After spending the rest of the week in the hospital I was finally allowed to be released. I was put on some medication that would help with my stomach and another one for the pain. Luke had tried to see me again but I made a strict rule to keep him out, I didn't want to talk to him anymore. I did allow Liz to come see me and as we talked for a bit and she left roses for me with a note attached with lyrics to one of my favorite all time low song that read "Even though she doesn't believe in love he's determine to call her bluff, who could deny these butterflies filling his gut. -Luke" I wish he didn't know so much about me.
Now it was time for my two weeks before I left home. I wish my last two weeks were as good and peaceful as Luke's were but instead it was crazy. My parents wanted me to see a psychiatrist to help see if they could help me remember anything about that night. As much as I didn't want to go I didn't fight, I had already put them through so much and I kind of wanted to know myself what happened. It was defiantly a really hard experience sitting there telling someone everything. I ended up breaking down a few times. I knew what was going on was wrong but I was so upset and so broken inside that I didn't think anything could possibly get worse, I felt as if I deserved it. Lucky for me now I knew my mistake and was able to know good for bad and knew that I never go back to anyone like Tyler. I realized I was so lost and confused having Luke not telling me why he left that he just did it, now I had an answer and I felt much better with somewhat of an answer now. I wasn't able to recall much of what happened that night. I just remembered that I went home to grab some of the things I left when I moved out and my parents tried to talk to me and tried to get me to talk to Alex and I went nuts and screamed at them when they told me I should leave Tyler and I remember going back to Tyler's and telling him and then him being upset with me and from their I don't remember.
On top of going to therapy I had to go to court to testify against Tyler. That's the first time I had seen him since that night. He looked awful compared to his usual clean cut attractive self that I use to know. I remember when I first meet him, I loved his dark brown eyes, the little bit of scruff he had and his longer dark brown hair. Seeing him in court like this made me see his true self, the scary abuser who continued to haunt my dreams at night. I kept having nightmares of him killing me in a new way every night and even some where Luke would be helping him slowly killing me. Tyler was found guilty and put behind bars. I was so happy to see him taken away in handcuffs and being locked up away from me. After all the court craziness I had to finish packing and look for a ball gown. After spending a week at Harvard I would be leaving to fly to my home town in Michigan to attend my grandparents ball. This year I was going solo as my parents and I both agreed I should probably stay away from boys for a while.
The two weeks seemed to fly by as I blinked and I found myself hugging Caitlin and all my friends goodbye. We all promised we would keep in touch and that I would visit them as much as possible. It was probably harder to say goodbye to Caitlin then anyone else. I was going to miss her so much. I felt like at the end of this year we had gotten so close and although I found out she went to Luke to get him to talk to me I wasn't upset with her because she tried to save me. Secretly I was thankful to Luke as well. I didn't want to be with him or see him anymore but if it wasn't for him coming into the house that night I would have been left to die. After saying goodbye and see you soon to my parents and little brothers I boarded the plane to Harvard.
I was now alone. Everyone had their families there helping them unpack all their stuff and I didn't. People already had friends and I didn't. I was alone. I was walking around campus when I suddenly saw a familiar face holding tight a pretty blonde in his arms. It was Jake. "Hey there stranger." He said waving me over. "Hey Vanessa this is Clarissa, Clarissa this is Vanessa." She was beautiful just like Jake said. "It's so nice to finally meet you, Jake said some amazing things about you!" I said shaking her hand. She blushed and looked at him. They were cute. "Eh what happened to your eye. Get in a fight?" Jake said. "Yeah something kinda like that." I said keeping my voice down low. After taking for a while and finding out that I was in the middle of Jake and Calrissas farewell for now I decided to head out. "It was so nice to meet you Vanessa. At least I now know someone here I can trust to keep an I on jake." She said making us both laugh. "It's nice to meet you too. See you later." I said getting ready, "Hey were hanging out tonight right Vanessa?" Jake said. I nodded and smiled and walked away.
Later that night Jake and I were hanging out in his dorm. His roommate wasn't so happy about how late we were up till but we had a lot to catch up on. He went on and on about Clarissa and how much he was going to miss her and how amazing his summer was and went on and on like he was preacher talking about God. It really was cute how in love they were. "Well enough about me how is Luke?" He said nudging me. I looked down, "we uh broke up." I said fiddling with my thumbs. "What really?! I'm so sorry, I didn't know." I just laughed it off. "It's ok." "That's shocking to me. The way you talked about Luke made me think it was a serious thing. What happened?" "Well he went away on tour and we um broke up." It was silent for a while. "So what really happened to your eye?" He said. I didn't know what to say but I felt like I needed to let Jake know. I had only known him for such a short time but I trusted him so I told him everything. I told him about how Luke and my break up to meeting Tyler to the abuse to that night to waking up in the hospital to Luke and my fight and how I haven't seen him since. "Wow. Poor guy." Was all Jake could say. "What do you mean?" I said with a bit of fury in my voice. "Well I mean he just wanted the best for you and that didn't happen now he wants you back and you won't give him a second chance." "He fucking left me without a reason." "He didn't have a reason worth giving." I couldn't believe Jake was sticking up for Luke. "Vanessa I'm not saying the guy was right. That was a dick move but I know that he loves you and I can tell you still love him too." I looked down. In a way he was right I did still like Luke but their was no way I was going to forgive him for what he had done. "I saw this in the store and bought it." He said showing me the 5 seconds of summer album. "Have you heard it yet?" He said handing it to me. I shook my head. After Luke and I broke up I refused to see his face. I would fall into a complete mess when I heard she looks so perfect on the radio. "It's actually really good you should give it a listen. I can see the stories you told me in every song and you can actually feel in the songs he wrote how he felt about you, and still feels about you."
I went back to my dorm room and put the cd into my cd played plugged in my headphones and laid in my bed and hit play. I hate to say it but Jake was right, it was really good. No, it was perfect. Every song told a story behind us. End up here about the time we first met. Good girls quoting something I said exactly and giving it a story. Every song from kiss me kiss me to long way home to don't stop and she looks so perfect told a story of what us. I even remember hearing things he told me like "well never be as young as we are now." In songs like never be. Every song made me cry but the worst hit me during close as strangers and amnesia. I knew he didn't write amnesia but I saw us together and everything we had being taken away. I hated how much I loved this album and I hated how perfect the songs were and I really hated how much I still loved him.