RYDER IS A MONTH OLD
“She’s perfectly healthy. She’s a perfect little baby girl.” The doctor said and I smiled. I already knew everything that she was telling me. I didn’t need to hear it come from her lips. She left the room and I quickly put Ryder’s clothes back on. I promised Daniel that we would go and see him. I didn’t want her to get attached him but he was her father and he had rights even though we settled it in the court that he didn’t.
“How did it go?” He asked when I walked into the starbucks and he got up to greet me.
“Great. She’s perfect but we don’t have to have people tell us that.” I said as I placed her seat down next to him and went to get a coffee. He took her out and I watched as he placed her on his lap and he kissed her little head. I smiled. I wish that we could be a family but we all knew that that was never going to happen and I should probably push that thought to the back of my head.
“What’s your name?” The guy asked. He was a really attractive guy. He had bright blue eyes and he had brown hair. He was very tall and he was built. He had a tattoo on his neck and one on his arm.
“Violet.” I answered smiling at him and he smiled back and his smile was beautiful. I paid for the drink and right away he went to make it. When he came over with my drink there was a piece of paper on it and I smiled as he handed it to me and thanked him. His number? I smiled as I looked at the paper and looked back at him. “Are you going to answer when I call or text?” I asked and he smirked at me.
“How could I not when there is such a pretty girl on the other line.” I looked back down at the paper and smiled before walking away.
“What took so long?” Daniel asked as I sat back down.
“Nothing.” I said shoving the number into my purse.
“I saw you.” He said and looked at me. “I saw your flirting with him.” He said and I looked back at him.
“Okay? And?” I asked back taking a sip of my drink.
“Your daughter was sitting right here.” He said.
“Okay. What the hell is your problem? You’re allowed to date other people while I’m pregnant and giving birth alone but once she’s here I’m not allowed to talk to other people?” I asked.
“That’s not the point Violet.” He said looking at me.
“It is the point. You ruin everything. You can be happy but I can’t. You said yourself that I needed to move on. Here I am moving on and you won’t let me.” I said. I was so pissed I was ready to take my daughter back and leave.
“No! Ugh!” He said before he placed her in her seat and he ran his hands through his hair. “I don’t know what to do with you!” He nearly yelled and people were beginning to look at us. One person I noticed was the guy who gave me his number. His name tag read Brandon. He stepped behind the counter before Daniel stood up.
“Well maybe you should just stay out of my daughter’s life.” I answered him.
“Fine.” He said before he stormed out of the place. I glanced up and Brandon was walking over to me.
“Who was the dickhead?” He asked me.
“My ex husband.” I answered.
“You were married?” He asked.
“Yeah. That’s where this little one came from.” I said glancing down at Ryder who was staring up at Brandon. The little blue bow in her hair was adorable and her eyes seemed like a very bright blue when she wore it.
“You have a kid too.” He said and I nodded.
“That doesn’t change anything. You don’t have to say sorry. You were suppose to spend the rest of your life with him. Kids come along with that sometimes.” He smiled at me. Jesus. I like him. “I would love to take you on a date sometime.” I blushed. “I’m off work. Wanna go for a walk?” He asked and I nodded my head.
“Can I just grab her carriage?” I asked him.
“Of course. I’ll help.” He said. He strapped her in while I grabbed the bags. He even carried her for me. The fact that I trusted him more than I did Daniel is probably really bad. Once we got out to the car he admired everything about it. “You’re rich.” He said and I nodded.
“My brother’s are famous.” He looked at me and tilted his head sideways.
“What were they famous for?” He asked.
“Youtube. We traveled the world for years so they could perform and meet their fans.” I answered. “Eventually one of them had a baby and wanted to get married. Now my oldest brother has some movies and one of my twin brother’s writes songs for other artists.
“The Brooks brothers.” He said and I nodded.
“You look just like Beau.” He answered and we walked and I laughed. Everyone said that. “Tell me about you.” He said as he pushed the carriage for me.
“Well, what would you like to know?” I asked him and he thought about it for a second.
“What are your parents like?” He asked. I took a deep breath.
“Well, my mom died when I was seventeen and my dad has never been in my life. I don’t have much family. Well that I see anyway.” I answered and he looked over at me.
“So you haven’t had an easy life.” I shook my head.
“Is there anything else I should know?” He asked.
“Well I’m divorced but you already know that. I used to be suicidal.” I shrugged.
“Have you ever tried-”
“Yes.” I answered and he stopped walking before he pulled me into his arms.
“I’m glad you’re here.” He said and I smiled.
“Yeah me too. I’m proud of the child I created.” I smiled looking down at her.
“What’s her name?” He asked.
“Ryder Violet.” I answered. “Her middle name is after the strongest person I know.”
“Did you only follow your brother’s dream and not yours?” He asked and I nodded my head. I would have loved to have been a writer but because I was always traveling or someone always needed something, there wasn’t any time.
“I wanted to be a writer.” I answered. Of course now I was in the middle of getting over a divorce and trying to raise my daughter.
“You still can be.”
“I haven’t found any interest in it. Once I started leaving my brother’s and I decided to get married it revolved all around that. I don’t really have time for it anymore.” I answered. I found that when I met new people I sort of just told them everything. Maybe that was a bad idea but I don’t really mind.
I sat in my car for a few minutes thinking about what I had said and I knew that that was the last straw and that Violet wasn’t going to let me see Ryder anymore. When I saw her walk past my car with the worker and he had the baby, I knew I fucked up.
I was beginning to regret everything that I had done to her. I totally fucked it all up and I think I was done. My life was over as I knew it.
*ONE MONTH LATER VIOLET P.O.V*
“Happy two months to Ryder Violet!” Brandon said when I walked into Starbucks where I was going to wait for him to get off work and he was taking me and Ryder out to dinner. I wasn’t exactly dating him but he was with us whenever he could be and he accepted the fact that I had a daughter.
Daniel hasn’t even bothered to talk to me since the last incident. I liked where this was going with Brandon though.
“How are you?” I asked when I walked to the counter.
“I’m good. How are you?” He asked as he handed me my drink.
“I’m good. Was up all night.” I answered.
“Oh. Why?” He asked as he came around the counter to hug me.
“She wasn’t feeling good last night.” I answered. It was always horrible when someone you love is sick but when it’s your eight week old, its even more horrible.
“You look exhausted.” He commented and I nodded my head. I knew I looked tired because I was.
“I am.” I answered. I didn’t really want to go out to dinner. I would rather stay home and take a nap but we all knew that I liked Brandon and I didn’t want to bail on him. “I need a nap.” I blurted out.
“Well I’m almost off and then we can go get some food and then you can go home and sleep.” He said smiling and I nodded before I went to sit down. Ryder was still asleep since she didn’t sleep at all last night so of course, she was out like a light. I brought my laptop with me to try and get some work done. I had started working for a magazine here in L.A that Brandon’s sister helped me get.
I didn’t exactly do much. Just wrote real stories and she published them if they were good enough. So far I have had two out of four that were published. The one I am working on now is about Daniel leaving me before giving birth and it seems to be coming along great. Ryder began making small noises and when I glanced down at her she was smiling up at me.
“Hi babygirl.” I said to her before reaching down and taking her out of the seat. She was wearing a pink onesie with a little pair of pink pants on over it. She can sit up a little so I sat her back against the couch and I moved over a little bit to catch her if she fell. I looked and noticed that Brandon was watching us and he held up one hand with all five fingers and I looked at the clock. He gets off in five minutes. I typed for a while longer before he came over and took a picture of me and Ryder.
“Ready?” He asked when he sat down and placed her on his lap playing with her hands.
“Yeah. Let me just finished this one paragraph.” I said before turning back to the laptop. Once I finished typing I sent it off to Harley for her to edit it. “Okay. Ready.” I said turning to find him asleep with Ryder on his chest. I giggled a little before I took a picture. I shook him awake before I took Ryder off his chest and placed her in her seat.
“Okay. Want me to drive?” He asked once we got out to the car.
“Sure.” And so, we were off.
*LATER THAT NIGHT*
“Am I allowed to come in?” Brandon asked when I drove back to the house. He claimed that he could walk back to Starbucks later but I have a feeling that it is not going to happen like that.
“Of course.” I said. It wasn’t too late so I knew I was going to be able to stay up a little longer. “Ryder needs a bath.” I said while I unlocked the door.
“Can I help?” He asked and I nodded.
“How are you so great with kids?” I asked him.
“My brother and my sister both have kids.” He answered. “My brother actually has three with another on the way. My sister has two.” He answered.
“How old is your brother?” I asked.
“Just turned thirty.” He answered.
“How old are the kids?” I asked.
“Thirteen, seven and four.” He answered. “He has his first kid at seventeen.” I nodded my head. One of my best friends had her first kid at eighteen.
“My brother had his first at nineteen.” I answered. “She was ten weeks early.” We both went into the bathroom and he held her while I stripped off her clothes and made sure that the water was just warm enough to not burn her skin but to not make her freeze either.
“Did she uh. Did she survive?” He asked looking at me and I nodded.
“Healthy six year old today.” I smiled. That kid had helped me survive for the past few years. I haven’t seen in her in a while and I feel like I should be there for her more often.
“Do you see her a lot?” He asked and I shook my head.
“Not since I had Ry.” I answered.
“What’s her name?”
“You should invite her over. I would love to meet her.” He said and I smiled. It wasn’t too late so Hayden might let her sleep over.
“We would have to go and pick her up.” I answered.
“I don’t want them to know where I live.” I answered. I finished washing up Ryder before I placed her in Brandon’s lap that had a towel on it. We walked into my bedroom where he laid her on the bed and put a diaper on her.
“Why are you like this?” He asked me. I didn’t take offense to it. I knew that there was pieces of me that were messed up and I knew I was weird.
“He hurt me. I don’t want anyone to hurt her.”
“She’s going to be hurt, Violet. People get their hearts broken all the time. You can’t hold her back.” He said and I nodded as he wrapped his arms around me.
“I’m sorry.” I whispered. I promised myself that I would never allow a guy to change my mind about anything and that I wouldn’t trust another guy but this isn’t just another guy. He accepted me even though I had already been through a divorce and had a child all before I was 25.
“Yeah, I’ll bring her buy. Or would you rather pick her up?” Hayden said into the phone.
“You can drop her off. I’ll text you the address.” I answered before hanging up and texting her the address. I sent Brandon off to get some snacks and drinks while I dressed Ryder and cleaned the house a little more.
*ONE HOUR LATER*
I heard a little knock on the door and went to answer it with Ryder in my arms. A little girl who goes by the name Ryan was standing at the door smiling up at me and she ran into my free arm.
“Hi, Auntie Vi!” She shouted and I giggled.
“Okay I have to go. We have no kids tonight so…” Hayden smirked before kissing Ryan and heading back off down the hallway.
“What are we going to do?” She asked.
“What would you like to do? I have a friend who went to get us some snacks. Should be back soon.” I answered. “We could watch a movie.” I said and she nodded her head.
“What ones do you have?!” She asked.
“Go look.” I pointed over to the place where all the movies were and she went running before I heard the door open and Brandon walked into the kitchen.
“Is that her?” He asked and I nodded my head. He went into the room with Ryder in his arms and sat down. “Are you Ryan?” He asked and I watched as she turned around and looked at him and sat across from him.
“Yes. Are you Auntie Vi’s friend?” She asked and he nodded his head.
“Where’s Uncle Daniel?” She asked looking over at me.
“Me and him aren’t together anymore.” I answered. It was going to be hard to explain to a child, How was I going to explain that to my own child. I wasn’t sure how much longer I would be able to do this on my own. I had so much help I knew that but I am her mother and I need to be there for her but I’m not really sure how.
We decided to watch a movie so we were all cuddled on the couch with Ryder in the bouncy seat in front of us fast asleep. Ryan fell asleep and Brandon moved her into the guest bedroom for me.
“Do you uh, want to stay over?” I asked. “It’s late and I don’t want you driving.” I said and he nodded his head as he stretched out. “The bed or the couch?”
“Do you mind if I sleep in the bed?” He asked and I shook my head.
“Not at all. Just keep your hands to yourself.” I answered before picking up Ryder and going into the bedroom. She slept on my chest and I fell asleep to Brandon’s breathing. It was the best sleep I have gotten in months.