At Cambridge

A lot of things happened while I was at Cambridge. There were way too many thoughts and feelings and events and to simply note down, so I guess I'll tell the whole story. That's the only way it's going to make sense.


20. Twenty

I was going to leave but Ed kissed me again and now it's an hour later and I'm still here. We're sitting on the couch watching TV and it's such a casual thing even though this whole new thing between us seems to complete opposite of casual. It does feel so natural though, to sit here with him, my hand between both of his, our heads resting near each other's. 

I feel terrible about George. I did like him but as soon as this happened between Ed and I, all feelings for George just went. Maybe that's awful of me. Maybe it's not too bad because it was never very serious anyway. I feel bad either way though.

"I have to go soon." I say, not looking at him because I know the exact smug smile that will cross his face as soon as I tell him why I'm leaving. "I have to go and break up with George."

He doesn't speak for a moment and I have no choice but to look at him. Sure enough, that smile is smugger than ever. 

"Don't look like that!" I say but I'm laughing a little bit. "I feel terrible."

"Do you still like him?" Ed asks, raising an eyebrow.

"No!" I say, shaking my head. "No. I just feel bad. It's a bit out of nowhere."

"He'll be okay." Ed smiles down at our hands. "Or maybe he won't. He's a bit of a pu-"

"Stop being mean!" I object. 

He laughs. "Fine, whatever."

"I'm gonna go and get it over with." I say, standing up. 

Ed grabs my hand and pulls me towards him, kissing me. "Come back afterwards, yeah?"

"Yeah I'll be back in a bit." I smile at him. "I have to say, this is kind of weird. You're usually, like, mean to me. It's weird that you're kissing me."

He laughs. "Would you rather I didn't?"

"I never said that." I say, grinning. "Okay, see you in a bit."

"Don't be long." he says, letting go of my hand. I leave the house and I've never been in more of a hurry to go back somewhere.

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