Since I published the piece of writing about Daniel and Ryder, I have gotten a million hits. I even got a call from Ellen to come onto her show so here I was, backstage at her show. I was more than excited to meet her and to be able to talk about the piece of writing. I had also decided to make it into a book so it will be longer.
“Please welcome, Violet Brooks.” I heard the crowd cheer and clap before I walked out smiling and waving. There were some younger girls in the audience that I’m sure knew my brothers.
“So nice to meet you!” She said to me as I hugged her.
“You too!” I said as we both stood for a few seconds longer before we sat down.
“So, tell me about this piece of writing.” She said as she sat back and I also sat back. My back always hurt from holding Ryder.
“Well, a little less than two years ago I got married to a man named Daniel, who I had been with since I was sixteen. I was thirty weeks pregnant and he had decided that he wasn’t where he was suppose to be. So we got a divorce and two weeks later I gave birth to my beautiful daughter.” I said before a picture of her and I popped up on the screen behind us and the crowd awed and I looked at the picture.
“Whats her name? How old is she?”
“Her name is Ryder Violet Brooks and she is 9 weeks old.” I smiled.
“Are you mad about everything that has happened to you?”
“No. I’m not. Of course I never saw it coming because we were happy. Of course we had our issues, everyone does. But he had decided that he wanted more in life and obviously it didn’t involve children. Clearly me and that child are a package deal and I would never leave her. Sadly I gave up so much to be with him. I traveled the world with him and my brothers for years. I’m more mad at myself because I do everything that everyone else wants but nothing that I want. I just wish I could give that child more.”
“Who are your brothers?” She asked.
“Beau, Luke and Jai Brooks. They were youtube famous.” I answered. “I haven’t spoken to them in a while.” I answered.
“I’ve met them. I didn’t know that they had a little sister.” She answered.
“No one really does. Only the fans.” I smiled.
“So are you going to be making a sequel thing to this little article?” She asked.
“Well, I am going to make it into a book so for everyone who wants the whole story, they are going to get it.” I said smiling. I was nearly halfway done with it. I had just gotten up to the part where I had gotten the divorce papers and moved out all on the same day. The book wasn’t going to be long. It hasn’t been that long since it all went down so how could I further the book without anything happening. “I’m almost done with it.”
“How do you find time to write?” She asked. “Does someone watch the baby?”
“No. No one watches her besides me. I don’t really trust anyone. But I write when she sleeps. She’s very quiet and rarely ever cries so I can usually get three or four chapters done a day give or take how much laundry I have.” I answered and she laughed.
“Who is she with right now?” She asked.
“She’s back stage with my friend Brandon who came here with me. He was nervous about leaving her. I’m not sure why.”
“I loved to meet her!” She said.
“He can bring her out.” I said and when I turned around there he was smiling real big and carrying my baby girl. He placed her in my arms and I glanced down at her and she was staring back up at me. Brandon hugged Ellen before he sat next to me and we all looked over at the baby.
“She’s just so beautiful.”
“Would you like to hold her?” I asked and she nodded her head. I slowly placed Ryder in her arms and Ellen played with her hand.
“We’ll be back after this!” She said and the crowd stood and clapped. We all walked backstage where we sat with Ellen for a few more minutes before she had to go back out and meet the next person.
“I love that woman.” I said to Brandon as he drove back to my apartment. He was spending nearly every night here. He refused to leave us if he didn’t have to. Of course he helped pay some of the bills since he was also living here. It wasn’t much but we each paid what we could. Ryder began to whine in the back. She usually never whines so she must be very hungry. We had about another hour before we would be home. “Can you pull over?” I asked. I should feed her before it gets too late and we can’t stop and she won’t stop crying. He pulled off the highway and we went to a little rest area where he went inside to get some food and I fed Ryder.
“I could hear people complaining about you breast feeding.” Brandon said when he came back. I rolled my eyes. I was in my car! Why were you look towards my car? It’s not like I was having sex.
“That just pisses me off.” I answered. I had already used all of the bottles where I had pumped so this was the only way that I could feed her. “This is the only way that I could feed her until we got home.” I commented. “They shouldn’t have looked this way if they didn’t want to see it.” I added. My kid was hungry I wasn’t going to let her starve.
“Don’t worry about them.” I couldn’t be more thankful to have someone like Brandon in my life. We weren’t exactly dating but we weren’t exactly not dating either. “They don’t understand it.”
“Who does?” I answered. He sure as hell didn’t understand it. He never answered me after that I knew exactly what that meant. I ate after I was done feeding Ry and we were on our way. Ry and I both fell asleep for the last hour of the car ride and I woke up with a kink in my neck. Brandon came up to the apartment with me where we both took a nap before Ryder woke us again and he took a shower.
“I gotta head home. Make sure everything is good. That the dog is fed.” He said before kissing me and Ryder on the cheek and heading out the door. I offered to let him bring the dog here but he said no, that he didn’t want Ryder around him. I was going to let him do whatever because he probably wasn’t going to stay anyway.
I pulled up to my house to see my very cheerful wife standing in the window waiting for me. We had gotten married a few months before I met Violet. I felt guilt wash over me before I put on a smile and entered the house. She wrapped me in a hug and I could tell that she had been crying but she was smiling. I looked at her confused.
“Why are you crying?” I asked. “What happened?”
“Nothing bad. I have news.” She said and I looked at her waiting for her to further what she was going to say. “I’m pregnant.” She said and my jaw dropped. I had to think really quick because if I didn’t give her the right reaction she would freak out.
“Are you serious?” I smiled and she nodded her head. I wrapped her in a hug and my smile faded and I was mentally punching myself. What was I going to do about Violet?
*ONE MONTH LATER VIOLET P.O.V*
I was walking into Starbucks when I saw Brandon talking to a girl with blonde hair and she was very short. She kept touching his arm and I looked at them while sitting next to a table right next to the door. I saw him lean closer to her and the breath caught in the back of my throat before I got up and walked out. Either he was dating her or they had a really weird relationship. I went back to my car where I got Ryder in and I sat in the front seat and I screamed as tears poured down my face and I slammed my hands on the steering wheel a few times. I quickly started the car before heading home.
I got many calls from Brandon asking where I was and I didn’t answer any of them. I figured he might come by the house and I would rather do this in person. A few hours later there was a knock on the door and I slowly went to answer it as he pounded on it again.
“What?” I asked when I opened the door.
“Where were you earlier?” He asked trying to come into the house but I stepped in front of him so he couldn’t. “What’s going on?” He asked.
“Who is she?” I asked.
“Who’s who?” He asked.
“Stop acting like you don’t know what I’m talking about! Who was that girl you were kissing at your work?!” I shouted at him. I knew I should have never trusted him. I knew I would get hurt.
“If you let me in I can explain.” He said sighing and I stood to the side letting him in. “Where’s Ryder?” He asked.
“Sleeping. You aren’t allowed to see her anymore.” I answered. “Now explain.”
“She’s my wife.” He answered and I wanted to smack him across the face. “And she’s pregnant.” Now I really wanted to smack him.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I asked as I paced around the room. “You have got to be kidding me.”
“I’m not.” I ran my hands through my hair I wasn’t sure what to do. I knew I couldn’t be with him because he had a family and a fucking wife.
“Does she have any idea that you cheated on her?” I asked him as I stood in place and he shook his head. “I think you should leave.” I said and he got up before he opened the door and he left. I sat there watching the door. How could he do that to her? He had a wife! Who does that? She’s pregnant and he was cheating on her. I was so sick of this world. Maybe I should move away from L.A but I knew that I couldn’t move across the country with a baby all on my own. I couldn’t even cry. All I could do was sit there.
I wasn’t sure how long I sat outside looking at her door to see if she would come out or if I could hear movement inside the apartment but I never did. Eventually my wife called and said I needed to come home so I got off my ass and went to my car.
“Where have you been?” She asked when I walked in the front door.
“Out with some friends.” I answered.
“I have a doctors appointment soon, would you like to come?” She asked me.
“Sure.” I answered. I’m thinking that we might have had a honeymoon baby. We had to take a late honeymoon so we went about two months. I’m thinking that she might be 8 weeks pregnant but I could be wrong.
*ONE MONTH LATER *
So I was totally wrong. She was a lot farther along than we thought. Meaning that she got pregnant before we got married. I hadn’t talked to Violet at all. I had seen her a few times walking around with Ryder on her hip. Ryder was almost four months old. I guess I owed it to Violet for showing me how to take care of a baby.
“Would you like to pick a few names for the baby?” Kassidy came into the room I was in.
“Sure.” We were having a little girl and I was pretty excited but I was hiding the sadness from Kass. I started writing down a few names and I found myself writing Violet and Ryder’s names on the paper.
“Oh! I love Violet!” Kassidy said and I mentally hit myself. I should not have wrote that down. “What about a middle name?”
“How about Grace?” I asked and she nodded her head.
“Yes! I love it!” She shouted and Kissed me. I totally fucked up.
It was crazy that my baby girl was four months old! The time went by so quickly and I didn’t want her to grow up. Brandon’s sister was nice enough to let me keep my job even though me and Brandon weren’t friends anymore. I had finished my book and I was sending it off to the publisher soon. I was just rereading it to make sure that everything seemed right and that I took things out that didn’t make sense.
I added everything that happened with Brandon because I knew I was right. I wish I had known before so I didn’t have to go through all of that again and drag my daughter through it. Of course she had no idea what was going on but I had so much guilt that I would never be able to give her a dad and that really pain me. I grew up without a dad and all I wanted for her to was a happy family but she wasn’t going to get that and I’m so sorry for that.