Chapter 14: I Want You To Be More Than My Best Friend
"Where are you going?" Brody asked as I pushed myself off of the couch and started walking towards the door. Jackson, Katy, Brody and I all crowded into Katy's dressing room to watch the Hunger Games interview. It's halfway through Kendall's, Woody and Francis' and well... I can't watch it at the moment. It's not the live version so I can catch up on it anytime.
Before answering I walked out and rushed towards my trailer, the minute the door was shut I kicked the cabinet; swore and fell on the sofa before burying my face into one of the cushions. My phone buzzed in my pocket again but I didn't bother checking it, I know who it is and I can't talk to her right now.
I'm not going to kid myself anymore. I like Kendall, like a lot. I have since the first day I met her but I just kept lying to myself and to everyone around me. But seriously who am I kidding? Brody's guessed and gotten it right which meant he told Jackson and Katy. They guessed after a month of us being here, now on the sixth Kendall still has no clue which shocked me a bit. Seriously, I'm making it extremely obvious that I like her and she's still not seeing it.
I have no idea what to do 'cause I can't just walk up to her and say "oh yeah, I kinda sorta like you and everyone knows it so what's happening between us?" now can I? And don't you think I've tried to tell her I have this humongous crush on her? Every time something either gets in the way or I chicken out and end up mentally stabbing myself for being so pathetic. Danny didn't get so freaked out or worried about asking out Cece. Well, he was nervous to death and it took him three attempts but she had already guessed it and had this huge crush on him too so it made it easier on Danny. I don't know how Kendall feels about me at the moment, of course ignoring her isn't going to help.
I don't really know what to do and it's freaking me out about how much I like Kendall. She's on my mind nearly 24/7 - the only times she isn't is because we're shooting a scene but the instant the scene ends BAM! My mind is somewhere else with Kendall.
That's why I got so jealous of Romeo, because I liked Kendall and the way he looked at her just made me angry. That and the fact that Twitter was always blowing up with the 'Rendall' drama and I felt like it would never be me in Romeo's position. Then when Kendall forgave me I tried to control myself from starting any drama because I didn't want her to get mad at me or for me to get mad at her. Everything can get thrown way out of proportion when in mine and Kendall's position because there's always people trying to bug into our personal life's, scooping for any little line that they can twist and start a rumor.
"Ugh." I groaned as my phone started ringing loudly, Kendall's name on the ID but I just threw it onto the sofa opposite me before stuffing my face back into my cushion.
++2 hours later++
The continuous banging on my trailer door made me fall of the sofa and wake me up. Shit, I didn't even mean to fall asleep. The banging just got louder and louder with each slam, making me throw the door open with my ears ringing. I sighed and walked into the kitchen area leaving the door open.
"Okay what the hell is your problem?" Kendall said slamming the door shut after her.
"Just leave it." I snapped resting my elbows on the counter and taking a drink from the glass coke bottle before scrunching my nose up at the taste and chucking the remaining contents down the sink. I bit into a mint before turning back to Kendall who's looking pretty confused and upset. My breath caught in my throat at the sight, I shouldn't have snapped at her.
Way to go Cowell, make her hate your fucking guts why don't you?
"I don't get it." She said gently after a little while.
"Don't get what?" I asked suddenly becoming aware of the distance between us. She's a couple steps from the door whilst I'm on the other side of the trailer so if I say something stupid I won't be able to stop her from leaving.
"You were fin- no estatic about the idea of doing a movie. You kept telling me how great it's going to be and that this can start off our acting careers if we wanted them to." She spoke. "Then I get offered a second movie and all of a sudden you're ignoring me and acting like we're complete strangers. Last time I checked I didn't do anything wrong... so why are you so mad at me?"
"I'm not mad at you." I sighed and rubbed my forehead with my hand. "I'm jus-, just mad at myself."
She made eye contact with me now and my hand dropped down to my side. "Why?"
"Because... because I need to say something really important that I've been dying to say for two years now but I-I... can't. It just won't come out the way I want it too and I feel so stupid for taking it out on you." I blurted out. "I'm really sorry Kendall, I really really am so glad that you got offered another role in a movie and I wish I could have been a better friend these past couple days."
She stayed silent as I took another breath before continuing. "I just thought I was going to lose you all over again." I whispered.
"Zack." She said gently and then all of a sudden she's only two steps away from me. Nearly arm's length. "I'm always going to be your best friend, no matter what happens. You're never gonna lose me."
But I want you to be more than my best friend. I thought.
"What do you need tell me?" She asked.
I shook my head and bit my lip, adding a shrug as well.
"I know you have something to tell me. You just told me." She said making me crack a smile. "You can tell me anything."
"I know." I whispered freezing when my eyes locked with hers. I've heard a whole bunch of people saying that they can make you get lost in them so easily and they're right. I took another shaky breath, clenching and then unclenching my hands again. "I just don't know how to say it."
She nodded and pursed her lips before slapping her hands against the outsides of her thighs. "Okay." She said then turned round so she was no longer facing me. "How about we go get some fo-"
She didn't get to finish her sentence because I just didn't think. My hands flew out, gripping her hips and spinning her round before cupping her cheeks and pulling her closer to me. That didn't cut her off because it happened in a split second, in fact the word 'food' was still playing at her lips. What cut her off was my own lips pressing themselves against hers.
At first she stood frozen but after about two seconds we both relaxed and our lips started moving on their accord like we've both been kissing people our whole life's. I wrapped my arms tightly around her waist, leaving no space between us what-so-ever and a smile slipped onto my face as Kendall wrapped her own arms around my neck, pulling my head closer towards hers. She moved onto her tiptoes which let me keep my head straight as I kissed her, butterflies just exploding left, right and center in my body.
After a while we both pulled apart for air, leaving us breathing heavily with my forehead pressed up against Kendall's. She slowly sank back down onto her feet properly, my head ducking down with her until I opened my eyes and saw her already looking up at me.
"I want you to be more than my best friend." I whispered out loud this time.
She smiled revealing her perfectly straight and bright white teeth, her eyes gleamed over and both of her dimples came into view. In response she lent back up, her soft lips back in contact with mine which moved instantly with hers.
"I'm going to take that as a yes." I breathed out when she moved her head again.
"Well done genius." I heard her mumble, I would have acted offended like usual but all I did was smile at her and shake my head a little, tightening my grip on her waist.