CHAPTER FIFTY FIVE
"Good god that was amazing." Janice says stretching as she attempts to get into the driver's seat.
After a well deserved meal at a little eatery we had found, we had gathered the strength to finish this journey once and for all.
"Those potatoes." I say with a smile, "No wonder Niall always gains weight whenever he comes to Ireland."
"I'd eat them for every bloody meal."
Janice drives smoothly, worried that I was much too tired to continue driving tonight. Although we were both tired, we weren't that far. We weren't that far. God, we were almost there.
"Same." I say with a chuckle.
Everything felt so utterly calm. The sunset as we made out way onto the open road. Pastures upon pastures of lush greenery that made me feel so attuned to nature. Never had I had the pleasure of visiting Ireland, and although it was not the ideal situation, there was nothing wrong with taking advantage of it, was there?
"This place is beautiful."
"At least this made for a good vacation."
"Vacations mean relaxation, nothing about this situation is relaxing."
"I think you're at peace now." She mutters.
"I guess." I look around me, my body physically and mentally at ease. The sights, the comfort, the mere thought of being reunited with him. I was on cloud nine. Of course I was at peace now. I was almost there.
"Then for the next hour, this is a vacation."
"Until we get to Niall's?"
"What would I do without you, Jan?"
"Crash and burn."
We both laugh, "I guess so."
"Does something smell funny to you?"
She furrows her brow, but doesn't turn to look at me. The road was almost completely enveloped in darkness, the street lights only starting to lazily flicker on.
"I think we should open a window." She says sniffing the air around her.
"What's that light on the dash?"
She looks down and looks back up, "It says the temperature is too high." She shrugs.
"Janice! Pull over!"
She breaks hard, pulling over on the side of the road. "What?" She says turning to look at me, "What does that even mean?"
I direct her attention outside our window and her mouth slacks, "Is that coming from us?"
Smoke, it was rising rapidly up into the night sky. It smelled as if the car were about to set on fire and with it I felt my hopes burning up in flames as well.
"Get out of the car. Now." I say, undoing my own seat belt and grabbing my pack.
"Is this really happening?" Janice says slamming the car door shut, "I bet the Beetle would have made it all the way to Niall's."
"Who do we call?" I say nervously. "It's Saturday night. I'm pretty sure everything is closed Sunday. What do we do?"
"We're only a half hour away from Niall's."
"But the car isn't usable anymore. We can't drive in that thing! It's about to burst into flames!" I say angrily pointing at the car.
"But only one of us has to go to Niall's." She says with a knowing look on her face.
"Janice, I can't just walk there."
"Why not, it's not that far!"
"I don't know this area!"
"Emma." She grabs my shoulders and looks me straight in the eyes, "You have a fucking map! Stop making excuses and go. You've been waiting for this day for much too long, don't let anything stop you now."
"I'll call your dad, let him know what's happened. He can get some help to us by later tonight. But you, I want you to go! Go get him already! I'm a big girl I can take care of this. But the rest, the rest you need to do on your own."
"What happens if I fail? What if I get lost, or if he didn't want me to come to him."
She looks at me with a frustrated look upon her face, and immediately I knew I was being ridiculous. But still, she pushed me, "I'll be right there to catch you, babe. You call me and I'll run to you, no matter where you are. But you need to do this okay? Go get him already! It's fucking fate, Emma. It's all up to you now."
"Okay." I say, tightening my pack onto my back.
"Get out of here!"
I pull out the map and directions from my pocket before enveloping Janice in a tight squeeze. "I love you, Jan."
"You too, Ems."
And with that, I sprint. I head forward, running into the damp night. Hoping that this wasn't all for nothing. Hoping that soon I'd be with him.
Wrong, so utterly wrong. As always, I was wrong. Fate is not on my side, it may have led me to him, but it sure as hell won't let me do anything about it. I sit on the side of the road, drenched in water. I couldn't have possibly made it more than a mile before the heavens unleashed a storm mightier than any I have seen in my nineteen years. It was utterly absurd.
My hair drips onto dark pavement, and I can at least console myself with the fact that if anyone were to find me on this deserted road, in the pathetic state that I am in, at least my tear drops will have mixed with the pouring rain and I won't look as pathetic as I feel. How bloody stupid to think I could have made it on foot. How bloody stupid to think this would all work out. I was wrong, fucking wrong.
This was a mistake. I shouldn't have tried to look for him.
I open my pack, ready to pull out my cell phone and call Janice. I shiver as cold drops hit my shoulder, my face, every inch of me.
I push through the first layer of clothes, desperately searching for my phone when I touch it. I feel it. The hard edges of the box with the paper plane. I pull it out feverishly, as if it is my last sign of hope and hold it in my grasp, the silver becoming speckled with water.
"He taught you how to fly, Emma. How could you both soar without each other?"
I came all this way. I've made it this far. It can't be much longer. This coldness, this bitter anger, it can't be worse than living a life without him, could it? There was no way in hell. I can't let him go, I can't give up.
"Stop making excuses and go. You've been waiting for this day for much too long, don't let anything stop you now."
They're right. They're all right. I need to stop making excuses. Everyone's fought so hard for me to be happy, for me to be with him. How could I just give up so easily after everything that's happened.
What would Niall think of me then? What about me. How could I ever possibly live with myself knowing that I was this bloody close, this bloody close, and I gave it all up because I was cold and angry.
I get up from the concrete, my eyes readjusting to the lit street. I am ready.
I am coming.
Niall, I'm ready to run to you.