Here I go again. I can't stop thinking about Alana. But this time it's about how she's been acting so strange. I lay on the floor of my bedroom with my phone on my chest. I decide to call her. She doesn't pick up. I guess I'll just have to talk to her at school tomorrow.
I walk in the halls of the school hoping I'll come across Alana. She's probably avoiding me. I finally see her leaning against the lockers with Luke. I study their facial expressions. Luke appears to have some sort of evil smile on his face while Alana looks a bit worried. Alana walks away from Luke. I run over to Alana stopping her in her tracks.
"Alana are you ok?" Alana doesn't say anything she just clenches her lips and nods her head. I don't believe her for a second. I grab her by the arm making her flinch but I don't let go. "Alana please tell me the truth."
I can't do this. I can't lie to Ashton. "Alana please tell me the truth." He says concerned. The guilt rises up. I can feel it running through my veins "Actually Ashton, I don't know what's wrong." Ashton lets go of my arm "Well ok. When you figure it out tell me. K?"
"Ok." I walk off. I can't believe what I did yesterday. I can't tell anybody. Not even Mali. She'll think I'm a monster. As I'm walking Luke catches up to me. "Hey babe."
"Luke I thought I told you not to call me that."
"You did but I didn't listen." He laughs "Luke you're evil." I narrow my eyes at him "Maybe, but let's keep in mind that YOU came onto me."
"It's still your fault. Maybe if you stopped flirting with me then I wouldn't have to worry about coming onto you."
"Look Alana, it's simple. I wanna bang you, you wanna bang me." I raise my eyebrows "Do you think I feel GOOD about this whole thing? Cuz I don't!" Luke laughs and just hugs me. He knows that I can't resist it. I hug him back tighter than he was hugging me.
Alana and I had arranged for me to come to her place after school. I knock on the door. Alana lets me in and we sit down. "So what's the status?" I ask. Alana looks away. She seems guilty of something "Alana... What did you do."
"I can't tell you."
"You can tell me anything!"
"You won't get mad?" I shake my head "Mali I've done something terrible. I cheated... on Ashton." She burst into tears. "Alana! It's okay. Tell me what happened." She wipes away her tears. I try not to show that I'm actually completely shocked "Well... It started when Luke pulled me into the janitors closet and apologised for kissing me. I told him that I'm actually dating Ashton but I don't know if I like him or not. Then he started flirting with me and shit and kinda like tryna like kiss me and stuff so I'm like nuh get off of me. But then after school he was like hey come over and I just couldn't resist. When I was at his house he didn't come on to me at all, he just stared at me with those beautiful blue eyes. Next thing I know he's fucking me on the couch. And I came onto him. I feel terrible."
"I know that feel bro." I say as I hug her "I once too had a bad case of the 'I want to have sex with Luke' s."
"Yep. I had it bad. But I ignored it and now I don't want him anymore. I just want you to know, this isn't your fault."
I don't think I can get over Luke like Mali did. Ashton is the right choice. I know that for a fact. But then why do I want to pick Luke? I'm torn.
"Alana I'm so sorry you've got to believe me. I promise no more of all that flirting. I won't influence your decision." Luke is on his knees "Luke I don't know. You really messed up."
"I know and I regret it."
"Fine you're forgiven. But don't expect that I'm going to pick you."
"I know what I did was horrible. I should've known better than to persuade you."
"Who's persuading who?" Ashton walks in and my heart stops.
"Uh- Ashton!" Luke says "Ashton how much did you hear?" I ask "Enough to know that you and Luke did something together. Spill now." Ashton is on to us. Luke threw me a look "Look Ashton it was one time and it-" Ashton cut me off "What? What was one time?!" I couldn't blame it on Luke. He was standing right there and he just apologised to me. I gave Ashton a sad look. Immediately he knew I had cheated on him "Alana tell me now. What did you do with Luke." Ashton was gritting his teeth "SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT THE FUCK YOU TWO DID BEHIND MY BACK NOW" Luke and I stood frozen "Ashton it was my fault. I so sorry man." Ashton's face lit up with anger "What did you two do; kiss?!"
"Well um... It gets worse." I can't believe Luke said that "What do you mean it gets worse?!" Ashton screams. Ashton walks up to me. I don't dare to move. "Alana what the fuck did you do?!"
"Ashton! It's not Alana's fault!"
"Okay I'm serious! Someone tell me exactly what happened now or somebody's gonna get punched in the face!!!" Scared that Luke was get a fist to the nose I told Ashton everything "Luke and I made out and had sex! We regret every second of it! I'm sorry!!" Tears escape my eyes. Ashton grabs Luke by the collar and pushes him against the wall "Ashton! No! Don't hurt Luke!"
"Why? Because you love him?!"
"No Ashton! I love you!" As soon as I say that Ashton drops Luke leaving him to fall to the floor. The anger leaves Ashton's face "You do?"
"Yes, I do." Ashton shuts his eyes and shakes his head "No Alana don't use that on me. What you did was wrong and I can never forgive you for that. Why don't you just go and sex with Luke again?! You're a whore Alana! A disgusting whore!" He walks out of the room. Each word he said leaving a bullet hole in my heart. Tears roll my cheeks. I watch as Ashton walks away. He doesn't look back once. Luke gets up. "This is my fault; isn't it?"
"Yes Luke, yes it is."