Prodigy's Hopefully Constructive Criticism [Closed, sorry]

I will read at least part of your ORIGINAL story and give you criticism that is thorough, hopefully constructive, possibly positive, and definitely nit-picky. You have been warned. Cover credit goes to the wonderful dramaticllama Nightshade :D


14. Surreptitiously Supercilious by River_Summers

I'm sorry I took so long to type this up after reading it, especially since I have very little to say! I loved this story so much - the characters were relatable, the plot was original and the shipping was perfect :) I'm really at a loss for what to criticize, other than the lack of a sequel! The only point I was slightly confused on was why Oliver had to hide out in Edmund's shop all day. Couldn't he have just waited a bit and then left? Unless the town was too small and they would've found him pretty quickly. Other than that, there are just a few small typos that I noticed; here are the corrections:

Chap 12 - it should be "Jackson Tyler...has inquired..."

Chap 13 - "...arm was also around my shoulders."

Chap 14 - first paragraph, "...Melissa, I accidentally..."

Chap 15 - "...they will be. They've got to be."


As usual, excellent story!! Please give us another soon :)

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