15. Lost boy
"Wow Ashton you're so good. I want to learn." He smiles at me. "Here sit down. I can teach you." I stand there awkwardly but finally decide to sit. After I fail miserably on the drums I get up collapsing on the couch. "Ugh. How can you stand that its so much workk." He giggles. "Its what I love. I want to join a band but... Nobody really talks to me... I guess you can kinda call me.." he thinks for a little. "The drummer boy." He sits down and I put my head in his lap. "I wouldn't call you that.. People are assholes. Hey I think you and my friend Mik-" I stop looking down. "Well.. Ex-friend.. I guess now would get along..." He rubs his hand through my hair. "do you want to talk about it?" I shake my head. He sighs. "Okay.. I'm here though." I nod. i sigh out feeling tired. Soon sleep taking over.
"Annabelle please.. I want to talk to you.. You're supposed to be my friend.. I thought you wanted me and Calum to be friends." I sigh throwing my phone down. "Well great. Now she thinks she has no friends. Its all you fault Calum. It truly is. I shouldn't have even helped you!" I throw something across the room. It barely misses him. He looks pissed but then it turns into sadness. "I know... this wouldn't have happened if I wouldn't have came into her life..." I look down. "I'm sorry man..." he nods. "I'm just going to go.." I try to argue but he's already walking away fast.
I feel tears rising but I push them back. "I'm not a fucking pussy." I don't need to cry. I walk into my house only to see my mum isn't here again. She hardly ever is anymore. I sigh walking into my room. I pull out my phone scrolling up to our texts. "I really like you annabelle." "I really like you Calum. Like a lot." "I think I'm falling for you." "I think I'm falling for you Calum." "1.Annabelle? 2.Annabelle please. 3. Annabelle I'm sorry. 4. Annabelle I thought you were falling for me... 5. I thought I meant something to you. 6. Please babe... 7.I fuck everything up. 8. You know what fuck it. Fuck it all. Just forget about us." Then the last text I got from her. "I shouldn't have got into a realtionship with you." I slam my phone down. Is it stupid to feel so much pain over a stupid American bitch? She's probably fucking that boy she was with. She never cared about you. It was all a lie. She just wanted attention. Everything you said to her she laughed at. You are such a pussy. You let your guard down. You could get anyone you wanted now look at you. You're pathetic. I get up putting my hands behind my head. "I can still get anyone I want!" Maybe thats why you don't have friends. Maybe thats why nobody likes you. Fuckboy. "I just want this to end. Make it end." I walk down the stairs. Maybe if I just do it once.. They say it takes the pain away. They say it makes you feel better. Once and never again. One time. Thats all. I take the blade placing it. Then its done. I sigh out in relief grabbing a towel and placing it on the cut. I close my eyes. "You're such a disappointment. Now what is your mum going to think? You're a freak now." The thoughts rush making me feel dizzy. "Maybe one more time..."
Finally I feel numb.. the sadness subsiding. Everything gone. Its like everything is gone. Like this little thing took me to a different world. 6 cuts. The first two are deep. But not too deep for me to bleed out. I lay down on the couch loving the feeling of feeling numb. I know it's only going to subside soon though. I grab a bottle of pills. "Nobody will care anyways. I'm just a dick. A player." My moms never around. I put atleast 10 pills in my hand. Thats all. I sigh putting then in my mouth. I soon feel my eyes start to close. I like this.
I wake feeling confused. I stretch looking around. "Calum?" I whisper quietly. Turning to see its Ashton. I shy. I forgot for a second Calum and I aren't... Together... Wait where am I? I shoot up. Feeling dizzy from getting up so fast. "Hey are you okay?" Ashton puts his hands on my waist. "Y-yeah. Just got up too quickly." He groans sitting up. "Sorry I didn't want to wake you earlier so I pulled the couch out." Thats right I'm still in ths storage place. I smile at him. "It's okay. You ready to go?" He nods smiling. I grab my phone checking it. 6 Texts from Calum. I sigh opening them. "1. I'm sorry annabelle. 2. I can't do this anymore. 3. Nobody cares. 4. I hope you can forgive me before its too late." 45 minutes after those. "Its too late now... The bottles empty." I run as fast as I can out of the place not even waiting for Ashton. I don't even look where I'm going I just know I have to find Calum.