"Micheal! Micheal!" I sat outside his window criss crossed on his fire escape. I rapped my knuckles on his window again impatiently. I was horny and needed satisfaction! "Baby, come on!"
This had being going on for a while, Micheal and I. I don't know why, but cheating on Mark with his best friend wasn't as hard as I had thought it would be. In fact, it was a buzz that drew me in like a moth to flame. It just made everything more... sexy.
And with that Micheal appeared in his naked glory in front of the window, glaring at me with his tired eyes. He unlocked the window and stomped away, leaving me to slide it up and shimmy in his room. I heard his bed moan under his added pressure and I closed the window behind me, locking it.
As I slid beside him on the bed he wrapped an arm around me and I let my hands explore his naked body. "Does your nightly visit deal with anything... Oh... I dunno," He dipped his hand under my shorts and played with my underwear, making me shiver because his hand was cold. "Sexual."
"Maybe," I told him, breathless as his hand traveled closer to my sweet spot. In return I took his member in hand and teased him. "I couldn't stop thinking about you, Micheal," I told him in a needy tone. He understood and stopped playing with me to get my clothes off.
"What did you think I was doing naked like this in bed, Sydney?" Micheal asked he rolled to hover over my now naked self and kissed my lips. His lips traveled down to my chin, then to my jaw, and then he licked down my neck to my collar bone. I tangled my hands in his hair, wrapping my legs around him to bring him closer to me.
"Oh, I dunno, math homework?" I said sarcastically, chuckling a bit only to gasp as he moved up and nipped my neck.
He chuckled, too, and then we became serious as he kissed me again with more passion. Both of us drowned in the moment we forgot a condom.
~ ~ ~
"Shea, I just don't feel good." I said, holding my stomach. I wanted to cry. It was so noticeable! The bump now extended farther than my hipbones now and so there was no hiding it. I wanted to curl up and just die of embarrassment. How could I have made such a large mistake?!
"Just let me in! Jesus, Sydney!" Shea banged against my door with her fist and I sighed. I had been so stupid.
"Just..." I began, turning toward the door. Would she judge me, too? My mother had already flipped enough shits for the whole country... "Just..." I began again, but my voice cracked and so I trailed off again.
I heard Shea sigh loudly and stomp. "You have till the count of three!"
Jumping at the tone in her voice I grabbed the door handle and unlocked it with my other hand, starting to open the door only for her to burst through, not looking at me. "What is it?! Huh?! Are kids bullying you at school?!" She turned around in her rant to give me an angry stare, "Why are you - Whoa." Her face was a mix of anger, confusion, and shock.
It was such a funny face I couldn't stop myself from nervously giggling. I couldn't look her in the eyes so I stared at the floor. I was sure my face was really red and I ran my tongue against my teeth nervously.
We were quiet for a moment before Shea moved and I glanced up to see she was holding off tears and a smile. She lightly touched my stomach, "Is it Mark's?" A tear fell down her cheek and she chuckled a little bit, still kind of shocked. "Wow, Sydney. Just, wow." I opened my mouth to speak and she shook her head, stopping me. "No... No. Sit down."
More tears fell from her eyes and she gave me an even larger smile as we sat down. It was a breath of fresh air to see she wasn't mad, disgusted, or worse, disappointed. It would have killed me had she looked at me with disappointment. "It's not Mark's, it's Micheal's."
Shea looked into my eyes, her lips forming an 'O' and my body tensed. Here it was, she was gonna lay it all on me: I'm a horrible person, I'm disgusting, vile. My heart felt heavy and I wanted to cry again. But the feeling was wiped away with relief as Shea started laughing.
"Oh, you are a mess, kid!" She drew me into a hug and I gladly wrapped my arms tightly around her. Just the smell of her made me relax and realize just how great of a friend and person she was.
Relieved she was acting great to this news I had held her out at arms length and looked at her with tears in my eyes. "Shea, what am I going to do? I'm huge?"
Shea had let out another laugh, "Darling, you're only going to get bigger." I frowned and sighed. "I will take care of you." Shea put a protective hand on my stomach. "Your baby is my baby and I promise to be with you every step of the way. Alright?"
I let my jaw drop at Shea's words, did she know what she was signing up for? "Shea this is a baby and I can make you a God parent, but-"
"No!" Shea cried, her face had turned pleading. "Sydney, please. You know I can't have children, let me live my life through you! Please, just this once." She had slid off the couch and to her knees, her hands pressed together.
"Fine, but that means you have to be there when I tell Micheal." She jumped up, happy. "And!" I said loudly to get her attention again, "And when I tell Mark."
"Okay, yeah, sure." Shea had squealed and did this shaking dance while screaming. "We're having a baby!!"
~ ~ ~
Wearing Shea's clothes had covered my bump better than I had thought it would. It was just one of the lucky things in my life. However, my life was more unlucky than lucky. Micheal had noticed that I hadn't done what he had told me to do. I hadn't got an abortion and he kept trying to get me alone to "tell" me again to get one. He had turned from the sexy bad boy to crazed ex-lover and it scared me.
Yet my knight in shining armor kept me company and made sure I was well taken care of. Shea was an angel in human skin. If she hadn't been there then my life would have been completely crazy and horrible with Mark and Micheal both knowing.
I shook my head to rid myself of the thoughts of what could be...
I took the ice cream from Shea when she came back holding a chocolate and a vanilla. Vanilla had been my favorite, but now my body craved chocolate with an almost inhuman thirst.
I stole the chocolate ice cream from Shea and moaned as I tasted it's chocolatey goodness. Shea just laughed and licked her vanilla merrily as we sat on a park bench. Shea was trying to convince me to go to school again. I had been avoiding it after one kid pointed out that I was getting larger, that was a week ago.
"Think about our baby," Shea said, giving me a pointed look. "Do you want her growing up in a house like mine, or a house like yours?"
I wrinkled my nose at Shea, finding both options to be terrible. "Neither. Your parents ignore you and mine won't leave me alone." I took a long lick of my ice cream in thought. "I want it to be in the middle. Perfectly balanced. Like, Mark."
At the mention of Mark Shea frowns. "I see." Shea had lost all respect for Mark and Micheal when they abandoned me and the baby. Only Tre and I actually talk anymore. The only time I ever see Micheal is when he is trying to corner me to undoubtedly try and get me to abort.
I'm not the first girl Micheal has gotten pregnant and I am sure I won't be the last.
Another reason I find Shea to be an angel is that she has protected me from Micheal's doom and managed to always be by my side. I kind of felt bad for her, as in order to keep me away from Micheal she has had to get Tre to do her favors. No matter how nice Tre was, he wasn't exactly the same person when it came to deals. If you owed him a favor you pretty much gave him your soul.
And in return for him doing favors, Shea would have to either pay him or do him a favor. I didn't like it, but Shea didn't really give me a choice in the matter. She insisted that Tre wouldn't make her do anything too terrible and I could only lamely agree. Even though Tre was head over heels for her I still didn't trust him to not use her favors for something bad or sexual. I wouldn't put it past him to try and make her have sex with him as a return of favor, not that Shea would actually let him.
But, like I said, I had no say in that. Life at home wasn't much better, either. However, while my mother despised my guts, she was still my mother and offered to keep me in the house until I had the baby and a stable job to go along with taking care of her grandkid. After the initial shock had worn down, my mother had come to the conclusion that hating me wouldn't help me or her and so she decided to help. But that was before Micheal had talked to her.
Now she is all about having the baby aborted, so I tend to hang around Shea more than anyone else. She is the only one who supports my idea of keeping my kid. My father, unlike my mother, can't even look at me so he stays away from the house, trying to avoid me. Little does he know I'm barely at the house anyway. So the joke is on him.
"So, are your parents coming around to the idea of you having a kid?" Shea asked, looking at me.
I shrugged, "My dad is still avoiding me, but my mother is coming to realize that I won't give up the baby. She feels bad for me and she said she is going to talk to Micheal's mom about stepping up, that is 'if I still think I can raise a child'." Shea and I both rolled our eyes at that.
Shea snorted, "That kid has so many kids he can't afford to 'shape up'," Shea joked. Our laughter died off and I watched her look around the park, searching for any sign of trouble.
"Do you really think he won't help me pay?" I asked after a moment, a sad tint to my voice. Shea looked at me guiltily and then looked away, shaking her head. She couldn't meet my eyes and I nodded. "Yeah, I thought as much." A sudden urge of anger took over me and I threw the bowl of the ice cream in the trashcan next to me a little too hard because Shea was then touching my arm and telling me to calm down. "I can't calm down, Shea, this baby is gonna come really soon and he or she won't even have the privilege of a father!"
"Sydney," Shea said in such a serious voice that I looked at her, too stunned to retort. "Your child is better off not knowing that that pig is his or her's father." She squeezed my shoulder and I bit my lip, knowing she was right but still hurt that I had let a terrible man be a father.
I put my head in my hands and sighed heavily. "I know, Shea. I know." I dropped a hand down to my stomach and rubbed it softly. I sniffed as tears started to come to my eyes and I lifted my head up and tilted it back, trying to stop from crying. However the sun just burned my eyes so I let my head fall down to my chest and sobbed.
"Oh, honey!" Shea said as she walked around the picnic table to sit next to me and hug me tight. I turned and returned the hug, sobbing into her shoulder. She rubbed my back and kissed my head, shushing me lightly. "Don't cry, we'll get through this." When I stopped crying and started to hiccup she kissed my head again and put me at arms length and smiled encouragingly at me. "We'll get through this, okay?"
I wiped my eyes and nodded. I still can't believe that a freshman in high school was more supportive than my senior exes. While I stopped hiccuping I returned her smile and hugged her again. "I love you, kid. Really, I do."
Shea laughed and threw one of her arms around my shoulders. "Love you too, Sydney, and hey, do you want another ice cream?" She looked over her shoulder at the stand nearby and sucked in her lips. "I could go for a second and," she looked back at me and patted my stomach softly. "The little guy loves chocolate."
"I'll take another one," I said after a second of thought. And so Shea got up to go get another one. Soon after when I found out that I was pregnant I found out that whenever I went out with Shea she would be the one to pay. For everything.
She didn't let me pay for meals, games, snacks, movie tickets, or anything else. Shea bought for me using her allowance, she insisted that I save my money for the baby. At first I had found it infuriating, but after I started to eat more for two than for one I realized that I didn't have enough money to pay the bills for things like casual meals anymore. It was just another reason I love Shea, she was such a giver. My only problem with it was that I didn't have a chance to give back to her, which doesn't seem fair to her.
When I looked up to see how she was coming along I saw the fearsome trio of Tre, Mark, and Micheal. Mark took bros before hos to a whole other level when he found out I cheated on him, he was like my dad and avoided me with all of his might.
Seeing them I slowly got up from the bench and waddled over to Shea as she accepted the ice cream with a smile and almost ran into me with them. "Hey, what are you-"
"The fearsome trio is here, we need to leave." I said quickly, interrupting her. I watched her look at the trio and raise an eyebrow, probably at Tre. She must of gotten a face back because she rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. I didn't dare look behind me.
"C'mon, let's go, we can eat and walk around the lake. If we get hungry again they have a hotdog stand over there." She said, as she handed me an ice cream. She turned and said a quick goodbye to the goofy looking guy behind the counter named Phil, he shyly said good bye back and blushed.
When we were far away from the stand I nudged Shea in the ribs and gave her a wiggle of my eyebrows. "Phil seems to have the hots for you." I said slyly, smirking as Shea blushed and started to stutter.
"B-bah! He is just s-shy." She gave me an embarrassed look and I smiled widely. She bit her lip and looked back behind her, "You think- Oh my god." Shea face contorted with anger and she sprinted off, startling me. "MICHEAL! YOU JERK, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" I looked behind me and to my horror saw Micheal hit Phil. Poor weird looking Phil fell down to the ground from Micheal's hit and started crying, holding his face. Micheal just started to kick him, laughing.
I stood there in shock, watching the scene play out. It seemed Tre and Mark were also in shock because they watched Micheal with stun obvious on their faces. It seemed out of all of us Shea was the only one who could act quickly. I had never seen her run so fast and when she got to Micheal she threw her ice cream at him, making him face her before she tackled him down so hard they both bounced a little after impact. Luckily for him he was on grass and that none of his football buddies were around to see the senior football player get tackled by a freshman swimmer.
The two started to fight on the ground, rolling around until Shea came out on top. She punched him a good couple of times and after the 7th punch he used his free hand that wasn't blocking his face to smack her really hard on the side of her head. She fell off of him and she started to get up but he shoved her back down and started to choke her. Her arms weren't as long as his and so she clawed at his hands, unable to hit his face.
While they had been fighting I had been so focused on them that I hadn't realized that I was waddling over to them as quickly as I could. I was panicking because my ex was beating up my best friend. "Stop it! Stop it!" I was yelling unwittingly. It seemed to snap Tre and Mark out of their idiot's daze and they pulled Micheal off of Shea. I was close enough now to hear her take in a large breath before she started coughing violently, rolling on her side away from Micheal. One hand was holding her throat and the other was over her mouth as she coughed.
"Shea! Shea are you okay!" I cried, trying to waddle quicker but failing. I still had a good 30 ft. between us and the boys were having a hard time dragging the beefy football player away from Shea. He managed to spit on her and call her a bitch before the guys could pull him farther away from her.
The boys were telling Micheal to calm down and that he was causing a scene. And he was causing a scene, people from around the park had stopped having fun to stare at the belligerent man being held back by his friends. Yet no one had come to help restrain the angry man. I could smell the reek of alcohol coming from Micheal 10ft. away and almost gagged by how powerful the scent was as I got closer to help Shea up. Phil was still crying and I saw blood coming from his nose, it was most likely broken. I could hear that not only was Shea coughing she was sobbing, too.
"Sissy ass bitch! You better be crying you stupid motherfucker!" Micheal hissed at Shea, still struggling with his buddies. Though they had dragged him back to the lake path, far away from Shea and Phil and I. I stared at Micheal with disbelief. He was the man I had a child with? Disgust morphed on my face as I drew closer and in his line of view. When he saw me his face of pure rage turned to one of guilt and shame. His fight drained from him and he looked away, the veins on his neck flexing furiously. I looked away from him, feeling like I was going to puke. What if he had done that to me?
"Shea," I whispered urgently to my friend and she sat up, shaking like a leaf in the wind. "Are you okay?" I asked, tears stinging my eyes as I saw just how scared she looked. She shook her head and let out another sob and I turned to give Micheal an angry glare but found that he had gotten free of his buddies and was furiously stomping away. Mark and Tre were following after him to make sure he stayed out of trouble, Tre periodically glancing back at Shea.
"I hate him," I said furiously, grabbing Shea's shaking arm and trying to pull her to her feet.
"He almost killed me," Shea sobbed raspily, and she ripped her arm away from me to hug my legs. I put my hand on her head and stroked her hair as she cried against my legs, then she let go to go into a violent coughing fit. When she finished she put her arms around herself and looked at Phil. "Is he okay? Phil?" Shea asked in a raspy voice, she rubbed her throat, and I looked at him. He was still crying, but it was lighter than before. Still holding his nose he nodded shakily, staring at Shea like she was crazy, but also with a tinge of admiration. Shea looked away, embarrassed.
"We can take him to the hospital if you want," I said, trying to make Shea feel better. She nodded and took in a deep breath, wiping her tears and snot from her face with her sleeve. She sniffed and coughed lightly, calming herself down before she tried to stand up. However her shaking arms were like jelly and she fails.
"C'mon," She said angrily, pounding the ground, but the shaking doesn't lessen. She growled and tried to stand up again. Again she fails. I looked at her sadly, knowing she didn't want my help. But before she could unsuccessfully try again a guy in a black hoodie with the hood pulled far down swooped in and helped Shea stand up. She knew it wasn't me because the hands were too big and so she looked up and her stubborn 'I've got it' look melted into one of awe. "You're..." She whispered and he nodded.
He let go of her and patted her head, stepping away. I stared at the way Shea's face looked, not even thinking about looking at the man. She looked curious and hopeful and it was cute for a girl her age, but weird for someone who just finished getting beaten in a brawl. "Thanks," I said to him briefly before grabbing Shea's arm and dragging her away over to Phil to get him to a hospital. I looked to Shea to see her staring at the guy as he walked away.
"Seven, tonight!" She coughed a bit, throat still sore, and I watched, slightly annoyed, as the guy stopped and turned to look at her over his shoulder, somehow keeping all but his nose hidden. It was weird that he managed to do that with him being over 6 ft. tall. "That alley!" I rose an eyebrow as the man stood there, probably thinking about it, before he looked back in front of him and kept walking. "Please..." Shea whispered, disappointment laced in her whisper. She coughed a bit more before she sighed and looked down at Phil. She bent down and slowly moved his hands down to inspect the damage. Shea wasn't shaking anymore and she studied him thoughtfully.
If I had thought he was goofy before, he looked straight out ugly now. His nose and eyes were swollen and around his eyes were black. The blood, snot, and tears on his face didn't look too hot either and I grimaced at the sight, disgusted. "Ooh, that must have hurt," I said, trying to lighten the mood.
Instead Phil looked down, blushing deeply with an ashamed look on his face and he sniffled then cringed. "Hey," Shea, whispered softly to him, touching his arm. He looked at her and she smiled. "Don't cry alright? Your nose is broken, but I'll take you to a doctor." I watched, kind of amazed, by how Shea had seemed to get over herself just like that when that guy came and helped her up. I made a note to ask her about him later. She helped Phil up and we headed to the street to flag down a taxi to get to the hospital.
Months later the baby was arriving. It had happened while I was sleeping that my water broke. I didn't realize it until I woke up from the pain of contractions and thought I had peed myself, but when I looked I saw that there was blood mixed in I got scared and screamed for my mother.
Mom then brought me to the hospital and on the way she kept me talking and told me to take deep breaths. I told her it didn't hurt enough yet for deep breaths and she told me that it would. Dad had refused to come to the hospital with us and instead said he'd call Shea. I didn't trust him to do that, though, so I asked mom to call Shea when we got to the hospital.
While I was taken to my room my mom went to the phones area of the hospital and called Shea. Within twenty minutes Shea was there and she and my mom met me up in my room. We were all talking excitedly, even with contractions getting worse as my cervix started to dilate. Then the doctor came and said I was ready, ushered out my mom and Shea, and ten minutes later I delivered a baby girl. I named her Amber.
"She is so precious," Shea said the next early morning, staring at Amber. "I love the name you chose, too, I wish I could have gotten in on that."
My mother laughed and patted Shea's shoulder, "I wish I had been clued in on names, too, because Amber is just so adorable." Mom put down her finger near Amber's face and and wiggled it, cooing. "Aren't you just the cutest? Doesn't your name just match your cute little face. I think it does. I think it does!"
Shea and I giggled at my mother's silliness and I was glad that she was here to see her grandkid. I kind of wished Micheal and my dad were here, too, to see her. Their daughter and grandchild, but then I threw the thought away angrily. If they cared they would have made more of an effort to actually care and support me through the pregnancy.
My mom looked at me and she sighed, running a hand through my hair. "I know how you feel honey, and I can tell you that your father, once he sees her, he will get over himself and see that what he was blessed with, even if in a... a not so traditional way, was a beautiful and healthy granddaughter." My mom kissed the top of my head lovingly and I leaned into the kiss, thankful for her support. Tears were in my eyes as I looked up at her when she pulled away.
"You think so?" I asked. My mother smiled and started to stroke my hair again.
"I know so, darling." I smiled back at her, reassured. She looked down at Amber and held her hands out. "Can I hold her?"
"Sure," I said, lifting Amber a little bit. I didn't really want to let her go, but I trusted my mother to hold her correctly, unlike Shea who I feared would drop her. While my mother had left to go home and sleep, Shea had stayed at the hospital with me all night. She had fallen asleep in one of the chairs in my hospital room, but she was still yawning. She didn't seem offended that I didn't let her hold Amber though. She was respectful of what I wanted for Amber and she didn't push me. Her respect for my decision made me feel bad for saying no, but I still didn't want to let her hold Amber. Not yet at least.
With Amber out of my arms, Shea scooted next to me on the bed and rested her head on my shoulder. "This bed is so soft." She said tiredly into my shoulder. I smiled at her and shifted uncomfortably.
"Maybe to you, but my butt is going numb. I wish I was allowed to stand at least." I complained, shifting my butt from side to side. Shea giggled tiredly and then was out like a light. I smiled warmly at her and said to my mom, "She was up all night with me, making sure that the nurses clued her in on things, too. She is such a great friend."
"Yeah," my mom agreed, not really paying attention to me with Amber in her arms. I leaned my head on Shea's feeling a bit drained myself and I was about to fall asleep when there was a knock at my door. "Come in," my mother said for me. I sighed and opened my eyes and instantly felt like screaming bloody murder.
"GET..." I stated really loudly, but then I stopped myself and whispered furiously. "Get out, Micheal. You have no right to be here." I looked down at Shea to make sure she was asleep and then looked back up at Micheal to see him hovering in the doorway, guilt plaguing his beautiful face. I didn't feel at all sorry for him. Instead I felt hatred.
After his little stunt in the park all of those months ago I hadn't seen him once. And I had been hoping that I'd never see him ever again. Apparently it doesn't work like that. He had tears in his eyes as he looked at my hateful stare, "Sydney," he croaked and I felt my anger start to dissolve as I looked at his longing eyes. Not wanting to show how much his pained look hurt me, I narrowed my eyes. I didn't want him to know that he still had the same effect on me as before. "I know you want nothing to do with me," he took a step in the room and I growled, cutting him off from his speech. I didn't want anything but his child support.
"Sydney," my mother scolded softly, careful not to wake Amber whom had fallen asleep with my mother's soft rocking. "I called him here, so just hear him out. He knows that what he did to Phil and Shea was wrong and it has been killing him-"
I looked up at my mom, feeling betrayed. He had almost killed Shea and he broke poor weird faced Phil's nose. "He almost killed Shea," I said stubbornly, trying to make that fact raise up the anger that had drained from me when I met his eyes. Instead I just sent him a harsh glare that didn't reflect how confused and betrayed I felt by myself and my mother. "You lost your right to your child when you said you wanted to abort her, and then when you pulled that stunt. The only thing Amber is ever going to get from her father is his money. When I get the money to I'm getting a restraining order."
"Sydeny!" My mother scolded too loudly, waking Amber up. She started to cry and my mother looked really stressed as she looked at Amber, then at me, and then at Micheal. Micheal took this opportunity to walk further in the room and held his hands out.
"Can I hold her? Maybe-" Micheal started, but he didn't finish because I let out an angry huff of air.
"Why would I let a violent stranger hold my baby?" I asked, frustrated with how much my chest hurt as I saw the tears in his eyes start to fall. He sniffed and backed away, head down. "Yeah, leave, you're good at that." I said angrily, accepting Amber from my mother, Micheal watched us from the door before he turned and walked to the door. "I said leave!" I screamed after him, tears now in my eyes.
Shea woke with a start, confused, before she looked towards the door and tensed up. She let out a wobbly, tired, sigh and stood up from the bed. Stretching she yawned and stumbled over to Micheal. "Come on, she doesn't want to see you right now," Shea said, walking him out and softly closing the door behind her. I watched their shadows through the blinds as they walked away and felt my heart hurt more.
I stared at Amber and could barely hear her crying, though I knew it was a loud wail. I bounced her a little and shushed her. But she was still fussy and so I checked her diaper. That was fine. "She's hungry," My mother said softly, her hands clasped in front of her.
"I got that," I snapped, not looking at her. My gown dipped down enough for me to just shift it down more and expose my nipple, so I could breast fed Amber. I felt betrayed. How could she invite Micheal? "After what he had done to funny looking Phil and Shea I don't think I want him anywhere near Amber. What if he gets drunk again and beats me like he did Shea? What if there is no one to stop him from choking me to death?!" I asked her angrily, looking at with a look of 'why?' on my face.
My mother bit her lip and scratched her head. "I just thought that you might want him to be a father. Seeing as how badly he messed up I thought it would be... redeeming for him to at least see her while you were still in the hospital." My mother sighed and walked around the bed to sit in the seat Shea had slept in. She plopped down so hard I thought she would break it, her head going into her hands. "I didn't plan on you exploding when you saw him."
I sighed, knowing my mother meant well. "Well I don't think I can ever look at him without... He... After all this time... I..." Frustrated I let tears form in my eyes and I started to cry. "Dammit, hormones!" I wailed. My mom stood up and sat where Shea had been sleeping, just her being close made some of the ache in my chest start to unwind and I looked at her with watery eyes. "I still love him mom," I confessed, hating myself for it. "But I can't get over what he did to Shea and to Phil. He may have been drunk, but what is to stop him from getting drunk again? Nothing, he scares me."
"Amber needs a father in her life, Sydney, maybe you should give him another chance now that he is coming around," my mom said wisely and I sniffed. Mom wiped my tears and I looked down at Amber as a nurse came in, telling me that I was free to go. My mom left to go check me out and I moved Amber away from my nipple, she was about to fall asleep and she had started to get fussy for still being near my boob. I covered up my boob again and sighed, thinking over what my mom said.
"Would you like to meet your father, Amber?" I asked my now sleeping baby. She didn't respond and I traced a finger over her beautiful, small face. She had his nose and I sighed. I leaned down and softly kissed her forehead. "Do you think that would be okay?" I asked her, and sighed again when I wasn't given a response.
When the door opened again, Shea stepped through and closed the door behind her, leaning on it. She let out a long sigh and I looked at her, letting her see my distress. She quickly walked over to the bed and put an hand on my shoulder. "What is it? What's wrong?"
"I think Micheal should be in Amber's life," I stared at Shea and watched her give me a confused look. "As in physically there, not just giving child support." And I saw her face morph into one of distaste and uncertainly.
"I don't think that is a good idea, Sydney." Shea said honestly. "But it's not my call to make. What does your mother think of it?"
"It's her idea." I said shyly, kind of disappointed that Shea wasn't okay with it. "But you were the makeshift father during the whole pregnancy and god dammit if you're not okay with it then neither am I." I told her, looking at her in determination. Shea was smart and sweet and if she thought something wasn't a bright idea I should trust her. She was the person who stuck with me through the thick and then thin of my pregnancy. Not even my mother had done that.
Shea shook her head and my determination wavered, "No, my opinion doesn't matter. If you think Micheal should be apart of Amber's life don't let my disliking for him change that. Just because I think it is a bad idea doesn't mean it is a bad idea." Shea grinned largely at me and kissed my head. "Besides he was blubbering like a baby, so I think he has fully come around. You should talk to him, not alone or anything, he hasn't gained that much trust from me yet. But you two should still talk."
I soaked up all of what she said like a sponge, holding on to her every word. Her opinion meant the world to me and I nodded to show her that I understood her. We lapsed into silence for a moment before I looked up, giggling.
"You know, when you were asleep I told him I wanted to get a restraining order." Shea chuckled lightly and asked if I was serious. "No, I was just angry that he was crying. Like after all the stunts he pulled he wanted to be the one to cry? It pissed me off."
"So where is your mom?" Shea asked, looking around the room and to the joined bathroom. The door was open so Shea looked back at me.
"She is checking us out," and just as I said that my nurse came in and took Amber from me, instructing Shea to help me into my normal clothes and sit me in a wheel chair. When we did that they gave me Amber back and my doctor came in and refreshed my memory on the dos and don'ts for when I get home. Shea listened intently and I again felt grateful for her being there.
And before I knew it I was wheeled out of the hospital and to the car where I went home. When I got home there was a surprise party waiting for me. It was my grandparents, my uncles and aunts and their families and we spent the rest of the day eating and having a merry time. My dad wasn't there.
Shea was the first one to leave, saying she had to meet up with a friend at seven and told me she would be back before midnight. She was going to stay the first weekend back just to help out before she would leave the dirty work to my mother, grandmother, and I. I had to thank her for that because she needed a break from me for a bit.
The rest of the night went fine as people followed Shea and started to leave. Amber turned out to be a big fan of a lot of people and quite enjoyed being held by people. It was awesome. And the start of a perfect day also had a perfect ending.
When Shea came back she was a beaming mess and she sat on the arm of the rocking chair I was on and leaned on me, sighing so happily I could only smile at her. "Who gave you ecstasy?" I joked with her, her good mood bringing up my spirits.
Shea's giddy smile somehow widened and she said in a merry voice, "We had a baby. And she is beautiful and perfect and so good and I'm a god parent." She slid off the arm of the chair and on my lap, making me pee a little. "Today is the greatest day in the world."
We both laughed merrily, "Well I'm glad one of us is happy, I think I just peed myself." Shea instantly stopped laughing at got off my lap, checking her shorts suspiciously. I laughed at her distasteful face and she cracked a smile.
"You peed on me? Where?" Shea asked, turning so I could show her. I slapped her butt, making her jump in shock and then roll with it by shaking her butt in my face. "Shakin my booty." She laughed and I shoved her butt away from my face.
The perfect end of a perfect day.