Lillian isn't your average 17 year old she doesn't want to be notice. But it all changes after her older brother has a party...


4. Guilt

Lillian's POV

I could hear but I couldn't open my eyes I was so confused. I felt a muscular hand assuming it was a man like my dad! ""

I feel a hug and someone says "She's awake!" The voice was so familiar but I don't know how. I began to open my eyes seeing 5 tall men, one which seemed to be a doctor. I was scared I began to have an anxiety attack I could breathe I was freaking out. Then I felt a hug and someone rubbing circles on my back and everything came to me I am I just sobbed out the words "I'm sorry, I am so stupid this is why I don't shared feelings."

"It's not your fault. Don't ever blame yourself." I look and remember his name was Luke he was so sweet and handsome i was stunned. The tears kept flowing when I felt other arms still a man but he said "I am sorry. It was my fault." It was Michael that was his name. Then I felt two other arms and felt so relaxed I fell asleep.

Luke's POV

I look at her body so frail from all the blood loss she looked like china. To think I met this girl while drunk and now I was with her at a hospital comforting her falling for her. Michael seemed so ashamed I went over and told him "I am sorry I was so harsh you just didn't know she cut."

"But I should of been more considerate" he said now looking at the floor. Calum and Ashton felt guilty but Michael had it the worse he couldn't forgive himself until she got better. That day I still think he would feel bad.

Lilian's POV

I finally woke up and felt reenergized and all of the boys were still in the room. I just look blankly at all of them I felt so weird being around all of these people being the center of attention. Soon Luke was introducing me to his friends "this is Calum." He said about the one with black hair he had a very sorrow look like he was my brother. "This is Ashton ." He said about the boy with brown curly hair he put on a smile and bowed which made me laugh. "And finally this is Michael." He seemed so sad ABD guilty he just looked at the floor and I knew he though it was his fault because I know what it feels like to blame yourself. I just told him "don't feel guilty that is what got me this way." I say revealing my wrists. He just looks and says "I am sorry I just just I should of been better." I send him a smile and he sends a fake smile back.

I didn't want to see my grandma I was moving our before the party but I don't trust myself now. I had to find somewhere to stay because my grandma already rented out my room. I began to freak out, why do I always have these damn anxiety attacks. "What's wrong." Ashton asked while Luke comforted me. "I don't have anywhere to live. I have no home!" I began to breath harder ad without letting anyone no Michael said "You can stay with us if u want to. I mean it's the least we can do." No one seemed it disagree so I guess I will be going there.

After I got a few checks on my stitches I was able I go home. We'll go with 4 strangers, huh I never thought I would say that. When I got to there house it was a total wreck clothes were everywhere and it smelled like a hell-hole. There was one room that was clean and had a nice bed and tv I this was the guest room, I guess I got lucky. The whole evening the guys helped me do everything. It was weird I was used to being alone and doing things myself but it was ok because the loss of blood made me feel like I couldn't do anything. That night I laid down early the boys would check on me ever half in hour while all i did was lay ad watch tv I couldn't sleep.

Luke's POV

I was going in to check on Lillie and I saw her on her phone facing the front of her bed. So I decided to scare her I closed the door slowly and crept up on her grab her torso and yelled. "WHAT THE HELL LUKE U SCARED THE LIVING CRAP OUT OF ME!" She yelled and fake punch my chest then threw a pillow at me. "I was just checking in." I say as I was about to leave she said "Wait, even thought u are a bastard... " she said jokingly "I really don't want to sleep alone." I decided to sleep with her but first I had to tell the boys so they wouldn't have to check in. After that I went in a laude down with her and cuddle ad her to help her sleep. After a while she fell asleep her breathing slowed and I began to fall a asleep as we'll. She was just amazing kind and beautiful. I couldn't get over that. That was my last thought as I fell asleep.

I woke up to her screaming "No Zorb!" And comforted her. As much as I didn't want the question I said " I know you don't want it talk about it but it will make you feel better. Who's Zorb?"

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