"Where have you been?" Zayn asked as I walked into his apartment.
I looked up and saw him staring at the TV screen with his feet propped up on his coffee table and his arms spread out on the top of the couch. This is a scene I have seem many times. I would walk in on my dad doing the same thing except when I would walk in, he would just look at me and find a reason to be mad at me and do something. I could have been the best child in the whole world and he would think of something to beat the crap outta me for.
"What the fuck do you think you are doing home so late!?" He screamed.
I looked up from my iPod screen and saw my dad getting up from his spot on the couch and carging towards me. I could feel my eyes growing wide with fear. I wasn't able to answer his question because he was grabbing my neck with one hand and pressing me against the door. My feet were dangled about the ground by at least a foot and there was no oxygen getting to my lungs. My iPod fell to the floor as my hands began to claw at my fathers hand. He was fressing on my neck so hard that I could feel the bruises that were going to be spotting along my neck by tomorrow morning.
"I said, what the fuck do you think you are doing home so late!?"
I let out gasps of air trying to signal to him that I couldn't breath but he didn't seem to care. He pressed against harder before he flung me towards the couch. I landed on my back and you could hear a loud 'thud'. The air that was left in my lungs was then completely knocked out of me and no matter how many gasps of air I tried to catch, I couldn't seem to get any air back into my system.
"You think you can just come home at all hours of the night?! Who do you think you are?! Huh?"
By the time he finished his sentence he was by my side but by the lack of an answer from me, I seemed to only piss him off more causeing him to send his foot crushing into my ribs like a wrecking ball. I heard a snap but couldn't do anything about it because i was being picked up and dragged by my hair towards my room. My hands flew up to his to try and stop some of the pain radiating at the top of my skull to continue down and put me in anymore pain than I am already in.
I was able to get some air back into my system but not nearly enought to get out a full sentence, "dad- stop- please-" I gasped.
He slammed me down once we were in my room and just laughed, "you honestly think I care? I don't need to stop! Don't you get it? Your mom and twin brother are gone. Now, I get to do as I please to you."
There was an evil grin playing on his lips as he picked me up and threw me down onto my bed. It didn't take me long to figure out what he was going to do to me... again.
"Umm, Cassidy?" Zayn asked snapping me out of my nightmare of a memory.
"Ye-yeah... I'm fine," I mumbled walking towards the spare bedroom.
"Cassidy," he said jumping up from the couch and running over to me. "What's going on? Is everything okay?"
He grabbed my shoulder and turned me to face him but when I looked up, I broke down. The tears came streaming down my face and I collapsed onto the floor at my brothers feet.
"Cassidy?!" He yelled dropping to the floor in front of me. "What the hell is wrong!?"
He pulled me into his lap and I cried on his shoulder. There was nothing else I could do- I dodn't know what to do... How do I tell my twi brother that our father beat me? Raped me?... How do I tell him that when him and mom left, he took everything out on me? That I have been made to feel like dirt the second half of my life...
"It's dad.." I sobbed.
"What? What's wrong with him?"
"It-it's not what's wrong with him- it's what he did..."
"What did he do?"
"He beat me-"
"There is more!?" He yelled pullin away slightly trying to look at my face.
"He- raped me," I whispered.
I could feel Zayn's whole body shake with anger. I've seen him mad once before and that was when we were 12. Right before mom took him and left. He found out that his best friend in the whole world died from a car accident. He was punching through the wall and throwing everything he saw. I was scary actually but I somehow understood his anger.
"I am going to kill him."
"Because- I don't know... he is my dad- our dad-"
"No. No dad of mine would do this."
Zayn then moved me off of his lap and stood up. He was about to walk into his but he stopped and turned towards me. His face wasn't showing any emotion. He was stone cold and not even his eyes showed the slightest emotion. The were almost completely black. Not that beautiful carmel color; just black.
I sat on the floor crying for another good five minutes before I dragged myself into the spare bedroom just to collapse agian except this time it wasn't because of crying. My whole body felt like it was on fire and pain just roared in pain and I didn't know how to handle it. Period pains? I don't know though because I've never had a period? I know and 20 year old who hasn't had her period yet. I've hit the other parts of puberty though?
I have no clue what the hell is happening and there is nothing I can do about it. This must be what it feels like for every other girl during that time of the month. A raging pain and heat throughout your whole body.
I kicked the door closed with my foot not caring about the loud slamming noise that came after. All I wanted to do was curl up into a ball. This wasn't a normal feeling scorching through my body. The worst part about this is, that guy from earlier came to the front of my mind... What the hell is wrong with me? First I break down because of my dad and now I am having the weirdest feeling and thinking of a complete stranger...