael grinned into the mic and Luke started playing his guitar.

''Woahhhh, woahhh.''

Luke's voice came out raspy and sad and I frowned more tears welling up. As his eyes darted around I saw another tear fall down his face, I don't think he noticed me yet, I mean would he want to after what I have just done? I'm such a bitch. I hate me too. Everybody hates me.

As Michael was singing his first part I saw Luke getting more and more worked up until he had too sing again. He missed the first few words and his guitar playing went a bit out of time until he caught up again.

The crossed wires, making us tired- His eye caught mine and his singing stopped

''I'm sorry...'' He hung his head low and you could hear his sobs and all I wanted to do was run up onto stage... Maybe I could try. I think the other boys were hesitating to carry on or not I tried to push past them but they wouldn't let me. ''Let me go to him!'' I sobbed my voice turning more weaker and weaker.

The lights on the stage turned off and the curtains snatched closed all I heard the audience start to cry and ask what was going on.

This is all my fault. I need to get out of here. And fast. I ran and ran back to my hotel room making sure nobody was following me; Luke's sobs were still circling through my mind and that's all I could hear. JUST GET AWAY!

I slammed the door shut behind me and locked myself in the room and then in the bathroom. I could feel my self getting more and more upset each time I took a breath or thought of Luke.

His smile,

his face,

his eyes,

his laugh,

his voice,

his cries.

That's it. I've had enough I can't deal with this anymore, knowing that I've hurt a person I love I need to make myself feel the pain. Something sharp. Something sharp. No Jenna don't. Don't do this too yourself you're just going to make things worse. Not if I don't tell anybody about this or let anybody see or know... No! No! STOP! DO IT!

I snapped the razor and picked up the sharp metal edge of the blade careful not to cut my thumbs. Oh who cares. I closed my eyes taking two deep breaths before letting the warm sticky blood pour out down my arm. I let out a cry and I heard pounding on the door. ''Jenna! Jenna! Let me in!'' My brothers startled voice spoke. Shit, shit! Jenna do something!

''Leave me alone!'' I numbly spoke trying to stop the blood from flowing. Find something, find something! ''No! Let me in! Jenna! Please Jen!'' Ashton's voice was getting more worried by the second. ''A-ashton!'' I sobbed feeling really tired, no, no. I need help, I need help!

''Ashton! Help!'' I cried and I heard a massive crash before I just managed to open the lock on the door and two people ran through, Ashton and Michael.

''Jenna.'' Michael gasped his colour draining from his face as my brother ran besides me. ''I'm sorry.'' I whispered before blacking out....

Luke's POV (sorry for the language used in this.)

I'm such a dick, such a dick, fuck me! Why didn't I just believe her? I mean I did! I just didn't want to let her win the argument, stupid huh? More like selfish. But knowing about what just happened I can't cope anymore.

''Calm down lad, you'll make up by tomorrow okay, don't worry.'' Calum tried to calm me down. ''But I'm such a fucked up person Cal! I can't believe I even listened to the tabs! They're assholes!'' I angrily threw the pillow across the dressing room and tried not to let tears fall.

''Luke, calm down dude, it will be okay, okay.'' Calum put his hand on my shoulder.

I didn't really know how to respond to that. I must seem like some little girl crying like this but I don't care, I'm so fucking messed up, I just need to be with Jenna.

Jenna's POV

''Wha- where?'' I sat up. ''Jenna, stay laid down.'' Michael? Yeah Michael's soft voice spoke and I laid my head back onto the fluffy pillow. Where am I? In a hotel? Wait... Now I remember what happened. I looked around and saw my brother pacing anxiously on his phone. He turned towards me with sorrow filling his eyes and walked out onto the balcony.

''W-who's he talking to?'' I slowly sat up and Micheal sighed.

''Calum and Claire.''

''Is Luke okay?''

Michael paused for a moment. ''Never mind Luke for now, are you okay?''

''Y-yeah I'm fine.. I'm sorry Mikey.'' I sighed and he pulled me in for a hug. ''It's fine, don't worry about it, if you ever want to talk I'm here, okay.'' He whispered and I smiled weakly. ''Thanks, and I know, I really want Luke..'' I sadly looked down and Ashton walked back inside standing at the end of the couch with... With.. Something in his eyes I couldn't describe. ''W-why did you hurt yourself?'' I knew Ashton had a bad past with this. Like self harming and stuff.


''Because of what happened with Luke?'' He cut me off. ''It was my fault..'' I cleared my throat and Ash bent down next to me. ''Don't say that, it was none of your fault.'' He hugged me tightly and I broke down. ''I-i want Luke back Ash.'' I sobbed and Michael's hand rubbed my shoulder lightly like something was wrong.

''W-where is Luke?'' I saw the two look at each other nervously. ''He locked himself in his room and wont come out..'' Ashton sighed. ''A-and Claire?''

''She's with Calum, they're trying to get him too come out..''

''So I guess he doesn't want to s-see me?''

''No! No! Jenna he does want to see you, in fact he's the only person he wants to see!'' Michael exclaimed.

''I need too go see him.'' I was about to stand up but the two boys stopped me. ''Jen, you're too weak you need sleep.'' Ashton kissed my head and stood up. ''What? What! No!'' I panicked. ''Ashton please!'' I begged and he sighed. ''Jenna we'll just see him in the morning okay.''

From then on I knew something wasn't right...



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