One of my thoughts went on the driver of the other car as our vehicles collided and my passenger door caved in but then every cell of my body was working on screaming. Screaming so loud I was on fire with it. Like it was vital to my survival and if I stopped I wouldn’t be sure of my being alive. But I couldn’t hear my voice over all the noise.
So much noise.
Glass shattering and cracking and crunching. Metal crumpling and creaking and bending.
As well as noise there was heat.
Something was burning. Me or the car or the road or the trees or the Earth. It was too hot and I felt my skin grow tight, shrieking till I couldn’t breathe. I could taste fire and blood and helplessness.
But more prominent than the heat and the sound was the fear. I was crushed by the weight of it. The air squeezed out of me. The life dragged from me. My thoughts not stringing together as the second wore on.
And then there was the pain. Slivers of glass searing my skin. Impact crunching my bones. Blood flowing. Breaths gasping. Heart in trouble now.
But how it felt, I could never say. The English language was too kind a mother tongue for such words.
The horizon was spinning. I caught glimpses of it as I flipped over, my head hitting the ceiling of the car, my limbs whipping about as though independent of my body. There was no up, there was no down, there was only round and round and round and round.
Dizziness and sickness and the never ending spinning.
A hint of green in the otherwise black and red.
As I spun and turned and danced through the night, the one thought not concentrating on breathing and screaming fell on the person I’d been trying to save.
Her stunning huge jade eyes that looked further into my heart than anything else on Earth. That classic blush and smile. Her chestnut brown hair that fell in tidy waves. Her fairy stories and dreams of being a princess. Her massive heart filled with kindness and the willing always to do good. Too good. She had always been too good.
And I had tried to do good. And it had got me here.
Flipping into the early morning, wondering if everything had been in vain.
Though of course I was only wondering for a second because then my car, my horrible, gorgeous, little teal car, rolled into a tree driver’s side first and everything stopped.
No more noise. No more fire. No more fear. No more pain. No more spinning. No more thoughts.
No more Abia Amelia Angel.
My death was hot, fierce, loud, and cruel. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
That moment was the last of my short life. But it only lasted a second.
And then everything was over.