Attempts At Descriptive Writing...

This is going to be a collection of short descriptive pieces based on books that I've read. I'll attempt to mimic the author's writing style in my clumsy fashion and hopefully learn something in the process. I'm teaching myself to write here; any constructive criticism would be wonderful. I'll probably write little critical notes on each piece because I reckon it helps me.


1. 'Two Boys', based on "Mysterious Skin" by Scott Heim.

Two boys are lying on a sofa, each clinging to the other's hand like it's the only thing keeping him from the abyss below. The first boy is a storm - his eyes are thunderbolts, his breath a is ragged gale and his tears are a torrent. He is unaware of the rain that is falling onto his lover's bare chest. The second boy is slumped across the first and has closed his eyes; he looks almost angelic in his sleep. But not quite. He is calmer, quieter, stiller than the other boy; but every so often a look of exquisite pain shoots through him and his image of perfection dissolves into his lover's rain of tears.

Outside it is snowing. Tiny flecks of white fall from above in an enticingly frantic fashion, slicing through the sky at uncontrollable speeds. The wind screams and trees shake. A single solitary man walks by the window of the boys' room; he doesn't notice them and they don't notice him. 

Neither of the boys stir, yet neither relax.  They're at the end of their world, and they can feel some unknown hand forcing them to the beginning of ours. However hard they try to resist, they cannot win; they're moving closer to us - step by wicked step, inch by wicked inch- closer they come.

But they don't want to go.

And so they hold each other - the storm and the fallen angel - and they wish they could both just disappear.



I tried. I really tried. It's just that I'm new to all this creative writing shit and imitating Scott Heim's style is not easy; he has this way of controlling metaphors and language that I can only dream of understanding. His use of pathetic fallacy is beautiful too; I tried to recreate it but I can't seem to get it quite right. Hopefully I'll get better in the future though.

In some sick twisted way, I think that this piece is about growing up.

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