3. Chapter 2
October 5, 2012
The fresh cuts sting my arms under my sweatshirt, but I ignore them. Thank god it's cold today. I need an excuse for my sweatshirts. This morning I examined my arms in the mirror, what I did to myself, what I picked the scissors up for. My mind. My mind did this to me. I couldn't do it anymore I needed to do something to leak out the pain. I swore to myself I'd never do it again. I wonder how long that feeble promise will last.......
October 7, 2012
It was all true. I can't believe I couldn't see it. Margo, the one girl that I thought was my best friend, the girl I trusted with my life was using me too. She didn't care about me, she just cared about getting what she wants. I thought she genuinely liked me for who I was- I mean she hung out with me for three years. Now I figured out that it was fake. It was all fake. Just like the bitches that are her friends. I knew they were fake, that's why I didn't want to get involved with them. I thought she was different. It turns out that Margo's just like them. She just has a pretty good disguise. It feels like everything's falling apart around me. This was supposed to be an awesome year. It was supposed to be perfect. Now I'm slowly tearing off the masks of everybody, and the more masks I tear off the worse I feel. I just want to escape. I just want to leave. I just want to breathe. I want to go where I'm accepted; I want to be with people who when they are with me, won't go off with their friends when they see them. I want to be with people who genuinely like me. I'm so tired of dealing with fake people I can't take it anymore.