A memory for ever

This is pieces of my own life, that has stayed with me every single day - both good and bad ! in love and hatred


1. The night


Tears rolls slow and softly down my chin and soak my face. My entire body I crumbled around a pain that steadily grows from my chest. The cold wind that flutters in through the open window above me, is engulfing me, and leaves me shaking. But I don’t core, I only feel the pain in my chest and how it slowly spread. Slowly but with cause a burning sensation build in my throat and lungs and threatens to chock me.  I fight quietly for breath, in short gasping breaths, while tears stream from my blue eyes, and down into my light hair. I try to forget everything. Not to feel, only focusing on how I need to keep breathing.  Even if oxygen is fighting for entering my lungs, a iron grip around my heart is making this impossible.

I close my eyes and listen to the sound of my oven gasping breath. The quick, sharp sound from my own breathing is filling the room indefinably, and blending in with the sound of a slow, calm and heavy breathing. It is so untroubled, calm and deep that the flames in my throat are put out. The warm breath soothes over my bare skin and sends goose bombs down my spine and leave me shivering once again.  My eyes are still closed, while I try to follow the deep, heavy breathing but without luck.  The gasping breath from my chest is deafening in the room.  Even so is the only thing I can here, is the deep, calm breathing beside me, and feel the warm breathe so close to me. So close, but oh so far away. 


I open my eyes and meet another set of dark blue eyes in the dark. They are tortured and troubled. The eyes lock around mine and shelter me from myself. I can’t feel the pain in my chest anymore. The cold from the chill December wind doesn’t touch me neither does the fire in my chest. My breathing slows down and becomes a week shaking sound compared to the deep, heavy breathing beside me. The dark blue eyes doesn’t shy away from mine while the come closer. The warm breath is so close to my lips, a sigh escape me. My body begins to shiver, not because of the cold, but of longing after more.  A fire emerges where a hand carefully is placed on my waist.  The dark blue eyes are locked unto mine, while the hand slowly closes around my waist and pulls me ever closer.  The hand slides over the skin of my body and leaves me gasping after breath, and I feel again the warm breath so unbelievably close to my slightly open lips. The hand rests in the cavity at my neck, and a single finger slide over my cheek and wipes away the tears. A feeling of wanting to reach out after more is overwhelming and makes my body quiver. 

The before so heavy, calm breathing has become quicker, but is nowhere near my tempo. I take a deep breath to slow it down, only to hit a solid warm body. The hand moves again slowly back towards my waist and rests at my lumbar. Our bodies are now pressed against each other, while our eyes is locked.  Not a word is spoken, but those dark blue eyes is speaking it’s own language. The feeling has come back into my limbs, and my hand moves slowly up against the strong body. The bare skin under my hands contracts as I touch it. My hands stop at the chests muscular structure, where a pumping heart is noticeable under the skin.

My eyes are still locked in the strong eyes, only centimetres from mine. The hand on my lumbar slides up along my spine, and leaves me a shaking wreck, until it find my neck. Here it caresses for my neck, collarbone, shoulder and my soft light hair. My eyes closes, my breathing becomes faster and an intense lust burns inside me. Even though my eyes are close, I can feel the dark blue eyes burn through my eyelids. My hand glide from the chest up along the neck and I lock my fingers around the light brown curls. A deep sigh sounds as I too caress the warm body under my hands. An overwhelming longing fills me completely and makes the little space between us seem infinite. As an answer to my feeling I’m pulled even closer. The bare skin on my legs curls around a strong muscular body.


My eyes open just a fraction of a second to meet the dark blue eyes closer then ever.  The hot breath soothes over my lips, right before a set of lips locks around mine…………

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