Where are you and I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight
I need somebody and always
this sick strange darkness.
Its been a month since Luke kissed me and not one of us brought it up but after he brought me to that park... it brought back so much memories. It was our favorite park we would go to together until I... Anyways he hasn't been talking to be since the kiss and I feel like I'm just a person to go to and kiss and stuff or him to get over the 'dead' Emma (Me). I think its about time I tell everyone who I am before they find out and I have none of them left. Sighing I got up off the couch and waltz into the kitchen looking through the fridge for something to eat. Not finding something of my liking I decided to go to the store. Kenzie was playing with her Barbie's so I walked over to her kneeling down to her height.
"Hai beauty'' I said to her
"Hi Emmy.." She replied in a sad tone. I took her into my lap and asked her
"What's wrong babe?" She didn't answer so I made her look at me.
"I want mummy " I could feel the tears that were threatening to trickle down but I blinked them away. Maybe I could tell Kenzie. I mean if I tell her maybe she won't bother Luke about wanting mummy. But then she would tell Luke who I really am. Mentally groaning I stood up with her.
"How about we go shopping yeah?" She nodded her head. I told her I was going to get ready and to wait in Luke's room (they were at Luke's house) with her boots. I put on my outfit and grabbed my hair pulling it into a messy bun. Walking into the room to get Kenzie to see Luke with her.
"Hi.." Speaking of awkward. I thought in my head. We just kept staring at each other's eyes until Kenzie started speaking.
"Dada Emmy take me to store!" Kenzie announced out of nowhere. Luke looked at me and sighed turning his attention back to Kenzie.
"Babe I don't think that's a good idea." He told her softly
"But daddy! I want to go store wif Emmy!" Kenzie shouted. Luke had given her the 'don't do this right now' look but she started yelling again until Luke had an annoyed look on his face.
I have had enough of this. I tried my hardest not to yell at Kenzie but she was just being a pain right now and I already have enough on my plate I don't need a screaming child
"DAMNIT KENZIE I SAID NO!" I yelled. I didn't mean to I just wanted her to listen. Sighing I took a seat on the bed running a hand through my messy hair. I tried reaching for Kenzie's arm but she pulled away as a single tear rolled down her small face as she ran behind Emma.
"Mommy no yell at me!" she answered back through a shaky voice and tear stained face. I know what she meant, If Emma was here she wouldn't have yelled at her but what does Kenzie know she's just a kid.
Inhaling deeply and exhaling through my mouth I said
"Emma I think its time for you to leave.."
"No! Emmy stay" kenize tried to argue but was stopped by Emma.
"Kenzie I have homework to finish at home and if I want to pass school and go to college I have to do my homework. Maybe we can go to the store another time, just not today." She told her getting down to her level and hugging her as Kenzie hugged back.
I didn't want to leave but I think that's the best thing to do right now with everything that jus happened. Luke was pretty mad considering he never raises his voice at Kenzie. I wasn't lying about the homework part either I had to catch myself up on my online school, but I doubt Luke will let me take Kenzie out to the store let a lone babysit anymore.
"I'll erm see you later..bye bab- Luke, bye Kenzie." Kenzie gave me one last hug while Luke didn't even look at me. Mentally sighing I turned around and headed for the park Luke and I went to when he kissed me.