Dad and Alice went to her ballet class once again. Ashton told me to wear something warm and that he'll be here any minute.
The ride was quiet. It felt like a holiday, when people in their houses and streets are empty. I've seen a few cars.. But not too many.
"Where are we going?"
"Some place special."
"You'll love it don't worry."
I kept in silence for the rest of the ride cause I knew more questions wouldn't help me get any more information.
He stopped the car.
"You forgot the way or.."
"What am I looking at exactly?"
It was an empty field. Larger than a football one. Grass that seemed to not end, and a huge tree, pretty far from us, but yet noticeable.
He reached his hand to hold mine's "that's the place I used to escape to when I was about your age.. Maybe a bit younger." He started walking.
"Escape from what?"
"Kids from school.." He spotted a place and set down, I did as well. "Family sometimes.."
"How would you get here? We drove."
"Ran. A lot. I used bike most of the time, but when I really felt like letting out energy, I ran."
"Who knows about this?"
"Me. You now. And Michael. The one with the.."
"Red hair. I know. Why the others don't know as well?"
"It wouldn't be an escape if so many people had known about it, right?"
He laid on his back with his palms supporting the back of his head.
I kept looking at the field's dark view, and he stared at the stars.
"Why are we here? I mean.. Why you wanted to show this to me?"
"If you need an escape and I'm not around, come here."
I laid down on my back next to him, rewinding in my mind the sentence he just said..
We didn't speak, just kept staring at the sky.
I wonder what he thinks about me.. Every time we fight, every time we make up, every time we kiss, every time I touch his face.. What he feels.. Is it the same as what I feel?
"We should leave.. What's the time?"
"My phone is in the car.."
"Well so as mine."
Time has passed so quickly I forgot about dad.
"C'mon." I got up and reached my hand to support him.
He grabbed it and pulled me so I was on top of him "long time since we've been in this position.." A tiny smile spread on his face
"We need to leave. My dad.."
He put his index finger in my mouth "shh. He'll wait."
"What's that mood that's got into you? We had enough time to fool around.. Now please, let's leave." I got up
"Just text him you're with Emma or something and we'll go to my place." He stood up
I started walking "I can't."
He didn't respond. Just followed me.
Lucky me there were no missed calls or text messages, only one text message from Emma that I didn't even bother open but that's all.
"It was fun." I kissed his cheek "I need to go now.. Bye." I opened the door.
He grabbed my wrist "wait."
"We're having band practice tomorrow..."
"I really want to come.. But.." I sighed "my dad will notice I'm all the time 'at Emma's'.. he hates that. She hardly comes over.. I don't know."
"We'll stay longer this time if you wanna."
"I'll text you. okay?"
"Yeah" A tiny smile again "sleep tight baby." He kissed my forehead
When I walked in, the house was dark. Everybody seemed to be asleep and I didn't ask myself too many question. I went upstairs, did my night routine, and fell asleep.
Dad with his morning paper and coffee, and me with my burned toast.
"That's bread. How hard could it possibly be." He laughed quietly
"I heard that.."
"Didn't mean to hide it darling."
"Mmm." He kept reading the paper without giving me too much attention. Like always.
"What do you think about me getting a job?"
"You sure you'll handle it?" He giggled "I mean.. A toast.. Really."
"C'mon stop it.. I won't cook. Maybe a waitress I don't know."
"How come you thought about that?"
"I want to feel more independent.. Feel like I worked for this shirt.. things like that."
"You want me to help you to get a job interview?"
All I wanted to do was him to think I'm going to work, while I'm actually with Ashton. Without using Emma all the time. I guess a job was a bad idea.
"No I got this. I'm independent."
"First, don't burn your toast. Then, use that word." He cleaned up his mess and grabbed the car keys "I'll wait for you in the car."
I'm more 'independent' than he thinks. I'm practically a woman now so..
So I should get this out of my mind. Just the thought he might find out...
Em tried to talk to me in school today. I ignored her. She of course didn't understand why, but I also wasn't feeling like explaining stuff at the moment.
Dad picked me up and left for work. Alice was at a friend's house, studying for a test I think.
I texted Ashton:
"I made something up. We're good."
"I'm leaving early today. I'll be there at 5. Kisses"
I told dad I'm leaving for the job interview and he kept asking if I want him to take me. Somehow I convinced him to stay home and watch Alice cause she's younger and needs blah blah. He agreed.
When we arrived, we went straight into the garage. Calum with his bass, tuning it, and Luke and Michael arguing about riffs.
Calum waved at me with a tiny smile and I waved back. He's a sweetheart.
"Ohh you brought audience today Ashton.. Hey Zoey." Michael waved
I have to say, it made me feel better. It's like the opposite of what happened last time. The ignoring.
"Calum catch him up." Luke said
He turned to face Ashton "We're doing beside you." Then turned back "Couldn't you do it on your own?"
"Shut up." Luke replied
I just enjoyed watching them.
After they played a few songs, Michael and Luke went to bring water bottles.
"I've never heard that song before.. What band is it?"
"5 seconds of summer." Calum answered "they're not as good as we are though."
Ashton smiled and I didn't understand why.
"Do they have more songs?"
"How come I haven't heard from them?"
"You know what.. I don't know." He looked back at Ashton
"What's going on?"
Calum left quickly without saying anything
"Where did he go?" I went to his drum kit area
"Forget about him.." He got up "come here." He pulled me closer. Stroked my cheek gently with his finger "I've been dying to kiss you for so long.."
"And I know it isn't the right place or the right time but I.."
They all walked back in with water bottles and smiles on their faces.
"Interrupting you two?" Luke leaned against the large door frame with a big smile on his face
"Let them love Luke." Calum added
"Good one bro." Michael added with a punch on Ashton's shoulder
Ashton lead me to the couch and went to whisper something to Calum.
Calum smiled to Ashton's words and I wondered if it was about me.
The band practice has finished and we're both in his car, heading to my house.
"Did you have fun?"
"Yeah.. It's nice seeing you like that. All.. Happy."
He looked at me and then back on the road with a smile "do we have time.. Or.."
"No I need to get home."
The smile wasn't on his face anymore
"Don't get upset.. We'll do it another time." I stroked his hair
He played music instead keeping the conversation going.
Dad left a note saying him and Alice went to pick a new pair of ballet shoes and all I thought was why didn't I stay with a Ashton.
I opened my room door and Emma was there, sitting on my bed, just like Ashton did a while ago.
"Your dad let me in."
"You weren't answering my texts so I had to come."
"Leave Emma." I picked a pajama
"What did I do to you?"
"You really don't know.." I laughed sarcastically "how shocking.."
"What is that supposed to mean?!"
"Nothing.. Nothing.. Now, can you please leave? I need to get into the shower."
"Zoey." She slammed the door before I managed to get out "you will sit and explain what happened. I don't remember not because I don't want to."
"I'm done Emma."
"Fine. You want me to start talking about the things I've done for you? On how many times I got phone calls from your dad asking where the hell are you? On how many times he almost came over cause I told him you're in the bathroom and can't talk right now? On how many times I risked myself for you without expecting a paying back? You want to end this friendship? Go ahead. But just remember I've always been here for you, and I haven't stopped for a second. So think twice."
She left me speechless. It doesn't change the fact I was still mad at her. Mad at her behavior lately.
"You don't know."
"That's all you have to say.."
"What do you want me to say? Maybe remind you you got drunk at my own birthday party, that I didn't even want from the first place. That nobody knew it was a birthday party, just some beers and music. That you used me. That me and Michael stayed after it to clean after your freaking mess. That you get into things that aren't even yours without asking or considering my opinion on it. Or maybe remind you that it's my goddamn boyfriend and I don't need a life couch for it."
"Is that what you think? That I'm some bitch who gets into other people's life?"
I didn't answer her.
"Don't be a pussy. Say what you think."
"I want you to leave my house."
"I'm not leaving this place until you answer."
"Yes. That's who you are. Happy?"
"That's always nice to find out who your really friends are." She grabbed her jacket "bye friend." And left my room
After I heard the front door slamming I bursted into tears. Cause from that second, we were nothing to each other.