I was so afraid from Calum... I never liked when he or other boys get angry. When he let go of my troath I fell to the ground and tried to get more air. Calum wanted to touch me and he said sorry but when I had back some more oxygen I ran away crying. Good that we weren't drive so I could ran out of the bus. I heard them shouting at each other. I was afraid, every boyfriend I had was abusive and hit me or hurt me. I sat at the wall of the bus crying into my knees. I need to be alone a little time. Why did I even came with them on this tour..? My troath hurts and I'm coughing. Somebody walked outside but I didn't look up.
"Are you okay?" It was Luke. No... Not a boy... Omg... I can't run away... What do I need to do? No no no he is coming closer and he hold my shoulder. No...
"P-please d-don't hurt m-me" I cried. Afraid.
"I won't, Alicia... Don't be afraid of me, I would never hurt you and you know that" he said as he sit diwn in front of me. He wanted to hold my hands but I pulled my hands out of us.
"Are you okay?" He asked worried and I nodded
"Look up, look at me" he said but I didn't
"Are you afraid of me?" He asked but I didn't answer and just cried in my knees. He tried hugging me and now I needed to look up. I pulled away.
"Alicia you troath" he said with his mouth open. He looked in my eyes and I saw his eyes tearing up
"Don't hurt me"
"I won't! Alicia please let me hug you" he begged and I gave in. We stood up and he hugged me. My legs where shaking.
"Don't be afraid okay? This was one big mistake, Calum broke down because of this, please don't be afraid of us" Luke begged as he let go of the hug now
"Come inside please" he said and took my hand in his
"Don't h-hurt me p-pleas-e o-o-okay...?"
"We won't!" He said and he walked inside with me behind him. He still had my hand in his.
The boys all looked at me. The first one I saw was Calum... He looked up and cried harder when he saw me taking my hand back and walked behind again.
"Alicia, what happened to your troath?"
"Are you okay?"
"Did Calum do this?"
"CALUM YOU'RE GOING TO DIE!!"
They asked and shouted and that made me even more afraid. I ran out of the bus again with Laura behind me this time.
"Ali, it's okay, they won't hurt you!" She said hugging me. I saw Louis, Harry, Ashton, Michael, Niall and Luke coming out of the bus also. I wasn't that afraid of Louis but he hit me once too.
"Did Calum do this to you?"
"Why are you afraid?"
"Don't be afraid"
"Why are your legs and hands shaking?
"Is that because of Calum that you are afraid?"
"Ali, we won't ever hurt you, come inside"
"WE ARE GOING TO LEAVE" the bus driver said so we all needed to go inside again.
"Guys can you go please I want to talk with Ali" Luke said walking up to me. And they walked inside again.
"Ali--" he said but I hugged him. His hands around my waist. He hugged my tight.
"Guys we're leaving" the driver said. I trust Luke 'cause he never hurted me. I stopped crying and we went inside. Everybody started asking questions again. I didn't want to answer them and just sat down. Louis sat next to me and I laid my head in his shoulder. His arm around me and I fell asleep.
"Ali, Ali. Alicia wake up Ali" Louis said as he shaked me a bit.
"We need to go on the boat Ali" he said and I woke up. I stood up and took my purse we all got of the bus.
"Ali? Can we talk?" Calum asked but I got afraid again by thinking of what he did and what happened. I walked faster now and he still behind me, talking
Alicia, please... I'm so sorry I didn't ment to do that I'm really sorry, please forgive me Alicia please" he begged as he grabbed my arm. I tought about what happened before.
"D-don't hurt m-me" I begged as I held my other hand infront of my face
"I won't Alicia, please... Don't be afraid... I wanna talk with you I don't wanna hurt you" my eyes where watering now. Liam came up to me and held my waist.
"Listen, Ali look at me" he said and I looked at him
"Calum is not going to hurt you, just talk with him, okay?" He said and I nodded. He left me and Calum alone.
"I'm sorry about your troath. I really didn't ment to do that. Please forgive me... I hust was really angry but you know that I would never hurt you... Alicia please..." He said begging and crying. My hands where shaking again. I don't know what I can say...
"Sorry" I said and walked to the others.
We where on the boat now. Tonight they have their first concert, I'm happy for them. A tear rolled down my cheek as I sat down on a bench looking to the water, the sea. It's so big. I couldn't forget about what happened. I walked inside to the bathroom with my purse. I locked the door and took my blade out of my purse. I slit my wrist one time really deep. I wrapped a bandage around the wound and washed my face. I searched my injection and inject my arm. I throwed the needle and the paper where it was in in the dirtybag. I pulled my sleeves back down and unlocked the door and got out. I walked to Laura and the guys.
"We're almost on out location" Niall said smiling at me and I nodded smiling back
"We only need to sit in the bus for 30 minuts and then we are at the place we need to be in London" Harry said