DEEP DARK AND DANGEROUS
“Jared, we are so stupid. I’m on my period, I can’t get pregnant.” I said to him when we were in the shower and he laughed.
“I forgot you had your period.” He said running his hands up and down my sides. “Well good.” He smiled and kissed me. Today we would be walking around Boston while Heather and Liam spend some time together. They had booked us a table at some dinner place tonight and told us to dress up so I was excited.
“Okay, hurry up. I’m ready to go and explore.” I said to him as I got out of the shower. I put on a purple tank top and jean shorts. I also put a clip in my hair at the top of my head. He had styled his hair up in the front and wore a black shirt with a pair of white shorts.
“Ready?” He asked while I grabbed my bag and threw it over my head to have it over my shoulder and against my side.
“Yup.” I grabbed his hand as we walked out the door and down to the city. Oh how I loved the city.
I loved watching Ryan. I loved watching her do anything. She was walking ahead of me and every so often she would turn around and make sure I was still right with her. Every time she turned around I would smile at her and she would smile back at me. I didn’t want to admit but I was so in love with her. I haven’t really said those words to her but I say them in my head every single day.
“Are you hungry?” I asked her and she shook her head no as she headed into a store and I followed behind her. I wrapped my arms around her and rested my head on her shoulder and I watched everything she would pick up and she would laugh and show me and I would smile. Last night while she was sleeping I snuck out and bought her a promise ring. I let go of her while she looked at the same spot and I got down on one knee and when she turned around she gasped.
“What are you doing?” She asked me and I just put my finger over my mouth to tell her to be quiet.
“Ryan, we have been dating for almost a year and I don’t say it all the time but I love you so much. I would love if you would take this promise ring. I promise to be there for you in the hard times. And when your mother’s death get’s a little too tough and you need to cry, I’ll tuck you into bed and let you cry until you have soaked my shirts. When you’re stressed from school lay down in bed and I’ll take care of it for you. Most of all I promise to love you.” I smiled up at her and I could tell she was about to cry. “Ryan, will you promise to love me?” I asked her and she cried.
“Yes!” She nearly shouted and I stood up and wrapped her in my arms and held her up.
“I love you so much.” I said kissing the side of her head.
“I love you too.” I bought her a plain ring. Just a silver band a gold heart on it. I placed the ring on her finger and she admired it before she looked up at me and kissed me. “It’s beautiful.” She said as she grabbed my hand and we continued walking. “Hey, babe?” She asked after a while and I looked over at her.
“Yes?” I asked her.
“I’m starving. You need to feed me.” She said putting both her hands on her hips and glaring at me.
“What would you like?” I asked her.
“Pizza.” She answered and raised her eyebrows. She got them done yesterday and they look pretty good to me.
“Whatever you want.” I answered.
“So, you know that show I was watching on Netflix last night?” She asked me and I nodded my head.
“What was it called again?” I asked.
“The Carrie Diaries!” She said smiling. “It’s such a great show!”
“It makes you cry a lot.” I said. She usually watched it with her headphones in so I couldn’t hear what was happening but I could hear her sobbing from some things and I just wanted to hug her but I watched her. Again, another thing I watched her do.
“Okay. I know. Besides that!” She said. “Will you watch it with me sometime?” She asked.
“Are you going to cry?” I asked her and she nodded her head.
“But this time you’ll be with me.” She smiled at me before I ordered her a piece of pizza. “Thanks.” She said taking it from me.
“Welcome.” I answered. “Ryan?” I asked and she looked up at me. I wasn’t sure what I was going to say from there. I wasn’t much of a writer like she was. I didn’t know much about love. I hope she would though. “I’m not sure what I was going to say.” She laughed before she wrapped an arm around me.
“I think I know.” She said. “I can see it in your eyes. You don’t have to say it.” She said. “And I love you too.” She said before she walked away and I smiled at the ground and followed behind her. Once I reached her she grabbed my hand and pulled me to her. “Kiss me.” She whispered.
“Right here? In the middle of the city?” I asked and she nodded her head. I shrugged before I pulled her into me and pressed my lips to hers. She grabbed my face as she did and her mouth tasted like Pizza.
“You taste like pizza.” I said smiling and she laughed.
“You’re welcome.” She moved back away from me and grabbed my hand. “I say we go back to the hotel and get naked.” I shrugged.
“I’m cool with that.” I answered. The walk was a little ways away so we just talked.
“What do you think your mom and Liam are doing?” She asked.
“I hope they’re having a good time.”
“We are going on duck boat tours?” I asked Liam.
“Yes we are. You’ll love it.” He said as he grabbed my hand. “Maybe we can bring the kids tomorrow.” He said. I know Ryan wasn’t mine but I pictured her as mine. I was glad that he let those two kids be apart of his life. He invited them everywhere. Of course he asked them if he could be with just be today and they agreed. I hope they weren’t getting into too much trouble. “What are you worried about?” He asked.
“The kids. Worried about what they are doing.”
“I’m sure they will be fine.” He answered. I wasn’t so sure.
Jared literally slammed me against the wall and smashed his lips to my neck. I moaned out. I should have known that he was going to do this to me.
“What?” He asked when he pulled back.
“The bed is right there.” I said laughing and he looked over at it.
“Bed’s are for amateurs.” He smirked at me before he got back to what he was doing before. He pulled his pants down and got to shorts and panties to the side.
“Fuck.” I moaned out.
“Mmm, what baby?” He whispered.
“It feels so good.” I moaned out again. “Harder.”
“Boston is Beautiful.” Liam said to me and I nodded agreeing. The sun was just about the set and the sky was a lovely shade of pink.
“I couldn’t agree more.” I answered.
“Wanna know what’s even more beautiful?” He asked and I looked at him.
“You.” He said. Then he sighed and I couldn’t figure it out why.
“What’s wrong?” I asked him.
“Would you ever get remarried?” He asked me.
“It’s up to what Jared thinks really. If he doesn’t approve then I’m not going to force it on him. I will never put a man before my children. That’s why I got a divorce in the first place.” I answered.
“Do you think both of them would allow us to get married if we wanted?”
“I think so. They like you.”
“I think they only like me because I told them I would buy them both ferrari’s.” He said and I laughed.
“Well, if you promised, you can’t break it. They are both big about that.”
“I’m not going to break anything I promised them.”
“Good.” I smiled at him and he poured me more wine before he wrapped an arm around my waist. “Do you have any kids?” He had never told me if he did. I don’t think he would mind.
“I had a ten year old daughter.” I looked over at him.
“Had?” I asked.
“She uh, she passed in a car accident with my wife. She died on impact. My wife didn’t.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“She would have been eighteen in May.”
“You had her young.” I said.
“Yeah. I did.” He answered. “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
“No I do. I’m sure she was lovely. I’d love to hear all about her.” I smiled at him. “What did she look like?” I asked.
“She had blonde hair and brown eyes. She had the cutest little nose and she had freckles.”
“She looked like you.” He nodded smiling.
“Exactly like me.” He said and I smiled. “I like to think that she would look like Ryan.”
“She is beautiful. More than any girl I’ve ever seen in my life before.”
“That’s why I picture my daughter looking at her. Ryan just has lighter hair and blue eyes.” He said and I nodded. “I love being apart of those kids life. I picture them like my own kids.” I smiled and I felt like my heart was going to explode.
“Thank you.” I said to him.
“For what?” He asked.
“Being there for them. Neither one of them really had a dad. Their dads were jackasses and you’re the first thing they look at when they look for a father figure. You may have lost your child, but you gained two more.”