I could've lied. I could've told you I could save you, even though the only thing that could save me from depression was death.
I could've said pills didn't help. They just cause problems, but there's no more room in my cabinets.
I could've took your scared wrists and kissed them and said it gets better, but as far as I know happy ever after never existed
I could've pleaded. I could have got down on my knees and asked you, no, begged you to stop.
To not let pain and fear control you, I could've told you we would be together forever.
I could've cried my eyes out and said I would never be happy without you. You would've stayed. I know it.
I could've bribed. Told you we could run away. We would've been happy.
Two kids in love, against the monsters in the world,not just in the houses they made us call our homes.
Memories were not our friends and you would've easily agreed to leave anywhere.
Especially with me.
I could've taken it back. Strong words were said, and my weak lips couldn't hold them back.
I knew it was wrong, but alcohol is in your veins, its hard to tell a lover from a stranger.
Only when you left did I realize that I was the reason you were gone and I had no funeral clothes.
I could have said I love you.
The way your tongue ran over your lips when you're nervous, the way your hands twitch when you write, the way when you tell me you love me your eyes got bright.
When you weren't around I would act like you didn't deserve me, but it was I who didn't deserve you.
The same face I loved looks up from a casket, but its not the same.
This face knows me as the horrors I am.