Voices (Lashton)

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  • Published: 28 Oct 2014
  • Updated: 20 Jul 2016
  • Status: Complete
My eyes widen. "M'not gay Lucas." I mumble. "Right. Says the one who was making out with a guy on his bedroom floor." I hear him smirk. "Screw you." I say and he chuckles. Where Ashton tries to ignore the voice in his head and fails miserably at it.

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16. Light Bulb Went On

I wince as I sit up and glare at my clock even though it didn't go off yet but I know it will cause yeah know, that's what they do.

Might as well get up. I throw the blankets off me before shutting my alarm off so it doesn't go off. I grab clothes out and change, not even gonna shower. I'll take one tonight.

I slowly make my way down stairs and I earn a confused expression from my mum when I sit down and wince a little.

"Honey are you okay?" She asks and I force a smile.

I nod my head even though it's a total lie. She sighs. "Not talking today?"

I shake my head and frown as I take out the apple juice from the fridge and pour myself a cup slowly.

I drink it all and put my cup in the sink, ignoring my mums concerned looks I go back up to my room.

I go into my bathroom and brush my teeth then I try to tame my bed head, but fail and just let it go.

I go into the mirror and kick myself in the ass for not putting my contacts back. I look at my choice of clothing. A burgundy sweater and blue jeans. My hair is semi tame I guess.

I don't always wear them, -my contacts, because I always wear clothes- it's just some days my sight is bad and today's one of those days but me being me forgot to put them away last time I used them.

Well guess I've got to use my glasses today.

I groan and walk over to my bedside table and grab out my case and take out my glasses and put them on.

I go over to my mirror again and cringe at the reflection staring back at me.

God I look like a nerd....

Eh I've been called way worse.

"Ashton, Calum's here!" I hear my mum yell and I furrow my eyebrows.

I make my way down stairs and see Calum leaning against the wall. He sees me and his smile grows.

"Hey, wanna a ride?" He ask and I raise an eyebrow and he narrows his eyes at me. "Not like that you idiot. Go get your stuff."

I shake my head and run up to my room grabbing everything I'll need for school.

I go back down and follow Calum to his car, the drive to school is still a little awkward. No one moves to turn on the radio.

We pull up to the school and I get out before Calum. I quickly go into the school and run to my locker.

I try to unlock it but fail and try again but fail again. I do it a few more times but it still doesn't unlock.

Today's just not my day....

I look around and see Michael and Tony make there way over with smirks. I mentally freak out.

"Ashton." He says shoving his hands into his pockets.

I gulp and bite my lip. Shit he's gonna beat me up.

"Michael." I hear someone yell and I turn my head to see Calum coming our way.

"Cal, hey. Nice timing." He says sending me a smirk.

Calum looks confused but sees me and looks panicked.

"Ashton." Calum says coming to stand next to Michael in front of me.

"So how many cuts did you do yesterday?" Michael asks smirking and I feel my heart beat faster.

No, no, no, no, no. He couldn't know..... He's just saying that.

Unless Calum told him. My gaze goes to Calum who looks just as shocked. So maybe Calum didn't tell him....

I keep my mouth shut. I know he just wants to get some reaction out of me.

Maybe if I talked or something he'd leave me alone.

"Oh so it's true. You do cut? Where? You wrists? Thighs? Stomach?" Michael says and I feel my whole body heat up. I've never done my thighs before.....

"Ash....." Calum says and my gaze sweeps from Michael to him.

Michael looks at Calum with raised eyebrows. "Ash? No one calls him that anymore." Michael scoffs.

"Well, I do- sometimes." Cal says awkwardly.

"Whatever.... Cal, you gonna join Tony and I?" He says and I plead Calum with my eyes.

"Go ahead." Calum says shaking his head taking a step back, eyes fixed on me and I feel a blow to my stomach.

I feel tears well in my eyes, not from his blow but because the cuts.

"Awe is Ashwipe gonna fucking cry?" Michael sneers. "Fucking baby."

I clutch my stomach and he grabs a fist full of my hair and smacks my head against the lockers.

He brings his face really close to mine, so close I can see the mixes of green in his eyes.

"Your nothing but a wast of space. Scum on the bottom of peoples shoes. Your an emo freak who doesn't have the balls to kill himself." Michael says serious with a voice Ice cold and hard.

He knees me in my stomach again and punches me in the face. I fall to the ground clutching my stomach and face.

He scowls and walks off. Calum looks at me with sad eyes and slowly backs away and finally turns and follows Michael.

Well, he didn't help out so that's a good thing. I think.

I make my way to the bathroom and I lean against the wall in the farthest stall from the door.

I push my hair out of my face and I shove my hand in my pocket and feel the cool metal.....

I take it out and bite my lip, debating if I really want to end it here.

I'm just a wast of space like Michael said.

Scum on peoples shoes.

An emo freak.....

All of a sudden someone's knocking on the stall door and I jump away, dropping the blade by accident and it slides out under the door.

Well shit.

All of a sudden I hear a sharp intake of a breath and they bend down picking up my blade as I hold my breath.

They bang on the stall door. "Ashton I know your in there. Open up. Please."

I freeze when I hear Luke's voice. The real person Luke, the one who didn't call me annoying or to tell me to shut the fuck up.

"I - I know what I said was wrong. I didn't mean it. I swear." He says and his voice cracks.

I grow confused. He didn't say anything wrong to me.....

Only the voice named Luke..... In.... My..... Head.....

It's like a light bulb went on in my head and my eyes widen.

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