You were finally home from another late day at work.You were an actress and had just landed your first big movie role, so you were being held on set everyday from as early as 6am to sometimes even as late as 2am.You had to stay dedicated to the movie no matter how stressed or tired you were and you had to stay on the director's good side if you ever wanted to land another job again.You were very happy about your job and more grateful than anything that you could be the main character in one that was predicted to be the biggest movie of the year.
Although all of this probably sounded amazing and most of it really was as great as it sounded all of the stress and late nights was really starting to put a strain on your relationship with your boyfriend, Zayn.You hardly ever got to see each other as often because you always left before he woke up and he was usually asleep by the time you made it home.Even on those few occasions where you did have the chance to see each other, you would be distant.The air between you was tense and it felt as though you were drifting apart.You wanted to fix what you had, but you could never talk to him without a small fight happening.It was usually your fault and you always felt guilty afterward.You could never think straight and was very temperamental from the lack of sleep and that was usually what caused them to happen.
When you got home that night, it was almost 1am. you expected to find Zayn in your bed sleeping.Instead, when you walked in and kicked your shoes off, throwing your purse to the side, Zayn was sitting on the couch, like he was waiting for you.Your walked over to the couch and sat next to him, confused.He turned to look at you with a complex expression that you couldn't quite make out, on his face.
"Babe, are you alright is something up Zayn?" you asked concerned, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder. He tensed slightly at your touch, but didn't pull away. He avoided eye contact with you for a while and it made me feel rather nervous.You thought, maybe he was going to break up with you.Your stomach dropped just thinking about it. After a few moments in complete, deafening silence, he brought his eyes up to look into yours.
"Jessica, we've really been growing apart these last few months and it's breaking me. We've barely said a word to each other in weeks. What's going on because we can't continue like this and you know it."Your heart sank at his words.You knew you would hear them eventually, you just didn't think he would have said them so bluntly.
You looked down and bit your lip.This is exactly what someone would say right before they broke up. There was no doubt in your mind that Zayn was going to break up with you that night. He seemed to be reading your mind because he quickly put in, "I don't want us to be over. I just want us to be like we used to. Before you started that movie." you narrowed your eyes at him, suddenly becoming a bit irritated.
"Are you saying that this is all my fault?" You asked, in a high and offended voice.You were trying to keep your temper in check by remembering that what you were feeling wasn't real and it was all just your over tiredness.You took a deep breath while waiting for a reply to keep your self calm.
"I'm not saying that it's all your fault, love. You know that's not what I mean. It's both of our faults. I just think that we're spending too much time apart and you and your movie is a big part of it." He said, trying to be reasonable. This only made your temper worse. He practically said that it wasn't all your fault, but it was mostly yours. You stood up, furiously.
"This is so fucking typical of you! Whenever there's a problem between us, it's always my fault. Every single time. Even when you're the one on tour, its my fault that we grow distant. You say I don't call you enough, so I call you more only to have you say that I'm clingy. It doesn't matter that when I call you, your with the guys or have a 'duty as a musician to uphold' because whenever something bad happens, its no one else's fault but mine. Isn't that right?" you said looking into his eyes angrily.
He opened his mouth to respond to your outburst, but you cut him off. "And now your blaming me and my happiness. I can't just drop everything to be with you, Zayn! I've worked so hard for this and now that I finally have it, you're trying to make me feel bad about it? Can't you just stop being a terrible boyfriend for five minutes and let me do what I want for once?" you said all of this very harshly and it wasn't until you heard nothing come from his mouth, that you realized just what you had said.
His silence was deafening and an enormous wave of guilt washed over you.You had done it again.You caused another fight between you guys only, this one seemed to have a bigger impact on him.You stepped forward and tried to embrace him in a hug only to have him very lightly push me away and step back.
"N-no Zayn, I-" you started trying to apologize only to be interrupted by him.
"I think you should just go to bed. It's really late." He said with no emotion in his voice and an unreadable expression on his face.You could do nothing but simply nod.
"A-are you coming?"You asked, pulling lightly on his arm, already knowing and fearing the answer. He shook his head.
"No. I think Ill stay up a little longer..." He said quietly and refused to make eye contact with you while pulling his arm free from your grip.You knew exactly what that meant.It meant he wasn't going to bed at all that night.He probably slept on the couch like he did many other times you had fought.
You sighed and nodded, biting your lip.You sent him one last pain filled look before walking to the room you shared.As you got ready for bed and laid down, you did all you could to keep the tears from coming. It miserably failed because you ended up crying your self to sleep.
Your alarm woke you up the next morning at 5 o'clock. Walking to the bathroom, you looked in the mirror and saw that you looked absolutely terrible.You sighed and got in to the shower. It was a quick one because you really did not have time for a long one, as much as you wanted to.You got out and instantly looked better. Not as much could be said about how you felt.You simply changed into comfortable clothes without any makeup, because the makeup artists on set would do that for you.
You still couldn't get over what happened the night before.You hated all the fighting and it was worse because you knew it was always your fault.You could hardly believe that you said he was a bad boyfriend.You knew that Zayn would finally come to his senses and leave you.You hated to think about it, but he would soon become fed up with your attitude lately and break up with you.You started tearing up just thinking about it but took a deep breath and held them back.
You looked at the time a realized that it was already 6 so you sighed, grabbed your purse and started walking out.You stopped when you noticed Zayn sleeping.You sort of just stared at him for a while.It wasn't until you felt something wet on your hand, that you realized you had been crying.Soon, you was on your knees, sobbing. You were unsure why.Everything that was going on was finally catching up with you. Your lack of sleep, your exhaustion the fights between Zayn and you. Everything.
Your sobs must have woken Zayn up because just then, you felt two arms wrap around you.You found your self sobbing into his chest while he comforted and held you close to him.You muttered out several small apologies, because that was all you could get out of your mouth without sending you into another fit of tears.
"No no no. You didn't do anything wrong, Jess. Please, don't cry, sweetheart."He mumbled into your hair.After a while, your crying ceased.You looked up at him and he wiped your tears away.
"I-I'm so sorry for everything I've done the past few months. I've just been a really big bitch. I never meant anything I said. You're the best boyfriend anyone could ever possibly have. I really don't like fighting with you, I've just been so stressed and temperamental and tired and just straight up exhausted since I started the movie." you rambled on, speaking quickly.
"I didn't know this movie was stressing you out so much. Baby, why didn't you tell me? I could have helped. I hate seeing you like this." He said stroking your hair comfortingly.
"I don't know... I didn't want you to think I was selfish or anything. I thought you were going to break up with me. I really didn't know what to do." you said looking down, rather ashamed of your foolish thoughts and actions.Zayn lifted your chin with two fingers so that you were looking him in the eye.
"You can tell me anything. You know that. I love you and always will. Never be afraid to talk to me." He said with a very serious expression before pecking you on the lips.You smiled at him before closing your eyes, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms for the first time in months. A few moments later, though, your eyes snapped opened as you realized the time.You looked at your phone and saw that it was already 7.You were half an hour late and needed to get to set fast.
You stood up quickly and Zayn looked at you confused.You gave him an apologetic look before saying, "I'm so sorry, Zayn, but I really need to go or the director will kill me..." Before you even finished, Zayn had already taken your phone out of your purse and had it up to his ear.You looked at him with a raised eyebrow as he began talking.
"Yes, hi. I'm calling about Jessica Wilburn. She wont be able to make it to set today and probably not for the next few days..." He paused for moment, to hear the person on the other end of the line talk. "Well, you see, she's come down with a really bad case of the flu and it's really bad this year, as I'm sure you may know." He paused again and smiled brightly. "Okay, great. She should be back next Tuesday." And with that he hung up and handed the phone back to you grinning.
"Well, it looks like your free for a bit." He said, smiling down at you.You opened your mouth to complain, but all you could do was smile and embrace him in a giant hug.You were so thankful to have a boyfriend as amazing as him.
You pulled back and he looked at you."So, what do you want to do first?" he asked.You thought for a moment then, yawned, feeling your eyelids starting to become heavy and your body turning to jello.
"Sleep." You said simply and dragged him into your room.He laughed as you both climbed into bed and he instantly wrapped his arms around you.You snuggled closer to him, loving the familiar feeling of being so safe and warm in his arms that you hadn't felt in so long.You felt at peace finally and drifted off into a pleasant sleep.