I down my keys down on the side and i decided it was time for some lunch, i walked to the fridge and grabbed the cheese and the butter closing the fridge when i had a grasp on them and they were placed to the worktop. I looked through my cupboard roaming my hand to find the bread, when i had found it I grabbed a knife and started to butter the beard smiring it all over the piece and then i grabbed the cheese grating it and then finally putting the perfect cheese sandwich together pushing it past my lips in to my mouth chewing it slowly so i didn't choke. After i was satisfied with my now full up stomach, i walked to my bedroom slowing sitting my self on the bed. I looked to the clock and saw it was only one o'clock. Suddenly feeling something struck me like a lightning bolt having the urge to run into the bathroom and- and-
Let me get something straight, Its has been nearly six months since I had the worst life you could ever imagine but now that was different, i was alone, free from the pain from the past but that has all past and i have decide to keep myself to myself, ignore the world and live in my own. A life without Br- that when my body took a turn for the worse and dragged me straight into the bathroom and locking myself in there even though nobody was even in my house, nobody had been in this house except me and i hope it stays that way.
Im fine, alone. My hand had a mine of its own and shot to the razor that was laying on it side calling my name. 'Let all you worry disappear, i can do that' That's what it called out to me, this daunting words ringing through my ear and into my brain but not out the other ear, the words stuck firmly in my brain repeating over and over again.
I couldn't get a handle of my side, my brain and hand have a mind of there own taking over my body paralyzing me, forcing me to suffer but feel free. My hand dragged its side along the bath stopping right in front of the razor, i scrunched my eyes together trying to fight the urge but nothing worked so my hand leaped to the handle of the razor slowly, gradually bringing it to my rist, i started to shake but it was to late my razor blade was layed on my wrist and with one slash, a deep, red, cut was sliced into my wrist.
I gritted my teeth and sucked through my teeth in pain also scrunching my eyes once again but that didn't make the pain go away, when the pain died down i turned on the tap and watched the cold water run down the sink. I put my wrist in the water feeling a sting as the water trail on my skin. When my wrist felt slightly better i rushed out of the bathroom and into my bedroom grabbing a long sleeved t-shirt out of my wardrobe, pulling it over my head and over my unsatisfying body, I shuffled out of the room and jumped onto the couch feeling comfortable.
My dainty hand hovered over the top on the TV remote and with one move it was im my grasp, i press on the power button to see the news pop up, you how the news go's. nothing interesting. Just when i was about to turn the channel over way from the boring 'ness' , the last people i wanted to see shot up on to my screen as the news started talking about their life stories and where they are now. Apparently Brad has one sibling, his brother. I fiddled with my hands on my lap, yeah i mean i don't care about him anymore he hates me and i hate him, he broke me to piece i never want to speak to him ever again he doesn't deserve my words and my ears hearing him words.
Tristan, same old funny quirky chap, James, the big daddy of the group but still acts as crazy as the rest of them and finally Con. How he has changed he doesn't have that sparkle in his eyes i used to see, he just has a massive fake smile plastered but i guess he is just as broke down as i am right now. But as the news carried on it showed they are touring the US as a supporting act for Austin Mahone! Then it carried on saying they are going on there own tour straight off! They just started in a garage and now here. is that even possible. I guess it is. I knew they were going to make it but its put a dagger in my heart that-that they forgot me, was i just nobody, no wait let me correct that. Yes i am.
That's when i felt something wet pour down my face tasting the sweet, salty tear stream down my face, that's when anger built up inside of me and i through the remote at the screen making it fall of the stand and smash. I gripped my hair rocking back and forth regretting i just saw that, it just made me into a bigger mess, im just digging a big hole so when its ready i can fall in and never return. I think its time for change, for good. Without stopping i grabbed my purse and coat walking out my apartment, slamming the door behind me.
As i pulled the door open to the hairdressers i was greeted by a woman asking me what i was here for and when i told her i wanted a change she sat me down on the chair and got the hair die. She gave me a quick swift hair cut and soon got onto dyeing it, i told her i didn't mind what colour its going to be because i just want what her opinion because im not very good at them... After this i don't want to be recognised, especially not recognised by myself. I sat there watching her pick up the dye and smoother it over a section of my hair and wrap it quickly using the bottom of a comb to fold the foil in place and that section of hair.
After hours of dyeing my hair and waiting for it to dye and everything, it was finally done, I looked into the mirror looking at my Blue beautiful hair, my favourite colour is blue so im not complaining, it actually really suits me! I payed the woman and thanked her, i walked out of the hair dressers i checked my watch and i had 10 to get to work! I am not a photographer and i love my job but my boss has be really distant to me recently so i think i might be fired soon, well that's was i presume... I got it to my car driving to work.
I saw my Boss sitting in her office tapping her fingers anxiously on the wooden desk place in front of her, she looked at me in disbelief as i walked through the door and her eyes shot off her head examining my new bright blue hair, that i absolutely adore! "Wow Maddie i love your new hair, what made you want a big change like that! I would dare do that to my hair probably because no colour would suit me expect my natural colour" She laughed at her remark and i laughed slightly as well, thanking her about my complementing on my new hair do.
"Ah Madeline, i have big news for you, you will love it! I know you wont expect this so that's good but... I have a promotion for you! YOUR GOING TO THE USA!" My boss jumped up and down in excitement while i just stood there gobsmacked at the opportunity. "no-no I CANT WAIT THANK YOU!" I started to jump to i cant wait my feet just want to get on that plane now and jet off and see new exiting things! "When do i go?" I asked unsure... "Tomorrow you flight is tomorrow night giving you time to get pack and off to the USA!" Tomorrow whoa so soon! BYE UK AND HELLO USA!