Voices (Lashton)

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  • Published: 28 Oct 2014
  • Updated: 2 Feb 2017
  • Status: Complete
My eyes widen. "M'not gay Lucas." I mumble.

"Right. Says the one who was making out with a guy on his bedroom floor." I hear him smirk.

"Screw you." I say and he chuckles.

Where Ashton tries to ignore the voice in his head and fails miserably at it.


40. "It's all a prank."

Hey people. So sorry I took a while for this but here's the chapter.

I enjoyed writing this.

So I hope this chapter is longer than usual....

Don't kill me for the beginning....

I wrote half of this watching Party Of 5 and the other half listening to Drop In The Ocean on repeat.

So I hope your Thursday and Friday are awesome.

Don't forget to fave, fan and comment!!

And check my other story's out to?

Thanks, love you guys.

~ Abbigail

Luke's hands trail down my sides as he places feather like kisses on my exposed shoulder.

I sigh as I lean back onto him.

"Do you love me Luke?" I ask quietly, scared that I heard him wrong the night before.

He chuckles but it sends unpleasant chills down my back unlike usual and his grip on my tightens a tad.

"Oh Ashton..... Stupid, naive Ashton." He pulls back and my heart hammers loudly in my chest.

"What-?" I start to say but his bitter laugh breaks it off.

"You really thought I loved you? It's all a prank! Michael and me did this to see of how much of a faggot you really are. It's all my idea. He was just as happy to go along with it." Luke sneers at me and I feel my eyes water.

He leans in really close to my face and I whimper, backing up but he grabs my wrists, holding them tightly and blood starts rushing down my arms and all over me and my bed. "Fucking faggot. So your answer, no. I never loved you. That voice that always tormented you in your head? Yeah, that was me. I acted all nice and sweet to gain your trust so we could pull this off. I haven't had this much fun in a very, very long time."

Tears are mixed in with blood now on my face as I wipe my cheeks.

I feel something in the palm of my hand, I look and see it's a blade and Luke's laughter fills my head.

He then grabs it from me and grabs my arm, pushing the blade hard on my arm so more blood flows and I begin to feel light headed.

"No one will ever truly love you Ashton. If the own voice in your head doesn't love you then no one will." Luke says and darkness takes over.

Thank god.




I sit up gasping for air as my eyes shoot open I notice someone beside me making me fall back and I guess I go a little to far because I fall off the bed with a loud thud.

Luke shoots up and looks around panicked but his gaze softens when he sees me and goes to a confused one.

"Ash, you okay? Why are you on the ground?" He asks frowning once he notices my tear stained cheeks.

I curl myself in a ball in the corner of my room, scratching at my scars and some break open and bleed again.

I want to stop but I just can't bring myself to. I deserve this.

This is all a joke.

No one will ever love me.

I'm useless.

I close my eyes slightly rocking back and forth.

"Shit," I hear Luke whisper to himself before I hear him make his way over to me. "Ashton, hey Ash. Stop." He puts his hand on my shoulder and I flinch back and scream.

He retracts his hand quickly looking hurt and very confused.

"It's all a prank." I mumble with wide eyes.

"Ashton." Luke whispers and I look at his face. He reaches out to touch me but I flinch and cower away from him closing my eyes as if he'll disappear.

I hear him and sigh and his feet padding over to most likely his pants.

"Yeah Calum? I- I've gotta problem." Yeah I'm the problem. He's probably plotting some stupid thing to hurt me. "Like, I don't know. Just-" he chokes on a sob. "Please come here."

He ends the call and looks back over at me before slowly walking towards me, making me start to panick.

"No Ashton, Ashton. It's okay. What's wrong. Please tell me what's wrong." He says sitting on his knees and he lightly touches me arm making the dream come back full force and I cry out hiding my face. "What did I do?" He sobs out and I just cry.

Like full on, hard crying, with the puffy eyes and runny nose.

"Luke?!" My eyes shoot open wide with fear. Calum's gonna beat me up.

"In here." Luke mumbles and I don't know how but Calum hears him and comes in the room right as those words leave Luke's mouth.

Calum takes one look at me and then looks back at Luke worried, confused and nervous.

"What happened?" Calum asks Luke who just shrugs his shoulders.

"He won't talk." He says then looks up at Calum. "I just want to hold him so badly. Make everything better."

"What did you do? Wait- did you tell him?"

"It's all a joke. All a prank. Doesn't mean anything." I mumble out loud enough for them to hear me as they both look at me worried and confused.

"What? What's a joke and prank?" Calum asks getting down to my level as my leg are pinned to my body with my arms wrapped tightly around them.

I just notice now that Luke's in boxers now.

I look at Luke and he try's to put his hand on my knee again but I flinch, screaming as I back up more.

"I can't even touch him Calum. What's wrong with him? What happened, what did I do? I swear I didn't tell him, he's not ready." Luke says bursting into a new batch of tears.

Calum puts a hand on Luke's shoulder.

"Ashton..... Can you tell me what happened?" Calum asks me. I look over at Luke then back at Calum.

He seems to get the message and looks at Luke who looks heart broken.

Luke just nods his head and walks out of the room, not sure where he's gonna go in his boxers.

But this Luke so who knows.

"Now you wanna tell me?" Calum asks when the doors clicks shut.

I take a shaky breath.

"It's all a joke. A prank. Right?" I ask quietly and I cringe at how hurt and scratchy my voice is.

"What is?" He asks me.

"Everything. No one really loves me right? It's all a test. A prank. A joke. His idea, Michael went along with it." I mumble out and Calum looks confused but nods his head indicting I can continue.

"Luke- he. I asked him if he loved me but he called me stupid and a faggot and said no one will ever truly love me." I say sobbing and Calum looks shocked and even more lost then before.

I quickly add, "It was so real, I woke up wanting to kill myself Calum........ Scared that it's all true."

He then seems to notice that it's as all a dream- nightmare. All a nightmare.

He sighs and gently places his hand on my knee and all I do is flinch.

"Ashton, Luke would never hurt you on purpose. Do you know how much that doofus loves you? I hear about you every single day. I know like almost every detail about you. A new fact a day." He says and I weakly chuckle.

"I'm serious. I know possibly more about you then you know yourself." He says fully sitting beside me.

"How?" I whisper.

"Can't say Ash. That's against the rules. Sure yeah Luke's broken so, so many already but that's the golden rule. He would be in so much crap. Probably tortured to near death. Well that is if they go easy on him, if not then he's screwed." He says and my eyes widen.

Okay so I kinda know why Luke won't tell me.

"But knowing Luke, he'll tell you when your both ready for that step. Your nightmare will never come true. That boy would die for you. Yeah he broke a rule and talked to you but I guess he did it for a great reason. Even if you weren't ready at all." Calum says and I sigh.

"Ash?" We both look up to see Luke standing in my door way with a pale face and puffy red eyes. "I would never hurt you. I love you, so much." He says walking over to me.

"I've got a question." Calum says after a few minutes.

"Yeah?" Luke says gently taking my hand and he smiles when I don't flinch.

"Why is Ashton naked?" My eyes widen and Luke's cheeks flush along with my whole body.

"Uh," Luke coughs and I look down at the floor beside me.

Calum sighs. "I'm gonna take it you didn't have boxers on when you called me did you?" He looks at Luke who scratches the back of his neck.

"Nope." He says.

Calum groans and covers his face with his hands making me giggle.

Luke pulls me into his lap and wraps his arms around me as my legs go around his waist.

"You guys are so cute it makes me want to vomit." Calum says laughing and I bury my face into Luke's neck.

"Did you guys have sex last night?" Luke coughs and looks at Calum with wide blue eyes.

"What? Why the hell would you ask that?" Luke says placing his left hand on my hip while he grabs the blanket that's halfway off the bed and wraps it around my lower half, covering me from Calum's eyes.

"Well because of what I heard on the phone yesterday and you guys were naked this morning. And you didn't come home last night." He says and I mentally agree with him.

He does make a good point.

"Calum, no. We did not have sex." Luke says and I giggle into his neck making him shiver.

"Ohh so what did you guys do?"

"Nothing of your concern Calum Thomas Hood." Luke says and Calum fake gasps.

"Wait, your middle name is Thomas?" I say and then I burst into a fit of giggles.

"Hey don't laugh at me Fletcher." Cal says and I stop laughing and grow serious.

"How do you know my middle name? I never told anyone it." I say.

Calum smirks and shrugs his shoulders. "Like I said, a fact a day. I knew that a long time ago Ash. Before we even met." He says.

"Right. What else do you know about me?" I ask turning around a little and Luke tenses.

I smirk thinking about something and pull the blanket over our heads and I grab Luke through his boxers and he's about to gasp but I kiss him hard to shut him up. I quickly slip my hand in his blue boxers and flick my wrist pumping him quickly as I kiss him hard to make sure he's quiet.

I wipe my thumb over the slit, spreading the pre-cum and his hips jerk forward a little making me press down harder onto him to keep him down.

In a matter of a minutes he's coming undone in my hand panting slightly, coming down from his high.

He looks at me with big blue eyes and I'm just now wondering here that courage randomly came from. Not that I'm complaining or anything.

I bring my hand up to my mouth and he watches me as I lick up what's on my hand.

He then puts his hand on the back of my neck and presses his lips to mine, tongue roaming every inch of my mouth.

I pull back and pull the blanket off of us and turn to face a red confused faced Calum, my back up against Luke's chest where I can hear his heart beating fast.

"Uh," Is all Calum says.

"So what do you know about me?" I say casually as I wipe up some more of Luke's fluids that's on his thighs.

I lick it up from my finger and Calum's eyes widen. "Uh what just happened?"

"Nothing that concerns you Calum." Luke says still sounding a little breathless and confused.

"Um I just witnessed something weird and I want to know what happened." Calum says.

"Luke just-" I get cut off by Luke pinching my side.

"I just nothing." He cuts in.

"Lucifer, he wants to know so might as well tell him." I say and he groans putting his face in my neck.

"I just got Luke off with my hand in a matter of minutes." I say and Calum's eyes widen and Luke groans while hiding his face behind me.

"Um and, you were licking up-?" I nod my head and he bites his lip looking anywhere but me and Luke.

"That's why he's clean." Calum says and I snicker as Luke's hold tightens on me.

"Okay new topic." Luke says and I burst out laughing.

"He's not that clean, I mean, yeah I got most of it but there still some on his boxers." I say only embarrassing Luke more.

"New topic please! I beg of you." Luke says.

"Okay fine. Back to your question Ashton. I know a bunch of stuff. I know about your family and about your personal life to." He says and I nod my head.

"Right. Okay." I say and he then smirks at Luke but then looks back at me.

"So, how big is Luke?" Calum asks and I burst out laughing, clutching my stomach while Luke falls backwards and covers his face with his hands.

"Fuck. You. Calum." Luke says and Calum and I high five.

"I hate you both." Luke tells us.

"Awe Lukey. You love me and we all know it." I say turning around and kissing Luke's chest, right over his heart.

He sits up and holds me close. "Yeah I love you. So, so much."

"Awe so adorable. I'm gonna go now. I'll message you guys later." Calum says leaving after we say goodbye.

I place my hands on Luke's cheeks. "I'm sorry about this morning." I say.

He places his hands on top of mine. "It scared me Ash. I thought I did something wrong to upset you or hurt you." He says frowning.

I match his expression. "It was just a nightmare."

"But that's not what it seemed like this morning, right?" He asks softly.

I look down. "No. I thought it was real."

"What happened in it?"

I take a deep breath. "Well. You. Um you told me that this all was a joke. A prank. Said I was stupid and naive and that no one would ever love me....." I trail off not wanting to continue.

"A-Ashton. What happened after that?" I hear the tears in Luke's voice as it cracks.

"Yo-u grabbed my wrists and held them tightly, making them bleed badly them you gave me my razor....... And- and then you cut me..... And I bled even more and I go into darkness and that's when I woke up. I saw you and I freaked out." I say sobbing as the dream comes back.

"Fucking hell Ashton I would never hurt you. I love you so much it hurts not being with you." He says wiping my eyes and I can't help but smile.

"I love you to Luke. So fucking much." I whisper kissing him.

"Luke, you got your jizz on the blanket!" I say as I feel something sticky on on my hand.

He chuckles, taking the blanket off of me and throws it somewhere while kissing my again, and who am I to deny kissing Luke Hemming's?

My arms go around his neck while his are around my torso.

"Ashton are you- oh shit." I quickly pull away from Luke and keep my hands over my semi hard on.

How awkward. "I didn't know you had someone over."

I blush. "Um yeah he's been over sense last night."

"And why are you naked?" She asks smirking while raising an eyebrow.

My whole body flushes. "Um."

"I'm gonna take it Luke didn't wake up in boxers either?" She asks and Luke blushes to.

"Uh no." I say and Luke shoot me a look.

"What? She asked so I answered her." I say about to put my hands up but them remember I'm hiding my hard on from my mum.

"She also asked you why your naked yet you didn't answer that." She says putting her hands on her hips.

"Mum why are you here?" I ask growing impatient from hiding my hard on and I just want to ponce on Luke to get rid of it.

"I live here." She says smirking and I roll my eyes.

"No I mean like in my room." I say throwing my hands up getting irritated and my mum averts her gaze away from me and Luke's eyes widen and I notice my hands aren't covering me anymore.

I groan and I don't even cover myself anymore.

"I just wanted to know why I heard screaming up here before but I think I know why now." She says still not looking at me.

"What- shit no that's not- what the hell mum? No that didn't happen." I say my face going red at the thought of Luke and I doing that.

On how amazing he would look on top of me, while I claw at his back while making whimpers and moans come from Luke as he pounds into me hitting my- okay that's not helping standing naked in front of Luke himself and my mum.

I cover myself again. "Get out mum." I say and she chuckles and Luke's gaze goes from my face to my now, raging hard on and back to my face over and over again.

She laughs. "Right, just there's condoms under your sink. Love you stay safe." She says before leaving me, my raging hard on and a half naked Luke.

Thanks mum.

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