Shadow of the past
" i should let go." My heart once shouted "don't let go just hang in there." My brain murmured,tears started to escape my eyes, reality slaps me on the face,and was knocked down by those memories."
I was stuck in this illusions stuck in my own perception of love but then again reality had me broken hearted, i wish to skip everything i wish to end this pain but in the end things are all in the mind i am not physically hurt, but spiritually absent of everything that has happened that i haven't woken up. Reality didn't come along with me when i was acting like a jerk believing every sweet things that was registered in my mind as true love but then again it was just love and it isn't true. I was left hanging by a moment in every slap of reality on my face because honestly, it slaps me everytime im with you. I wasted tears and efforts for you, i blame myself for being a fool believing that one day our love story wouldn't end up like this, i know this is pointless,hopeless,useless for holding on to those sweet words
But i couldn't resist the love that you have shown me may it be a game or may it be true,holding on to the things that i was used to before cuts the deepest end of my heart, if it was recorded on a mix tape i wouldn't hesitate but play it everytime i miss you, i am holding on to moments i am holding on to the things that i believe would happen to us, we are still young and stubborn. We wander every streets that we haven't been, we opened our hearts and love, we get hurt,we cry, we laugh. Every teardrop brings laughter in the end because life may not be perfect,destiny may not lead you to the person you
Wished to be with,but everything has it's reason, everything has it's lessons in life it may be good or bad, i am not blaming you for the things but instead i am blaming myself for pushing my love for you for trying to put up some space for me and you in your heart i am setting you free now, because holding back to the memories hurts me so much holding back
Holding back to the thought of you loving me, or for us to work out
Is useless i am not blaming you, i appreciate the efforts you gave me for creating a smile on my face for making me feel happy and made me feel how is it to have a boyfriend thank you for letting me part of your wonderful world, thank you for letting me experience how love was when it was real how you and me would be possible if our hearts would beat as one.
But then again our hearts were meant to beat as separate feelings, thoughts of you still lingers in my mind, tears starts to fall as i am reminiscing old stuff's remembering how it used to be between both of us, i think i have loved you so deeply that even the deepest sanctuary in my heart has opened up to put some space, i better say goodbye
And burry every drop of those memories cause everything hurts right now even just simply looking at you hurts, because looking at you makes me fall inlove with you again,and i know i shouldn't anymore.