I wasn't exactly sure what I was suppose to do. I figured Ryder would be my last child and that was it. I wouldn't have any more. Daniel drove us home and the ride was very quiet.
"I don't want to tell anyone yet." I answered and he nodded his head agreeing with me.
"I agree." He answered. I knew I should have never been stupid and slept with him again. "What are we going to do?" He asked and I shrugged.
"I guess I'm having another baby."
"We're having another baby." He said and I rolled my eyes at him.
"Yeah right. Cause you wanted to be around the first one." I said.
"I'm not fighting with you about this right now." I wasn't going to ruin our vacation because we found out about this. I wasn't going to take Ryder away from Daniels parents either. Why was I doing this to myself? The only reason that I was being seen with Daniel was because of Ryder. He was trying, he really was.
"What the hell are we going to do?" I asked Daniel nearly in tears once we got home. It was really late and everyone was asleep when we got home. He pulled me into his chest and hugged me.
"We will figure it out. Don't worry for right now." He said and I couldn't help but cry. Why would we put another child through this? We already had one child that would be broken for the rest of her life and now there was another child into this horrible horrible world.
"No we won't! We already have a child that has a broken family why are we going to bring another child into it?" I asked him sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Violet, we are going to figure all of this out, okay? Don't panic."
"How can I not panic? I loved you Daniel! I created life with you and you destroyed both of us! You left! You wanted nothing to do with us! How am I going to take care of two babies without their father?!" I asked placing my head in my hands.
"Just, sleep. We can talk in the morning." He said as he helped me into the bed and tucked me in before he left the room. What the hell were we going to do? I couldn't do it alone anymore.
I didn't sleep at all that night. I knew what was about to happen and I felt horrible that I did that to her. I knew she wouldn't want to have another baby with me but I got her pregnant anyway. I didn't mean to. I really didn't. I got up the next morning when Ryder did and I made her a bottle but also gave her some yogurt.
"She's still sleeping." I answered my mother as she sat at the table and wiped Ryder's nose and mouth.
"What did the doctors say?" I sighed. I shouldn't say anything but I needed to talk to someone about this.
"You can't say anything." I answered and she looked at me worried.
"What the hell is going on?" She asked and I sighed again before I sat down.
"Violet's pregnant." I said and she looked at me in shock.
"What? Who's the father?" She asked.
"I am." I answered. I was almost positive it was my baby. I think Violet would have said something otherwise and I'm the only person she has ever slept with and she wouldn't go and hook up with some random guy unless they were dating for a while.
"It's yours?" She asked and I nodded my head resting my head in my hands. "Are you sure?" She asked.
"Mom, she's not a slut." She nodded her head as she finished feeding Ryder and cleaning her up.
"What are you going to do?" She asked me. I wasn't sure at all about what we were going to do. Why was she asking me? I was freaking out. How could I be so stupid and not protect her and me?! What was Britney going to say when she found out because as of right now, her and I were still together and she would be flying out here next week to meet my family.
"I have no idea. Like, I moved on. I have a girlfriend." I commented. "She's coming here next week."
"You cheated on your girlfriend with Violet?" She asked.
"Well, I cheated on Violet with her and then I cheated on her with Violet." I answered. How could I have messed up so bad?
"You were cheating on me?" She asked standing in the doorway. Oh fuck! "Answer me!" She said raising her voice and my mom grabbed the baby before heading upstairs.
"Yes. I did." I answered and she nodded her head.
"Is that why you wanted a divorce? Because she could fuck you better than I could? Because I was pregnant with YOUR child and I was very uncomfortable?" She asked.
"What? No. I wanted a divorce because I wasn't happy anymore." I answered. I wasn't happy with our relationship anymore. Of course I was also cheating but she wasn't suppose to know about that.
"Why were you cheating on me?" She asked.
"I don't know. I guess because you were pregnant and you weren't treating to my needs." I said and she looked like she was going to kill me.
"Why the fuck did you sleep with me again! After we already had one child, and I'm just finding out about this now?!" She shouted. I had no idea what to say to her. I didn't want her to feel this way. I wanted her to trust me and I wanted to raise these two children with her if that's living with her or not living with her but I knew I needed to be there for all three of them and I needed to help her through this pregnancy.
"I don't know, Violet! I don't know!" I shouted back. She threw her hands in the air. "What do you want me to do?!" I asked.
"I don't even know anymore, Daniel but I sure as hell am not raising this baby with you." That hurt.
"Seriously? What about Ryder?"
"After this, all of this!" She shouted throwing her hands around the room and I knew what she meant. "I'm done. I can't do it anymore. Just leave us alone! Don't try to contact me. Don't have Hayden call me. Don't ask me about her don't ask about this baby. I'm seriously done. I can't do this anymore." She said as she turned around and she went upstairs. I heard her talking with my mom before I heard Ryder's cry before the front door slammed.
"What is going on?" My mom asked as she came down stairs. Thank god my sisters were still asleep and my dad wasn't home. We would all be screwed.
"Where did she go?" I asked.
"She told me not to tell you." She answered. Seriously? No one was a help at all in this house. I sighed before I grabbed my keys and headed out the door. I would find her sooner or later.
"Violet!" My Nonna shouted when she answered the door to her house.
"Hi" I said giving her a one armed hug since Ryder was in my other arm.
"Oh my gosh, she is beautiful." She said as she glanced down at Ryder who was sucking on her fingers and giggling. "Come on in."
"Where's Nonno?" I asked.
"He's in the living room." She answered and I snuck into the room before I wrapped my arms around his neck and he patted my arm.
"Who's this?" He asked.
"It's Violet." I answered.
"Violet! Hello sweetheart! What are you doing here?" He asked standing up and I walked around the couch before placing Ryder's seat on the couch.
"I came to visit. Thought you guys would love to meet your great granddaughter." I commented and he glanced at her before he leaned down to get a closer look at her.
"She looks just like Daniel." He said and I nodded before pulling her out of her seat.
"Yeah, she does. It's annoying." I answered handing her to him. "She's a little heavy." I said.
"I got her." He said before I walked into the kitchen to talk.
"What's been going on with you?" Nonna asked me.
"Oh nothing, just taking care of Ryder, I bought a house, wrote a book."
"You wrote a book?" She asked and I nodded my head. "What was it about?"
"It's about me, Daniel and Ryder." I answered.
"You and Daniel aren't together anymore right?" She asked.
"No we aren't." I answered. "We split seven months ago." How was I suppose to tell her that I was pregnant again? With his baby.
"And how is that going?" She asked.
"Well, it was going good." I guess I should tell her. I'm sure she would want to be the first to know besides Daniel but he was there.
"Until what happened?" She asked as she made some breakfast.
"Until, he got me pregnant again." I said and I waited for her to respond.
"You're pregnant?" She asked and I nodded my head on the verge of tears again. "Don't cry. It's okay. You can do this. You're already doing it with her, you'll be an amazing mother to two kids."
"I'm just stressing out."
"There is no need to stress out." She answered. "You can stay here, you can visit whenever you would like. Even though we aren't near you anymore we will still be there for you."
"I know it's just, him." I said. Maybe I was still in love with him. Maybe I wanted our family to work out because my family was always broken when I was Ryder's age. Maybe it was that I had been with him for so long and having him leave nearly tore me apart and I'm trying my hardest to keep it together for that little girl crawling around on the floor in the room over from this one.
"Do you want to be with him?" She asked.
"More than anything else in the world." I answered without thinking.
"Then be with him. Who cares about the divorce, you're having another one of his children. This is your way of being a family and don't let other's tell you what you can and cannot do." The doorbell rang and I got up to answer it thinking that it might be my aunt or cousin or something.
"Daniel." I said when I yanked the door opened.
"Violet. Jesus. I was so afraid. I thought something bad happened to the both of you. Violet, I-" I cut him off and grabbed for him and brought his face towards my face and kissed him. "I'm sorry." He whispered when I pulled away.
"Me too." I was sorry for everything both of us had been through. I was sorry that I hadn't been treating him the way he wanted and I was sorry I pushed him to the point where he didn't want to be with me. I was sorry for bringing our daughter down with me thinking that he was he only bad guy in this situation when it took two to make a family and it took two to get a divorce but it took two to love and all we both wanted was to love each other.