7. Chapter 6
It's been a week since Nash asked me to be his girlfriend. Cam didn't leave us alone for the first few days about the whole thing.
"ARIANAAAAAAAA" someone called downstairs
I sighed as I set my song book on the side and made my way downstairs.
"Cameron what do you want" I laughed when I saw him at the bottom of my stairs
"To hang dur" he shrugged
"Where's Nash?" I asked
"With his mom I think" he answered
"Oh, alright" I nodded
"Come on then silly" he chuckled
I laughed and followed him into the living room.
"What do you want to do?" I asked
"I don't know, I didn't really think this through" he admitted
I giggled and put the TV on and then Netflix.
"This good enough?" I asked as I put the walking dead on (ik this isn't actually on Netflix)
"Yep" he grinned
"Good" I laughed sitting beside him
After the episode finished I turned to Cam.
"How comes you come here?" I frowned
"Why wouldn't i?" He asked
"Well it's" I mumbled
"Ari, we're friends now, friends hang" he laughed
"I know, it's just it's still weird sometimes, I feel like I don't belong" I admitted
"Of course you do" he frowned
"Thanks" I nodded
"I'm going to pee" he chucked standing up
I nodded and snuggled back into the couch. After about 10 minutes I started to worry. Why hadn't he come back down?
I stood up and made my way upstairs. I opened the bathroom door, which was empty. I frowned and headed to my bed room. I pushed the door open slowly and saw Cam sitting at my dressing table with his back to me.
"Cam?" I frowned
He jumped at the sound of my voice and that's when I saw it. My songbook. I felt the anger rise up my body.
"Ari" he began
"What do you think you're doing" I yelled, lucky I was home alone
"I'm sorry, I was just looking around cause I've never really been up and" he started
"And what!? You thought it was ok to read through my stuff!" I screamed
My songbook was my sanctuary. I wrote down the words I couldn't say out loud and made them into songs. It helped me to get through shit.
"I'm really sorry" he apologised
"Just leave" I ordered
"Ari" he began
"LEAVE" I cried
I watched the shock in his face appear and quickly fade. He gave a sympathetic look before walking past me. I waited until I heard the door shut and then I cried.
I felt so many emotions all at once, hurt, anger, sadness, shock, embarrassed, and I just couldn't take it. I walked over and looked down at my song book. It was on a song called "Outside Looking In". I had finished writing it about 2 months before I met Nash, it was about me. I just felt alone, I had friends, but at the same time I didn't, they weren't really friends, we didn't hang out after school or do stuff at the weekends. They were just to help me get through.
I looked at my keyboard and shook my head. I grabbed my book and headed downstairs. I walked into the library room and looked at the grand piano sitting in the middle of the room.
I didn't really use it because I had the keyboard upstairs... I put my song book on the stand and started playing the chords.
"You don't know my name
You don't know anything about me
I try to play nice
I want to be in your game
The things that you say
You may think that I never hear about them
But word travels fast
I'm telling you to your face
I'm standing here behind your back" I sung
I could feel tears forming. This song described my life so perfectly 3 months ago. I was all alone. I had no one. I wanted to curl up and die. Then Nash came along and saved me from myself. I let myself smile slightly before playing the chorus.
"You don't know how it feels
To be outside the crowd
You don't know how it feels
To be left out
And you don't know how it feels
To be your own best friend on the outside looking in
If you could read my mind
You might see more of me than meets the eye
And you've been all wrong
Not who you think I am
You've never given me a chance
Well I'm tired of staying at home
I'm bored and all alone
I'm sick of wasting all my time" I ended
I had cut out a lot of the actual song. Because it was making me sad singing it.
"That was great" a voice behind me spoke
I froze in my sit. Shit. They heard. I spun round to see Nash.
"How long have you been there?" I frowned
"Long enough" he replied
"How long" I asked again
"I saw you cry" he slightly smiled
"Why didn't you stop me" I mumbled
"Because I knew you would stop singing" he admitted
"Oh" was all I could say
I watched as he come and sat beside me.
"What was the song about?" He asked
"Me" I nodded
"Why?" He frowned
"It was a few months before I met you, and it's exactly how I felt" I shrugged
"I'm sorry" he looked down
"Don't be, you saved me" I gently nudged him
He looked back up and smiled before he asked the question I was dreading the most.
"So how comes you've never played on this piano before?"