Behind the Lyrics

Ever wonder who the girl behind the song is? Vanessa was a good girl who studied hard and focused on achieving her dads goals of moving back to America and going to Harvard. She thought that was her dream as well until she meet someone who changed her whole meaning of life.


17. chapter 17

Luke took me back to the abandoned house that we went to the first night we snuck out. I flung myself onto the couch and began to sob again. Our car ride was very quiet, I spent the time silently sobbing trying to avoid a total breakdown. "I'm so sorry." I said again. Luke sat down right next to me pulling me into his arms. "Vanessa I told you it's ok. What you're dad said didn't hurt me I've heard way worse than that." "I just can't believe he said those things. You are just so important to me and you should be important to him to." "Hey as long as I am important to you that's all that matters. You're dad was just shocked." I laughed and rolled my eyes, yes yes he was. Luke wasn't like the other guys I had brought home he was so much better. "Can I tell you something?" I began to speak up after a moment of silence. "Of course." He said kissing my head, "you can tell me anything." I took a deep breathe as I began to relive terrible memories. "You stopped me from one of my anxiety attacks. That was the first time I didn't have a total mental breakdown." I said looking into his blue eyes. He gave me a confused smirk. "What do you mean?"

"Remember all those trophies and stuff from my room? Well I got those all when I was 16 and younger. That's when the idea of me attending Harvard came about when I was 16. My dad looked into it and found out what I had to do to achieve a scholarship into the advanced program. I began to take advance classes that were a year and some even two over my grade level and joined 4 different clubs being the president and leader of 3 of them, and was in dance, tennis, and volleyball. I did all that on top of trying to maintain a social life. My life was a literal hell, I barely got any sleep and was hardly eating, I lost 15 pounds. One day I was studying for my advanced calculus test while planning my week and couldn't solve this one problem. I began to freak out and shake and cry and the room tightened up and I don't really remember much after that. I actually woke up in the hospital and my mom told me I was screaming uncontrollably and shaking. I had freak outs before multiple times but never like that. My doctor told my parents that I had lost too much sleep and was losing too much weight and that all my activities and school work was too much for a 16 year old to be handling and that I needed to drop a lot. I remember how disappointed my dad was. So I ended up dropping the things that made me actually happy like dance and music and my art class. I even had to stop going to school for a week. I stopped playing tennis and volleyball and resigned as leader of the clubs still staying involved but not as highly. I was allowed luckily to take a music class dropping my second history class." I began to cry again. I had never really told anyone this feeling as if they would judge me but after today I felt like Luke needed to know, he needed to know how much of a freak I was. I was waiting for him to get up and leave, but instead he pulled me in lifted my chin up and kissed me. I was shocked. "I know I'm a freak." I said when we pulled away. "So far from it." He said leaning into me. "I don't know where this is going but I just felt like I needed to tell you that." We got quiet for a minute as we looked at each other in the eyes. "Vanessa, I don't know if this is the wrong time, but I think you're an amazing person. I've never meet anyone like you and I've never felt this was before. Vanessa, will you be my girlfriend." I was shocked. I opened up to him completely expecting him to want to run away and instead he wanted to get closer. I felt my eyes water. "Of course!" I said with much enthusiasm pulling him in to kiss him. I was a mess but he liked that. We broke apart and I had the biggest smile on my face my mood went from competently depressed to thrilled in one second and I was so happy. "Come on let's get out of here." He said pushing my hair back and wiping all the tears from my eyes.

It was midnight now as we were at a tiny little dinner. He had ordered us coffee and we say there getting lost in each other's eyes. It was kinda magical. "I don't want to go home." I said to him. "Eventually you will have to Vanessa." Why was he so right. "I know just not tonight." I whined. "Want to stay with me?" He offered. "Yes. But would your mom allow it?" I wanted to stay with him but knew their was no way his mom would let me spend the night at his place. "Vanessa she is in love with you, of course she would, she would do anything for you to be honest." That made me smile, I wish my parents loved Luke the way his family loved me. "Only if it's ok with you." Luke just laughed. "Let's go." He said tossing some money on to table.

We got to his house and he pointed to the sky, "look up." The sky was beautiful that night. I looked at him and he was already looking at me. It was like a scene from some cheesy chick flick but I loved it. I pushed him a little when he smiled at me, he just pulled me in and kissed my forehead. "Hello Vanessa, honey are you ok?" Liz said. My eyes were still puffy from all the crying. "Yeah I'm fine." I said as she pulled me in for a hug. "Mum is it ok if Vanessa stays the night here." "Of course!!! Is everything ok sweetie." I smiled and signed "just some problems at home but everything will be ok." Liz smiled at me hugging me again. "Alright well it's late you too look like you need some sleep night you two." Liz said shoving us off to bed.

Luke gave me some basketball shorts and a large tshirt to change in to. I had to triple tie them because they were extremely baggy but it's ok. "So what time do you need to wake up for school tomorrow?" Luke said to me going to set an alarm. "I'm not going to school tomorrow." I said cuddling on his bed. "Wow look you Miss.rebel." I just winked at him. He jumped on the bed grabbing me around the waist and cuddling me close. We both were uncontrollably laughing as we banged heads. "Well guess that means it's bed time. Good night beautiful." Luke said kissing me and laying down. I cuddled into his arms. What a perfect a perfect way to fall asleep.

I woke up still cuddled into Luke's arms. I had never slept to still at night, I was usually all over the place flinging my arms around. I looked at the time, it was noon. I softly but smoothly got out of Luke's arms and out of the bed. I looked into his mirror, I looked like a disaster. The bags under my eyes were huge and covered job black mascara, my hair was all over the place. I looked like I needed a shower. I tried to someone fix my face and hair when I heard Luke groaning, "good morning beautiful." He said. I smiled at him. He had the most sexy morning voice it was so deep and sexy. "Hungry?" He said to me. I nodded.

Nobody was home at him house as Luke looked around the house for something for us to eat. "Can I just have toast?" I said watching him struggle to get the ingredients for pancakes ready. He laughed as he began to make the toast. "So you sleep good?" He asked. "Perfectly." "Me too." He said as I got up and put my arms around him and kissed him. We stood in his kitchen making out when the sudden smell of something burning hit our nose. We looked at he toaster as burnt pieces of toast popped up. We stood there laughing so hard I felt the tears again, but the good kind.

While Luke got dressed I checked my phone. I hadn't checked it since I was in my room doing homework with Luke. That felt like weeks ago but it was hardly a day. Messages from my friends all saying where are you, are you ok, Vanessa whats going on. Many calls from both my parents and voicemails from my mom. One message that stuck out was from one of my brothers, it said, "Nessa are you going to come home?" That made my heart sink. I felt bad for my brothers. They are all expected to attend Harvard like I am and become successful and I can already see the pressure being applied to them at a younger age. My dad just wasn't fair to any of us. Luke came downstairs and saw my sad look as I looked at my phone, "you ok?" He said. "I think I need to go home now." I said slumping into my chair. He smiled and walked over lightly kissing me, "I think that's a good idea."

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