DEEP AND DARK AND DANGEROUS
“Ryan, I want you to meet my parents.” Jared said to me. I looked at him. We were sitting on a rock in the woods behind our school.
“I guess.” He looked back at me. “Whats wrong?”
“They wont like me.” I said. I had this fear that his parents wouldn’t like me. They seem like they are rich and all fancy and... I just don’t know.
“Ryan, are you crazy? I haven’t stopped talking about you. They wanna meet you.” He said.
“Thats not it. What if they see everything about me, that I have depression. That I’ve cut before-”
“You what?!”He almost yelled. “Lets me see your arms.” He said and pulled my sleeves up. “Ryan.” I pulled my pants up too.
“ ‘Softball’. Wrong.” I said.
“Ryan please stop.” He said.
“I’m doing my best. Its been three weeks.” I said. He looked at me.
“Three weeks since he left too.” He knew about my ex, Zach. I looked down at the ground.
“He fills my every thought.” I said. “You fill my heart.” I looked up at him. I saw a smile creep up onto his face.
“Please just meet them.” I rolled my eyes.
“When?” I asked smiling.
“Right now.” He said as he helped me stand up and nearly ran to his car. “I don’t care what they say about you. Its not changing my mind.” He said. I smiled at him. We both got into his car and he drove down the road. We came to the edge of the woods where he turned onto a random road. There was trees everywhere. When we pulled up to his house it was huge. There was a big garage and the house was ten times bigger than any house I had ever seen. I thought my house was big. Their house was huge.
“Wait. Are you sure about this?” I asked. I looked up at the big house. “They seem like they wouldn’t like a girl like me.” I looked down at the ground.
“Ryan, they will love you.” He lifted my chin up. I didn’t really believe him. We walked up to the front door that was all glass. He opened the door and stood to the side so I could walk in. He walked in behind me and closed the door behind us. “Mom? Dad?” He shouted out.
“In the kitchen!” We heard someone call back. He walked up the steps to the kitchen. The kitchen was very open. It had white cabinets with Silver knobs. The dishwasher, stove and fridge were also silver. “I was making-” A women stood at the stove. “Who’s this?” She asked.
“Mom, this is Ryanne.” He said. She looked at me.
“Well you’re beautiful.” I blushed.
“Thank you.” I said. No one really called me Ryanne but my parents when I did something bad.
“We were having tacos for dinner would you like to stay?” She asked. I loved tacos.
“Sure, thank you.” I said as Jared led me to the island where we could sit. We talked for a little while longer until Jared got up.
“I’ll show you the rest of the house.” He said and led me to the living room. “The living room.” He said and we walked up the stairs. He pointed to different rooms telling me what was what. We reached the last door in the hallway. “My room.” He said as he swung the door open.
“Wow. My house is much smaller and we have the same size room.” I said laughing. He had a few hockey posters hung up on the walls that were white. His closet was huge. He walked into the room as I looked around and sat on the bed. Once I walked in the room more and I was close enough to him he pulled me so I was standing in between his legs. He held my waist as I stood where I was with my hands on his shoulders.
“DINNER!” His mom called us down the stairs. I pulled back but Jared pulled me back into his body. I giggled.
“What are you doing?” I question him. He just laid his head on my chest. I ran my hands through his almost black hair. A few minutes later he let go and led me down the stairs. We sat down at the table together.
“Where’s dad?” Jared asked. The way he mentioned his father, he didn’t have a very good relationship with his father in my opinion. I stayed quiet because I knew how he felt. We never saw my dad either. After the divorce we see him on birthday’s and holidays. Other than that he sends his child support and goes on drinking his life away.
“Not sure, Jared. Haven’t heard from him or seen him since this morning.” She said sighing. Jared put his taco down.
“I’m going upstairs.” He said and left the room. I let him relax a little before I went up the stairs.
“Jared?” I asked as I walked into his room. He wasn’t in there. I looked around the room. There was a smashed picture. When I looked at the picture it was of Jared and his dad I assumed. I picked the picture up.
“He’s an asshole.” I heard Jared behind me. I turned around. His eyes had turned from its light blue to almost a dark brown. I went to hand him the picture but he smacked it out of my hands. I was scared. He got closer to me. I tried to run but he pushed me up against the wall. “You’re not going anywhere.” He said to me. I started breathing heavier as his fist hit the wall next to my head. I closed my eyes as I felt some of the wall crumple to pieces and fall next to my foot. I felt my eyes fill with tears.
“Jared.” I said calmly hoping to calm him down.
“RYANNE!” He yelled. I was shocked. He knew I hated that name. He smashed his fist into the wall on the other side of my head and above my head. I let the tears spill from my eyes. I could hear his breathing changing as he tried to calm himself down. He sat down on the floor a few feet away from me. I debated on running for my life but I knew he needed me. I walked up behind him and rubbed my hands through his hair. I heard his breathing change as his heart slowed. He got up and hugged me. “I’m sorry.” He was almost in tears.
“Its okay.” We walked over to his bed and laid down in each others arms while he calmed down. I rubbed my hands along his arms and his back doing my best to calm him down. Eventually he fell asleep. His mom came in a few minutes later.
“Just making sure you’re still alive.” She laughed a little at herself. She was quiet enough to not wake him. “I work with your mom, she said its fine if you spend the night here. She knows Jared needs you just as much as you need him.”
“Okay thanks.” I smiled at her. It was still a little early when Jared woke up. “Hey.” I said as he sat up.
“Shit, I need to drive you home.” He said as he quickly got off the bed and walked into the bathroom.
“Jared, your mom said I could spend the night.” I walked into the bathroom where he was peeing. “Opps. Sorry.” I giggled.
“She said you could stay the night?” He said.
“Our moms are friends. They work together.” I said as I walked into the bathroom further. He finished and washed his hands.
“Hmm.” Was all he said. We walked back into his room. “Wanna go pick up some snacks?” He asked as he grabbed his keys.
“Sure.” I said as he took my hand and we both walked down the stairs.
“We are gonna go get some snacks.” He said to his mom. As we walked out the front door his dad was on the porch. “Dad?” Jared asked. His dad turned around. He was on the phone.
“Not now, Jared.” His dad nearly yelled at him. Jared pushed passed him with his hand still in mine and got into the car. He started the car and drove down the drive way.
“God. I fucking hate him!” He yelled and slammed his fist on the steering wheel. I rubbed my hand along his thigh. I could feel him calm down at my touch. I rubbed the arm that he had resting on the arm rest between us.
“I know whats it like to have a dick for a dad. My parents are divorced. We never see him.” I said in a small voice to not make him mad. He grabbed my hand and rubbed his thumb over the top side of my hand. I smiled as he looked at me.
“My parents are getting a divorce.” He blurted out.
“I figured they would be.” I said. He turned the radio on after that. You could tell Jared had a past. It might be from fighting or something else. You could tell he had gotten into some type of trouble before he came here. I didn’t want to upset him anymore than he was already upset. “Where are we gonna go for snacks?” I asked him.
“Not sure. I just wanted to go for a ride.” He said. I started to freak out a little thinking he was going to kill me. He grabbed my hand and smiled at me. “We can go where you want.” He said. I wasn’t really sure where to go.
“Oh. There’s a store right there. Lets try there.” I said. He pulled into the almost empty parking lot. We both got out and walked into the store. He grabbed my hand. The few people that were in the store looked at us. Jared pulled me close to his body. We picked out the few snacks and Jared paid.
“I didn’t like that store. Never go there alone.” He said looking at me.
“I wont.” We drove back to his house. I could tell he didn’t want to go back. He didn’t want to go and deal with his father.
“Am I bad person?” He asked me.
“What? Of course not!” I said.
“Then why doesn’t my dad like me?” He asked. I didn’t really know what to say.
“Because he cares more about himself than he does anybody else.” I said. I wasn’t lying. He cared more about work, and making money than caring about his own son. I could tell just by the way he yelled at Jared when he was on the phone that I was right. I was different than most girls. Most girls would try to make their friend feel better. I made them feel better but I also watched their actions, the other person actions. Jared gets angry easily but its never his fault. At the mention of his father, he will get mad.
We pulled into the drive way a few minutes later. We walked up around the house and through the back door that led into the living room. His dad was sitting on the couch watching football and his mom was reading a book.
“This a new whore you’re gonna be with?” His dad asked. My jaw dropped as I felt my eyes fill with tears.
“Dad!” Jared yelled.
“Robert! Why would you say that?!” His mom yelled. I couldn’t help but let the small tears roll down my check. I wasn’t really sure what to do so I just turned around and walked out the door. Both Jared’s mom and Jared came after me.
“Ryan!” Jared yelled as he grabbed my arm.
“How could he say that?! I’m not a whore! I’ve had one boyfriend! We never even had sex!” I yelled. I sat down on the grass. Jared sat down next to me and wrapped his arms around me. He held my head to his chest as I cried. I could feel his mom standing there. She sat down next to us. She rubbed my back. I cried some more. Eventually the sun was setting and it was getting cooler. Jared picked me up and brought me inside. The house was light up. He walked up the stairs where he placed me on his bed.
“Here.” He handed me a shirt. He helped me put it on since he knew I was too weak. We laid down and watched a movie until the point where I fell asleep. All I remember was him rubbing my back and fall asleep in his arms. It felt right.