Ask Missy

Hi all, Missy here! I'm starting an advice column which will hopefully be able to benefit everyone. I will be answering all types of questions so please don't be shy and ask away! If you are satisfied with your care, please share this among your fellow Movellians so we can help a lot of people! Love always, Missy xxx

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14. Aleceia Peterson

I've recently found out a guy I have a crush on likes me back. It's really great and all, but... I can't date 'til I'm 16 because of my religion, and my friends are telling me to ditch my beliefs and date this guy. What should I do?

 

-Aleceia Peterson

 

 

Okay, first of all I think it's important that you tell your friends to stop saying you should ditch your beliefs. It's not right. You have to make this decision for yourself.

 

Secondly, how far away are you from being 16? If it's right around the corner (within a few months) then it could be best to wait it out. However, if you are quite a way away from being 16 then here's what I suggest doing:

 

First decide how much your beliefs mean to you. If they mean more to you than this guy, then he's not worth it. You also have to consider your parents. Would you feel like you could tell them about him or would you be sneaking around?

Also ask yourself this: In 40-50 years when you look back on this, and you didn't take the opportunity to go out with him, would you be happy because you stuck by your religion or would you regret it because you didn't do it?

People often find that they regret more the things they did not do than the things they did do and screw up. At least if you do it, even if you don't like it, you still get to say "I did that," rather than "I wish I'd done that."

 

This response has been a bit all over the place. I'm sorry about that. Here's the bottom line:

If you stick by your religion, you'll unknowingly make your parents and the rest of the people in your religion proud, but you will never know how great things could be between you and this guy.

On the other hand, if you go out with this guy you go against your religion, and depending on your parents you may have to sneak around a bit as well. And if they find out, they could be disappointed.

You just have to weigh up the odds and see which one wins.

 

"I'd rather look back on my life and say, "I can't believe I did that," instead of saying, "I wish I did that.""

 

Love always,

Missy xxx

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