15. Chapter Fifthteen
She finally came to school. "Hi" I said looking at her. She looked sad and miserable. "Hi" she almost whispered. I saw something that looked like a bruise on her cheek but she had covered it up very well. Why? "I'm so sorry for everything" I apologized, "it's all my fault!" She shook her head, "it's all my fault don't blame it on yourself." "Hey" I tried smiling, "what's wrong?" She looked down, "nothing.. Everything is fine." "Everything is gonna be okay" I almost whispered, "it's gonna be okay.. I promise!" "Promise?" she looked at me with tears in her eyes. What was wrong? She was on the edge to tears and she had a bruise on her cheek.
I nodded, "I promise!" She fell into my arms, "this isn't fair to you." I had never seen her broken or miserable. She had always been happy and unbreakable. "I don't know what it is but whatever you are going through or what your family is putting you through is not fair to you" I said, "it's gonna be alright.. I'm gonna help you get through this." "Everything is a mess and everybody hates me and they don't want me here. They wouldn't even care if I died" she explained. I got tears in my eyes, not crying, "don't you dare to say that!! How can you even say that?! I care! Lucas cares! Maia cares! Carter cares! Tanner cares! I care!! I really care!!" "You're just saying that to be nice" she mumbled. She was depressed. If I didn't help her she would kill herself. "Let me see your wrist." She showed me one of her wrists. It looked fine. "And the other one." "Why are you doing this?" she exclaimed. She cut herself. She was cutting. "Because I know what I'm gonna see but I actually don't wanna see it.. I just wanna help you stop" I mumbled. I looked at my wrist. I still had scars. "I don't know what you are talking about.. I just cut myself with a knife.. Accidentally. Yesterday" she started walking away. I sighed, "fine.. Just come back please." She didn't listen to me so I ran after her and found her sit against a tree. "Why don't you want me to help you?" "Because I don't need your help and you have nothing to help me with.. There's nothing wrong" she exclaimed. I showed her my wrist, "look at this." "What is this?" she almost whispered. "It's scars" I said, "you're probably thinking what happened?" She nodded. "I cut myself. No kidding.. I hated life and I hated everything. I thought everybody hated me" I told her, "I almost killed myself.. But you know what? My best friend helped me to get back on track.. It's 4 years ago and they're still there." "I'm so sorry" she mumbled and looked at me. "I know.. They'll never go away.." She looked down. "I haven't cut myself!" she exclaimed, "why do you think that?" "Because you're literally hiding your wrist and you're really sad." She stood up. "Fine then show me if you haven't cut yourself then show me.. If it's just a cut with a knife you would wanna show me because it's not something personal. It happens." "Justin I um- I can't" she said and looked down. "You were so happy" I said, "so wonderful to look at.. You looked like everyday was the best day in your life... I just wanna know what happened?" "So you also hate me now?" I shook my head, "no.. I never will.. I'll never hate you.. No matter what you do I can't hate you Chantelle... Believe me I wanted to just hate you a little bit sometimes, because you can be one hell of a bitch but it didn't matter.. I cared about you anyway." "I'm sorry but it's just hard for me to believe right now" she looked down again. "Please look up.. I'd much rather see your beautiful eyes than the top of your head" I smiled. She looked up with a tear down her cheek, "everything's a mess. You can't get into it.. I won't let you.. It'll tear you apart." "I don't care if it's for you Chantelle." "How can you be so sweet when you hate me?" she exclaimed, "it doesn't make sense." I looked wondering at her, "why do you keep saying that I hate you? You don't know that.. I do not.. And I swear to god.. Do not hate you.. Like not at all!!" "Don't lie to yourself." "Fine" I exclaimed, "I tried to help you. Just call me when you want help.. I wanna help.. And I do not hate you.. I know you cut yourself and I know someone hit you.. I know you were pregnant.. I know you aren't feeling well.. I know everything.. And I've been exactly through the same.. I can help.. If only you want me to." I walked away leaving her speechless.