I go home after the long day at hell. The drive home is an escape from everything; home, school, life. But going home doesn’t help me at all. From the outside, it looks like a normal two story house; four bedrooms, 3 and a half bath, windows and shutters- normal. But it is far from it. I walk into the door and the yelling has already commenced.
“You are a no good bitch that sits on their ass all day!” screams David.
“I slave every day and put hot food on this table!” Meredith retorts.
“You are never grateful for all the work I do to have that money.”
I walk upstairs and ignore the constant yelling. I am about to go into my room and hide in there until the sun begins to show but I have two little girls to take care of. I go down the hall and knock on the light pink door and then the blue one next door. Seconds later the doors open simultaneously and two little girls open the doors and stick their heads out.
“Liddy!” they yell, grabbing my legs and smiling.
I look to my left leg and the 11 year old little girl with two braids and a dress on has a gabbed tooth smile and I say “Hello Lottie”. Then I look to my right and the girl with an almost exact replica except for the paint caking her hands and across her face and a French braid reaching to the middle of her back. “And hello Lena” I say.
“I have a game tonight. Are you going to come?” asks Lottie.
Shoot I forgot about that. “Yeah I am taking you tonight Lottie. Are you good with that?”
She smiles wide and says “Yeah I would love that! I have been saving up money. Maybe we can go get ice cream afterwards?”
“Um well… Lena has to come with us.”
“Of course she does! She’s my twin she is coming whether she wants to or not!”
“Are you good with that Lena?”
She looks at me and in a very serious tone speaks the words “its ice cream. Of course I want to some.”
We laugh and I send the girls to their room to get cleaned up. I follow suit and go to my room to finish getting cleaned up as well. I take a look in the mirror and I don’t recognize the girl staring back at me. She is frail and scared. Dull brown hair with awkward layers framing a face with freckles and average blue eyes. I have a decent body and I guess nice boobs. But how would I know. I am not overweight but I am not toned. My legs are sort of lengthy, giving me my 5’7” stature and they are decent. I feel average; not great but not boring. It bothers me. I discard these feelings and start to clean up for the game.
Teeth brushed- check.
Hair in a bun- check.
Comfy clothes on- check.
I knock on the girls’ doors and the two of them bound out of their rooms and are way too excited for 6:30 at night. I am ready for bed, to gain some peace and quiet but I clearly can’t. The yelling has seized downstairs and it is a bit worrisome. I take the girls down and my mother is sitting on the couch, wine in hand and looking like nothing bad has ever happened.
“Are you okay mom?” I ask, hesitantly.
“Oh! Liddy! Yes everything is fine! Why would you think otherwise?” She replies in a cheery voice, hiding any despair that might embody her.
“Ok… Lottie has a soccer game. I need the SUV. My Jeep won’t fit everything.”
Her eyes turn to me and I can see fire in them. “You can’t ask politely?”
“Sorry. I didn’t really think-“
She cuts me off. “You didn’t think is right!” she screams.
“I am sorry! I have to go or Lottie is going to be late!”
“Don’t raise your voice at me missy!”
“Can I please have the SUV?”
She ignores me and I go and take the keys from the dish where she keeps them. Real mature mom.