i banged her door. "leave me alone Harry." she said. "no,tell me what it is, what did i do?" i yelled. "it's not you Harry." she said. "then what it is." i asked. silent. she didn't open. "open the door please." i said my voice cracking. there was something what she wasn't telling me. the way how she looked me when i told her she was perfect. she opened the door. her eyes were red from the crying. i didn't get it, why did she cry? i got in and closed the door behind me.she sat on the sofa. i sat next to her and took her hands on mine looking her. "what it is?" i asked. she shook her head. and cried. "shhh." i said hugging her. "Harry i really like you, i don't want to hurt you."she whispered. "you are not hurting me. you make me happy." i said. "Harry, i hurt people who i care about." she told. "Harry i'm not okay." she said. "i will help you." i said. she shook her head again. "no, no one cant help me." she said."whats wrong." i asked. "i have this disease what is very rare." she breathed. i nod. "i get strong mood wings it's like i'm on my period all the time some times, i can be really difficult and mean like hole different person, then it goes away leaving me feeling horrible and bad and i get depressed 'cause i cant control my feelings.my hands." she said tears streaming down her face. "my hands are cold all the time." she said."sometimes i get the feeling that my toes are burning but at the reality they are freezing,when i eat i feel like there is lump in my throat my but there's nothing my brains just made that all up. i'm not strong.if i don't take my pills i'm powerless and weak. it's my brains. they are damaged and it just get worse when i get the depression side. you haven't been there when i'm depressed, i promise its help less. i understand if you don't want to have anything to do with me." she said looking down. "oh Fay." i said lifting her head up and kissing her lips. i really didn't care about her problems, i really liked her, she gave me the feeling what i hadn't felt earlier for anyone.i loved her. and there was nothing that could stop me and make me stay away from her, she was my drug."i can take it, i love you." i said kissing her lips again. she started to cry again. i whipped her tears away." shhh don't cry." i said. "they are Happy tears." she smiled.