I want to experience love. If I could have a boyfriend casually in my closet that would be nice. I would get him whenever I wanted and he would look at me like I'm beautiful. Like boys did in the movies. He would have dark curly hair and would sport a leather jacket and a pair of nice fitting jeans. Not like it would matter what he's wearing because he'd be breathing hard as he took of his jacket and unbuckled his jeans. He'd run his fingers along me giving me goosebumps and he'd whisper sweet nothings into my ear. I'd probably pass out from his hotness. But as he undressed me he would whisper the most important words in the universe "I love you Bridget.".
I flicked on my bedside light and grabbed a pen and my journal. I turned to the very last page.I wrote the words To make love to someone in the tenth slot of my list. My bucket list.
Slowly then did my door creek open and my little sister's head pop in. "Mom said come downstairs now."
I snatch a pilllow from under my head and toss it at her "GO AWAY!" I yell. She turns and slams the door behind her.I rest my head against my pillow again and listen to the commotion going on downstairs. I haven't been down there in weeks. But I can Imagine my mother tossing salad, the lettuce spilling from the bowl now and then along with drips of salad dressing. The sound of the wooden spoon beating against the bowl.My father taking time out to use the outside grill. The smell of chicken cooking mixing into the wind to be carried into someone's window. The smell of lemon and garlic wafting around their house now. Isabella and our new baby brother Paxton sitting carefully entranced by whatever show is on. Isabella is probably mad at me still for kicking out though but he still waits for dinner.
I hear our front door open and close now. The loud bang echoing through the house. Another visitor yay! I slip from my bed and shift to the window, my gaze peeking through my curtains to the house across the street. There he was again. He was leaning over to work under the hood of his car. Sweat glistening off of his back muscles and under his white tank top. His jeans hanging slightly off of his hip.He stands up and qucikly wipes sweat off his forehead. He had black stuff smudged across hands, shirt,and forearms making him look even more masculine. His blue eyes bright I could see them all the way from my window. He goes back under his hood working again.
I jump and bang my head against my glass window at the sound of Dahlia's voice.I didn't even hear her come in.
"Don't do that,you scared the shit out of me." I rub my forehead and go back to sit on my bed. Dahlia came and stood in front of me with her hands crossed over her giant chest that was popping out of a low cut tight black dress. Her hair was curled to a blonde perfection and her lips were glossed to the acceptable max. Her blue eyes looked down at me with disapproval.
"What?" I asked
"Don't what me Bridget, You obviously have something for 'Mr. toolbox' over there." she said leaning against my dresser assessing her nails. She must have someli ke freakish sixth sense.
"No I don't." I say. Considering the fact I don't know his name and that I have never talked to him means I don't right? "Yeah okay. What have you been doing with your life Bridget?" she asks me.
"Why?" I question
"Your mom told me to talk to you, she called." I shift uncomfortable. sometimes it sucks your mom is aware who your best friend.
"sometimes I wish I was more like you." I say, she frowns and sits next to me. "why you you say that?"
"You have no problem getting boys, you look like your going on a date right now." she blushes "I have never even been kissed Dahlia, I want to make love." I admit.
She glares at me "Really what are you getting at?" she asks. I hesitate but I pull out my journal and flip to the last page passing it to her. I watch her read over it and smile.
"So can you help me?" I ask.. She walks into my closet and pulls out a dress I forgot all about. "Remember when I got you this?"
I looked at the scrap of cloth dress. It was a long sleeved, bareback dress.It glimmered in the light and it was a pretty blush pink color. "Not really.."
She shrugged "Put it on." she ordered giving me the 'don't question me' look. I slip out my pajamas and glide on the dress. I looked at her for her next instructions. She sat me down and put makeup on me and glossed my lips. Then she tossed me a pair of nude heels and slid a gold charm bracelet on my arm. "done." she smiled satisfied.
I got up from the bed and walked in front of my mirror. My once tired face had been fixed up with blush and a warm colored eye shadow. My lips were almost as pink and full as her's.I took my fingers and ran them through my brown chopped hair. I remember how long hair felt to this day.
"So are you gonna tell me what were doing?"
she smirks "I can promise you that you won't be making love anytime soon but I can get you sex." she explains.Something inside me shifts like the words were just thrown at me.
"Okay then. What are we waiting for?" I plaster a smile on my face. I can't give in.
I follow her down stairs and towards the door. "Bridget?" my mother calls running towards me. "what are you doing out your room?" she grabs my arm
"I'm doing what you wanted me to do and getting out." I tell her.
she goes quiet and looks at me. "Be back by midnight then." she murmurs.
"Don't worry Ms. Kennedy I'll have her back." Dahlia promises.
I breathe in the smoke from the club were at breaking into a cough fit. Dahlia rubs my back then pulls me towards the bouncer. The man looks us up and down assessing us in our short dresses and heels letting us pass. No waiting in line and no paying because I was sexualizing myself. Do I dare say I felt like a violated slut?
Dahlia pulls me into the crowd of gyrating bodies and makes me dance with her. We shake our hips and I force myself to relax. It is okay, I am okay. I look at Dahlia who is scanning the crowd for her prey.
"look Bridget." she points towards two guys. One had semi long curly hair and the other's was a nice dark shade.
"I have to go to the rest room." I lie and push through the crowd of people until I found myself hovering over a sink ready to regergitate my stomach lining. Do I really want to do this? Do I really want to loose the thing I managed to keep pure for so long. I thought for a moment. Yes, I was ready to feel the weight of a boy on top of me. I couldn't bitch out now.
"You okay?" Dahlia materializes next to me. I nod with the nausea gone. "Okay because their names are Harry and Zayn." I nod repeatedly as she goes on. "We are gonna go back to their place okay?" my eyes go wide but I continue to nod. "okay." I say.
we follow them to their cars and Dahlia whispers to me "Harry is all you babe."
The car ride was fairly silent besides the radio and the constant beating of my heart against my rib cage. We pull infront of a small house with a white picket fence. I smile inside. How cute. We follow them inside were Zayn dims the lights and Harry puts on mood music.
Zayn and Dahlia start dancing in the middle of the room hugged up but obviously not dancing. I lean against the far wall sipping the tea Harry suprised me with. "So your Bridget huh?" he asks his emerald eyes looking bright against the darkened room. I nod and put down the cup. I've never done a one night stand but it doesn't take a genius.
"Kiss me Harry." I say. He looks suprised but leans in towards me brushing his lips against mine.It starts off soft but then our kisses deepen.
"Let's go to the room."
I follow him down a hall and Into a room with a desk and a bed with clothes in places.He was normal. He rushes tossing stuff places and comes back to me continuing our kiss.
"Wait, light a candle." I say. He smiles and does as I say. I sit on his bed and we continue. He unzips my dress and I kick off my heels. I'm really doing it.
he pulls away "Hmmm?"
"I never done this before." I say, his eyes widen
"I promise it doesn't hurt." he says and strips himself of his top. He kisses me again and slides off my dress and unhooks my bra. I never had been naked infront of anyone before. He sheds off his jeans and gets on top of me. Bottoms left for both us. I focus on something happy. We slips of our bottoms and he looks at me.
"You ready?" he asks
"protection?" I answer with a question. He nods. I nod in return.
I wake up with him curled around me. I peer at the clock and its 3 in the morning. I get out and collect my things. I walk in the living room seeing Dahlia passed out on the couch wearing zayn's button up shirt. I go over and nudge her. "Bridget?" she asks.
"yeah I'm going home."
"was it that bad?" she whispers. I try to hide my tears and smile.
"where are the keys?" I ask. she motions towards her purse. I go and grab the keys to my house that a I put in her purse.
"Wait Bridget don't walk. just stay." she says half asleep. I ignore her and walk outside my bare feet beating against the sidewalk as I try so hard to get away from the house and what I just did.
a/n: I tried to blow your mind.
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