I head to the tour bus after the guys finish performing. Wanting to avoid having to wait alone with Annabell. I wrap myself in a blanket and sit on the tour bus couch watching as a man who looked like he had been up for days but has drank to much coffee to even think of sleep tell me how the weather is going to be. Just as I start to forget about my cousin she comes walking onto the tour bus shutting the door behind her. I go to head for my bunk but she stops me.
"Leia please wait"
"I have nothing to say to you"
"I brought you a present. Please just listen to what I have to say for a few minutes and if you still don't want to talk to me then I won't bother you again for the rest of the time I'm here all summer" She says moving the hand she has been holding behind her into view so I can see her holding a bag of sour patches in her hand.
Bring my favorite candy. Well played.
I reach my hand out and she throws them to me before sitting at the other end of the couch. She seems to be really trying to get me to hear her out so I decide to let her tell me what's on her mind just this once.
"What do you want" I say my voice showing no emotion. She doesn't deserve any.
And in that moment she starts to cry.
"I..........I want to say I'm sorry. I was mean to you earlier I.....I always am to you. I was even meaner to you a couple years ago. I really liked Luke and I knew you did too. I was jealous because you were always better at talking to people than me. You were always so kind and I hated you for it. I have never been able to let people in. To let them get close to me. Not even you or Michael. I was just so angry I couldn't be more like you that I ended up taking it out on you. That day when you came over with Michael, Calum, and Luke I was way over the line. Believe it or not I actually cried myself to sleep that night. Because even though I was jealous of you I have always loved you so much. And Michael he took my side. That must have hurt you so bad. He was wrong to do that. Please believe me when I say I have dreaded that day for last two years. That day and every other day I have ever said anything to hurt you. I remember as couple years back, the first day you stopped answering my calls. I thought you would get over it and call me back but you didn't you never talked to me again. I was so upset and I was angry at myself for hurting you but I couldn't stop feeling like I wasn't as good as other people. This girl at my school had reminded me so much of you that I started taking my anger out on her too. It went on for a few months. I was worse on her than I had even been on you. And after awhile she just couldn't take it anymore. She tried to commit suicide and almost succeeded. That was the moment it really sit in what I had been doing. To you and her both. I started to go to therapy and it really helped. I became friends with her and she eventually forgave me. She is one of my best friends now. The only thing left for me to do was to apologize to you but you wouldn't answer my calls. After a while I gave up and figured that you would call me when you were ready. When almost another year had passed I decided that I wasn't going to worry about it anymore. When it came on the news last summer that you had been kidnapped I felt like my heart had stopped. I didn't know if you were alive or dead they weren't giving out information at first. It was like all the times I had hurt you came back and hit me again. I was so scared I had lost you and that you had died thinking that I hated you. I was scared that the day at the pool was how you would remember me and that those hurtful things I said to you would be the last thing I ever got to say to you. I was so happy when they had finally stated that you were okay. Then mom and dad called your parents and found out what happened to you. I couldn't believe what that guy did to you. What he would have done if the guys hadn't gotten there in time. I wanted to be there for you. You needed me but you wouldn't turn to me after how I treated you. That's why I decided to join you guys this summer. To make sure that nothing happens to you and that you don't ever feel like you can't come to me again. Earlier when I saw you I was still a bit angry at you for not talking to me for two years so I lashed out again not thinking about it but when you put me in my place you reminded me why I am here. I promise that earlier will be the last time I hurt your feelings ever again. I love you Leia we are family and I want to be here for you. If you are willing to give me a chance I would like to spend this summer getting you to forgive me" Annabell says tears falling from her eyes.
I don't say anything for a long time. Trying to let her words sink in. Hearing everything she has been through in the last couple years does make it easier to understand why she has always been so mean to me. Still it is no excuse for how she treated me. I can tell that she actually is sorry for what she has done and it makes it a little easier to think of her as my cousin again. I think that with time we might be able to be close again.
"I can't say that I forgive you but I see now where you come from. I didn't realize you were suffering too and I'm sorry that you thought you had to take things out on me that way. And that the girl from your school had to suffer the way she did, but don't think it is an excuse, You were still wrong for what you did. Your right about one thing though. It would have been nice if I could have had you to turn to after what had happened. It was a really hard time for me. I will give you a chance to earn my forgiveness by the end of if you promise me that you are done putting people down, don't use Luke, are nice to Calum, and keep your hands off Ashton" I say to her as I hold out my hand.
If she even thinks of touching Ashton we are done as family.
"I promise" She says shaking my hand after she wipes away her tears.
We both smile to each other hoping we can be friends again. I turn on a movie and Annabell watches it with me while we wait for the boys to show up.