The Golden Gun

A random short story about Archer Fade, the spy. When Archer's Golden Gun goes missing, she tries to find out who it is with disastrous results...

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1. Waking Up in a Pumpkin Patch For The Fifth Time

  It all started when our predictably heroic protagonist, Archer Fade, woke up in a  pumpkin patch. It was the fifth time it had happened. Feeling abundantly relieved, Archer Fade shot some pumpkins to pieces, thinking it would make her feel better (but as usual, it did not). A few unsatisfying minutes later, she realized that her beloved Golden Gun was missing!  Immediately she called her so-called buddy, Steven Parker. Archer Fade had known Steven for 3 years, the majority of which were eccentric ones. Parker was unique. He was clever though sometimes a little... annoying. Archer Fade called him anyway, for the situation was urgent.

  Steven picked up to a very worried Archer Fade. He calmly assured her that only hypocrites worry. He had no idea what that meant; he was only concerned with distracting Archer.  Why was Parker trying to distract Fade?  Because he had snuck out from Archer Fade's pumpkin patch with the Golden Gun only two hours prior.  It was a sassy little gun... how could he resist?

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